Sometimes my boyfriend says I’m a 8/9 and others he says I’m alright and a 7 what does he really think?

[Anonymous]

He told me whenever it’s been a few days of no sex etc that i actually am really hot and a 8/9 but he doesn’t like to tell me because I have a big ego

Then he told me when it’s more steady he thinks im way above average but not model worthy but maintains im a 8/9

What does he think I really am?

[Rkbleezy]

Well its hard to tell with just this bit of information. But, ill give you to opinions.

A) He is more attracted to the way you personally look so he personally sees you as an 8/9. Everyone has a different scale for every guy/girl they meet. No one rates everyone the exact same.

B) He could be stretching the truth in order to stay with you and get a girl who's loyal, committed, easy to work with, and will have sex with him whenever.

These are really the only two options I can give based on the information. And honestly I feel it would take a lot of communication and a watchful eye to make any kind of conclusion. But goodluck and I wish you the best!

[CoolCatMar1]

Soooo this means?

[Rkbleezy]

@CoolCatMar1 It means that she needs to not worry so much about the rating. Focus on communication and time, and start to look in to why he is changing his answer. And what affects him changing his answer. Is it mood, sex, affection, affirmation, job, feelings, etc. Because you’ll either find that he is genuinely in a bad mood when he says your a 7. Or he is just trying to keep you in “check” with the idea of ego. Using the term not for a benefit. But rather to make sure you stay conformed to a realm of beauty that he can feel comfortable with and keep a hand in.
Like I said. Its very hard to determine from just a short string of text.

[CoolCatMar1]

Yeah i see

[Asker]

He does when he’s mad at me call me a 7 and when he’s more horny or happy with me says 9. So which does he think?

[Rkbleezy]

So if you add this in to the mix then it starts to make him sound more emotionally connected than relationally connected. For instance someone who cares deeply for you on a personal level will see you as a (lets use 8 as an example). That will most likely not deviate unless he finds out something that he doesn't like about you. However, with an emotional connection someone can sway very easily based on many factors. For instance their mood, job, family life, mental health, physical health, attraction to partner, sexual desires, and the list goes on. Emotional based love is very unsteady grounds. So my best recommendation would be to spend time in short, but reoccurring conversations about what things he loves about you that aren't just "because your so pretty", or "Because your so sweet kind and gentle". If you open up the thought process to a deeper level, it will make him start to seek deeper understanding, and will inevitably make a stronger connection. But as with all things relationship wise, if you really see no good growth, you could try out a relationship counselor. They always have good truth that can help. Hopefully this helps.

[DarkWinterNights]

I have never discussed my attractiveness rating with a woman I’m interested in, much less actually dating. I would be questioning his intentions.

[CoolCatMar1]

Okayyy

[FilmGuy93]

He probably thinks you're an 8, in general.