If your daughter brought home someone you really didn't approve of would you still let her date them? Why or why not?

Question

nisnaia · Accepted Answer

Yea of course. If it's a real bad person I would talk to her about it though. Would already raise her like that so I can talk to her about these things.

Cubus · Accepted Answer

It depends. You can't generalise.

Summeroflove · Answer

This depends on more then that

NathanDavis · Answer

I am a very reasonable and open enough person... if I didn't approve of someone then I would have very real and valid reasons to do so, and so... they would have to be considered and respected

now, about "allowing" her to date someone or not, that would depend on other factors like age, the kind of relationship they would have, her mindset, and the partners mindset as well and of course the mother would have a say as well

and then it would be actual reasons of why I do not approve of it... there could be lesser things and some greater things that I would just not be able to overlook or tolerate. lol

MrPickles13 · Answer

If I ever do have kids I'd probably for one want to get to know then more so not to pass to much judgement. But then maybe just warm her to be cautions and that id be there if she needed me as it's not really your place to control who they date they are there own person who needs to grow and make mistakes and learn and also they would probably just date them anyway but at least if I didn't try to control it I could support her more and not have to worry as much as she likely be more open and less secretive

Blackcosmo · Answer

There's a good reason I wouldn't approve of them like if they're a total asshole or something. I'm not judgmental so a few flaws isn't gonna hurt anyone and no one's perfect, also bad habits can be fixed of course. What matters is if they're a good person and treat her right.

laurieluvsit · Answer

Typically, what you describe is done out of rebellion due to a less than kosher relationship between the parents and the daughter.

The only way to avoid this is to have a good close relationship with your daughter as a parent. Most kids who have good relationships want to please their parents, not disappoint them.

If the relationship is rocky, this is just going to be one of the rocks.

razelove · Answer

Yes, I would go overboard about how much I support them, and how he seems like a great guy. I noticed with myself, and my sisters, when my parents resisted, we doubled down, when they liked who we were dating, it cooled off.

So if they bring home someone I really like, I'm going to be all like you're too blond!

Kaamraj · Answer

If by someone who I know is a bad person, then I'd make it clear that if you are above the age of 18 then you're now an adult and can move out of the hosue then you can do whatever you want. But as long as you are younger than 18 and under my roof there are some rules (my rules) that you have to follow.

Th3ft · Answer

So similar to what Miss Laurie said I think that the best way to avoid something like this is when you have an outstanding relationship with your kids. It maybe just be that the guy is really good at hiding how much of an asshole he really is and she can’t tell. And that is a learning moment. In which case I would allow it to continue to some degree. But also it depends on my relationship with her at this moment. Like how much can I do for her and how much will she listen.

Sixgunsound · Answer

When my daughters are old enough to date, I would hope that I would have prepared them for reality and adult life. I would hope that they would have self-confidence and discernment and the ability to tell who a man is and whether or not he is worth her time. In my house I expect my rules to be followed; in her apartment or house she can do whatever the you know what she wants.

Blackcupcake · Answer

there has to be reasons…

if I don’t approve for valid reasons then my opinion wouldn’t change, however I wouldn’t force her to leave him, I would educate her, make her aware of things and then keep an eye, make sure she’s safe, protected and smart…

jahaims · Answer

Depends on her age. If she is an adult she can do what she wants. I would tell her why I feel the way I feel and warn her that she is free to make her own mistakes but then they are her mistakes and I will not be helping her when I warned her she was going to shoot herself in the foot.

Shamalien · Answer

If I didn’t like em I’d make em look like an idiot instead of telling her she can’t date him. I might be like “hey, let’s play some soccer” and then bodycheck him. Or if he’s strong then play the mental route, ask him questions he won’t give intelligent responses to. If he’s strong and smart then fuck yo she should just date him lol

Agape93 · Answer

Sure, but make it clear to that person that if something happens to my daughter, they'll never find what's left of em.

dustybiker · Answer

Glad I don’t have a daughter. I would assume she would be sensible by dating age. She’d have to live her own life and make her own mistakes. If she wouldn’t trust me to trust her on that she wouldn’t come to me for advice when it falls apart.

ThoseCognacEyes · Answer

I don’t have kids and I’m not married but if I did have a daughter I would be protective of her. If she’s with someone who hurt her in any way shape or form, I’m gonna have to take him out, unfortunately for him.

Anthony20108 · Answer

yeah i would date them if i loved them because it's my partner so my feelings should matter the most in choosing MY partner right?, not my family's lol, but of course i love my family so i would probably listen to what they had to say and try to understand why they feel the way they do.

letuswaltzforthedead · Answer

I would try to talk to her about it. It depends why I dont approve of the guy because if it's something minor, I rather have her learn her lesson. if its anything else, she's absolutely forbidden.

Kaneki05 · Answer

"Let her" there is not letting she's a person free to do what she wants. I don't control her actions. The best I can do is give my advice.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

I believe one’s job as a parent is to help children learn how to make good decisions for themselves. Once you permit them to date, you should have had that covered and their mistakes are their own.

Whatever2929292 · Answer

If she was under 18 (even older if she was living with me I could say he ain't to be in my house) it would depend but I guess not.  Over 18... Not much I can do

AviatorTom · Answer

If my daughter is an adult, she can date whoever she wants. I may voice my approval or disapproval but it's not my place to li it who she can date. Different story if she's a teenager living at home.

_deeznuts · Answer

I would still let her date them, unless they were like a downright asshole to everyone, then yeah no get outta here

Changiis07 · Answer

I would talk to her first and let her know what is it exactly that I do not like then let her make her own decisions as she can take my advice or not

FilmGuy93 · Answer

I mean... you have to let them date, to a certain point. If there's one thing I've seen about teenagers; they're going to do whatever they're going to do.

silkjames · Answer

Once my daughter left the room I would put the fear of God in homeboy eyes other than that all u can do is keep a close eye on there relationship we are parents we can't help it:)!

DizzyDesii · Answer

If she's 17 and under absolutely not. When she's 18 then she can run along if she wants

Rockstarrrrr · Answer

It's gonna be long until that happens lol.. But I would tell her to end it right away... I'm not going to wait until the worst happen.. Nobody is taking advantage of her on my watch

ElvenMr · Answer

No, but i would try to get to know him first, maybe my first impression of him was not that great, but otherwise...

Sugar100 · Answer

I’m 25 in October I never have brought any guy ever to meet my parents. All the men I meet hide and run away from meeting parents

exitseven · Answer

I would not prevent her from seeing him. I know it would not end well. However if it got too serious this kid might end up missing.

Stars12122 · Answer

If they were under 18 and lived in my house then no I wouldn't.

20yearsolder · Answer

She's going to sneak behind your back and do it anyway if you disapprove.

Surely · Answer

I would be cleaning my shotgun. And casually mention that whatever you do to my little girl. I WILL do to you! Cause the more you say. The more determined they would be to be together!

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Re: Update: How do you feel about it? Were your exes good boyfriends? Or did they turn out to be douches?

AimeeKyle · Answer

Yes. I would also have conversation with her about traits, etc. If you try to block her from dating him, your relationship with her can go south really fast.

Anonymous · Answer

My sister brought home a black thug to piss my parents off, they used reverse psychology. Now she's dating a regular white guy

loveslongnails · Answer

Sure I would, but I'd give her my opinion and I'd tell her why. Ultimately, it's her life, her choices, her mistakes to make.

motownplayer2000 · Answer

If she is grown and out my house. She will have to learn the hard way. If she is under my roof and still under my guard then no.

BuLLdogLover03 · Answer

Well to be honest probably not but if they seem really happy together maybe

In_Trance · Answer

I don't think approval is part of the process. I dunno where that ever came from. People do what they feel is right for them, approval or not

Twalli · Answer

I would tell her why I disapprove of him, but it's her choice. It's also my choice to write her out of my will. That almost happened to my sister.

driven159 · Answer

Because as a parent if you say you don't like him, she will keep him even longer and she needs to find her own way through life

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

I’d be happy they’re AT LEAST a dude (a real one) like it SHOULD be and ALWAYS should be

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

If she's grown then it's her life so of course I would

Anonymous · Answer

are you dating the person or is your mom? why should you care what your mom thinks? is it your life or hers that you're living?

Anonymous · Answer

If she was 18, yes; but I would voice my concerns. If she was under 18, it would depend on how old he was.

MrJoeyy · Answer

Yes because it's not your decision who your child dates to begin with. Only theirs.

Anonymous · Answer

if she is over 18 she can date who she wants but I will let her know i don't like them and that they are not welcome in my home

slatyb · Answer

How could I stop her?

_Just_A_girl_ · Answer

Hm I'd have no choice.

Andres77 · Answer

They both know better.

RuthlessAggression · Answer

The more you push back, the more they will

EnglishEuropean · Answer

I would do everything I could to dissuade them.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't have kids lol

EarthRealm · Answer

I smell Weaknesses.

Anonymous · Answer

What if I would have a son?

If your daughter brought home someone you really didn't approve of would you still let her date them? Why or why not?

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