What should I do if my boyfriend is often unreachable until the next day when he goes out?

[Anonymous]

[Guy13]

It sounds like Situationship if your boyfriend is generally unreachable or only accessible during light or daytime hours. He is likely someone else’s boyfriend or husband.
What do you know for certain about this guy. I would not share details of either my personal or professional life with this individual. I am assuming this is real life and in real time not a digital or long distance relationship.

[Angelo75]

I would start putting more pressure to know more about his background.
Like meeting his parents, other friends and figure out how to actually go to his house.
Even if it's a long-distance-relationship it's a very simple principle:
"If you're going to invest time emotionally in this guy, you will want to know if he's legit."

So you will have to get deeper into his environment, otherwise you are leaving a big blind spot open.

Unless you don't mind that he might be using you as "the girl aside" his real marriage.

[Anemone978]

Well if you are a psycho like me you can always track down where he is and see what he's up to... then if you confirm he defo is cheating dump him in text and block him so he never has closure..

[Asker]

Lol, we're long distance can't do that 😝

[Anemone978]

It's still possible with skills.. hahaha im just kidding 🤣😂
But I have to say its very suspicious even more so because it is long distance...

[red324]

Thought that was standard procedure for girls. Dump through a text then block

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Men should immediately ditch women who have to spend their time tracking them down. It's more difficult for a women to find a man that she likes that's willing to settle for her than for a man to find a women to have sex with.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner Your point being?
If I actually needed to track a guy down we wouldn't be in a relationship to begin with...
My point is men lie... They will drag a relationship on even when they don't really want you...
So it's best to find out the truth so the girl can move on...

[red324]

Women do the same to me. They lie too they'll drag on the texting back and forth for several weeks instead of just saying they don't like me

[Anemone978]

@red324 Yeah a lot of people are dumb as fuck now... with online culture... So isn't it better to save yourself the heartbreak and time by just finding out what these assclowns are up to?
Like I was married and he would go out with his friends, I didn't need to call him or anything because we had trust so I knew he wasn't cheating on me whether he stayed out late til like 2 or 3am
but these online motherfuckers will lie and lie and lie keeping you on the leash, using your love against you... so might as well find out the truth and get rid of them asap... I always do...

[red324]

I agree trust but verify, but do it without them knowing. I went on a couple dates with this one girl and I liked her, but 2 dates was all it took for her pyscho insecurities to come out. She always accused me of cheating seeing other girls etc. How could I possibly cheat when I can't even get them to stick around? We weren't even official yet.

[Anemone978]

@red324 Yeah that's why I suggest to actually verify... else you just look like a psycho and probably are if it's just accusations.. lol

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Seems straightforward. Ditch Pyscho women that stalk. Men can put themselves in a lot of danger dealing w/ women like that. Typically the need to stalk comes deep rooted insecurities and they type of women willing to spend her time stalking is the type that will make a false allegation, set you up etc. I Replace those types ASAP and suggest all men do.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner Yeah, sounds good

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 TY, lot of crazy women out there and because women aren't used to dealing w/ rejection, they typically act way crazier when they face it. I've had windows broken out, Tampons left at my house, allegations made up. Too many guys get desperate so they don't acknowledge the bad behavior when they see it and it takes too much time and energy to train it out of them much easier to get a new one.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner You sound like you had some scary girlfriends with a screw or two loose 😂

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 No, I'm not a big believer in "girlfriends" as limiting yourself to one woman is a terrible idea for a man in my opinion. Most woman aren't used to being rejected or told now by men so they usually make some emotional reaction. How many times has a man you liked rejected you?

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner Hmmm... I don't remember a few... Only one I actually really loved... but luckily I never had sex with any of them...
I assume you probably had sex with these crazy girls... probably why they went crazy when you rejected them... because you used them?

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 That kinda proves my point, even the one rejection you had wasn't a real rejection. Of course I had sex w/ them and I wouldn't characterize any of them as "crazy" they were all highly functioning successful women, one was even a high ranking executive well know in her community. I never used anyone, that belief comes from women believing sex is a value loaded exchange. When done right sex is a beautiful mutually beneficial experience. Several of them I even let come back after having their meltdowns, and one even straight up told me it was the first time a man had ever told her no that made her act the way she did.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner What do you mean it wasn't a real rejection?
You literally called them crazy in your other post?
If you promised them something like a relationship, exclusivity or love, that is using them... because without fake promises most women would not stick around for just sex.. and would not lose their shit because a guy didn't want them...

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 U were rejected but you didn't 100% invest so u still maintained some semblance of control. Re-read. I said there are a lot of crazy girls I did not imply that the ones I saw were crazy. I never said anything about promising anything, you're simply jumping to that conclusion based on your personal experiences not mine. That is false and a lie that women tell each other to help justify emotional decision. Women won't stick around for a regular guy, however when they meet a man that possess the metrics women want height, looks, fitness, money etc, they will do almost anything to keep him. Most men don't understand this (especially younger men) combine that w/ knowing how to sexually satisfy her (something like 70% of women don't orgasm when having sex so if you can be the one that makes her orgasm she's more likely to become addicted to you) and she's going to be reluctant to let you go, hence their reaction. That's literally why everyone who advises men advises them to increase their value first. It's more difficult to understand if you've never actually been w/ a man of value. They lose their shit because it downs on them how difficult it will be to replace the guy. Also by simply saying know u become different from every other man and women are always looking for that guy who they can claim is different from the rest. Most men don't understand this but because of my background I've been able to learn and apply these strategies.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner With that guy... yeah I did invest so that is you just assuming shit.. my whole heart was for him I never felt love like that before I would of died for him... but I'm not desperate enough that I was gonna keep chasing a whore who didn't love me, I have more self respect than that...
As for your stuff I don't know why you keep discussing these things with me because I personally wouldn't go for a guy like you and you would not go for a girl like me so none of it is relevant. Women connect on sex so yes if you can please her in bed and are a type of guy she wants, then yeah she will try her best to get you. This is why women shouldn't sleep with guys for fun because it only benefits the guy..
I know I get very attached by sex that's why I usually be very careful who I sleep with tho I did have one fuck up...

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Read entire statement I said you didn't invest 100% You're the one that brought up the importance of sex, meaning u inherently understand the value of withholding that from him. Who you would "go for" isn't relevant to the conversation. Yes, glad you agree w/ me about the importance of sex. Sex actually benifits both parties as the reality is women would not be able retain the type of man they want w/out it. You just experienced this w/ the guy that rejected you, so even your personal experiences contridict your belief.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner Yeah but even with that guy, if I fucked him he wouldn't of kept me anyways because he liked sleeping with everyone... so I just saved my self more pain... by not letting him use me... Only thing that saved me was I looked into him... so he couldn't lie about it I had proof... and he told me "you wanna leave there is the door"... fucking cunt... that broke me but I wasn't gonna let him know that... So I left and blocked him on everything I never felt more crushed in my life than at that moment.. just thinking about it brings me to tears LOL... So no not everyone who stalks is crazy and will try to chase you down or do underhanded things... We just don't like to be constantly lied to and our time and love wasted on a POS...

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Maybe he would have kept you but the fact is you didn't sleep w/ him and he dropped you. I don't believe in name calling but you left him no choice. I told you that the girls that stalked me weren't crazy, however you've proved my point about the insecurities of women. I disagree and would argue not only do women like to be lied to, but society is partly based on lying to women, because women aren't capable of handling uncomfortable truths.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner He wouldn't have kept me... he was sleeping with others and would not commit but was constantly telling me "I love you", once I get myself sorted, blah blah blah other lies and shit... How did I prove your point of insecurities of women?
Only arrogant women are not able to handle the truth.. if more men where honest, the world might run a bit better...

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 This is something women fail to understand. Love is not symmetrical. He probably did love u however to you love is shown through faithfulness. To men love is shown through loyalty. A man can bang a bunch of women and still genuinely love his main girl. (I go through this every day because of my lifestyle) You proved my point because u generally cared for this man, but because he had other options you couldn't wield the leverage of sex over him which is what women like to do. You were more concerned about the pain u would suffer if he treated u the same way after having sex. If you really liked this man you should have been more concerned about what it would take to retain him. Majority of women are not able to handle the truth which is why men sugar coat everything. If he would have approached you and said hey I just want to have sex w/ you, you wouldn't have gave him the time of day. Telling you the truth benifits you but has no benifit to him. Women want "the truth" so they can easily disqualify men think about it. If women really want the truth why do they spend so much money on makeup, plastic surgery, BBL's etc? (Please don't do the "I don't do that) I'm speaking about women as a whole.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner Yeah I can understand a man can love his main woman.. my dad was a similar goof who cheated on my mom hundreds of times (we all knew even as kids) but eventually he did leave my mom for someone else when I was 17... My dad's favorite line "Its in the past" It's wtf? it was last night 🤣😂
But why would I try to retain a man who doesn't make an effort for me... there really was nothing there it was totally one sided now that I look back LOL Fuck tho it hurts so bad...
Exactly of course I wouldn't of gave him the time of day.. so find someone who would just fuck you and leave me alone.. he was already doing that with other girls anyways so why come hurt me?
Because those sluts can't handle the truth and believe that is how they will catch a man because men like good looks and bodies and don't usually give a fuck about what you make or your personality...

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Your dad had to have some sort of value in order to have 100's of women, which is why your mom stayed. Something else women fail to grasp is no one is telling you to try to retain that man. What everyone in the world is telling you is that if you want a man of that caliber u need to understand they will have other women. If u don't want that then you need to select a lessor man. Women struggle w/ this because of your need to feel special. It hurts because he didn't make you feel special and it's doubly painful because when you attempted to use your leverage, he rejected you again. Most men aren't brave enough to tell a girl to kick rocks. Why would he tell you the truth if it wasn't going to benifit him? Women fail to accept that men have their own set of needs and wants and shouldn't have to compromise them for a women feelings. Think about it, you probably hurt his feelings by not having sex w/ him so why should he be asked to respect yours?

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner My dad only had good looks, some money.. not rich lol, charming when drunk..
He didn't have much else...
As for the guy I loved he didn't even have caliber tho he had a cute face and was 6'2 nothing else really good about him.. he was an asshole and broke... I make more money than he does... He was a way better person when he was younger. And there are way better men out there that won't cheat because they truly love their woman.
You are just a misogynist who thinks you have a right to cheat on women but really you don't. You shouldn't walk through life wanting to hurt people... The reason I was hurt isn't cuz he was fucking other bitches its because he was leading me on wasting my time when he had nothing to offer me, not love, not a relationship, not a future... but kept holding on to me with lies. What leverage did I use on him all I said is I am leaving? He said go ahead... lol so I did... I don't get why you are trying to prove men as this superior being... Men are not more worthy then women... we just need a partner... you want to be hoe than be a hoe but leave nice people alone... I never hurt his feeling I told him I want a boyfriend to have sex he wouldn't give me that... so fuck him... and fuck you too... lol

[red324]

Psychos are good in bed, why would a guy want anyone else? 🤣

[red324]

What are the signs that a guy is just wasting your time and won't commit? I have the same problem with girls. I always get the excuse of oh I need to work on myself before I start dating again and this is after I took her to dinner twice and we've been talking for 3 weeks. It's like okay well I was straight up with you from the beginning, why are you even on a dating site then wasting my time?

[Anemone978]

@red324 I don't know there is usually a lot of red flags... effort is the main one... Do you usually ask to go on the date or does she suggest it?

[red324]

I ask. Sometimes they'll suggest an alternative if they don't like my idea.

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Good looks, money and charm thats a lot! You're just proving how much Value men need to have in order to have options. The flaw in your logic is u don't understand that if the man u find is "way better" he's also going to have other women. Because men dont put in all the work necessary to be HV to settle for one woman. Read your entire statement and look how many times you use the word me. What men hear is me, me, me, you can get away w/ this behavior w/ some beta male simp, but when u try that w/ a Type A male he's just going to move on to a better woman and your going to end up hurt which is exactly what happened. You used the same leverage all woman use, sex. The only difference is you used it against a man that was already getting laid. That's why he showed your the door. Women are so narcissistic that you truly see no issue in the fact that you didn't want to give him what he wants but feel as he's wrong for not providing what you want. This is literally why it's important for men to have options, so they don't have to tolerate bad behavior like this.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner Bad behavior because I don't want 100s of men to use my body as they please and then dump me? Give me a break bro... I'll leave that work to the whores and they can keep men like you because even though you think you are gods gift to women a bitch is gonna hurt you back one day... Go enjoy your Andrew Tate lecture's and stop trying to force this horse shit down my throat I don't care about men like you... My dad is now a sad POS with no family and a whore for a wife.. He tried to get my mom back but she was done... I will find a perfect partner one day and he won't be a POS like you or the other guy or even my dumbass dad... So have fun collecting pussy no cockroach of a man is ever gonna get to feel mine...

[red324]

I'll be as patient as the girl needs as far as sex is concerned just as long as she continues to put in the same amount of effort as me. They never return the effort though

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 No, its bad behavior because u are attempting to weaponize sex. Part of your struggles is that you're looking at relationships like a win loss competition. "Hurt you back" implies that I've intentionally hurt someone. In your case you were hurt because a man you wanted rejected you, however he's did nothing wrong, by sticking to his own standards the fact that you're hurt by that is your own issue, and too many times women tend to heap their problems on men and then get upset when men don't accept them. Myself, your dad and the guy are all fine, and all getting what all men want which is access to women, you're the only one that doesn't have what you want and are feel hurt. Women make this mistake all the time of thinking their pussy is special it isn't and the guy that rejected you already proved that.

[Vegasrunner]

@red324 TY for being a perfect example if my point.

[red324]

@Vegasrunner of what moving on because you can tell they're just wasting my time?

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner How am I weaponizing sex? You guys are getting all the sex you want.. I just ain't letting someone access to it, when they want it... my body I choose who I want to share it with... Sex is a bond I only share in love not lust... Just because you losers don't respect your own body ain't my problem. I was hurt from the promise of a relationship that never happened... not because he rejected me, I rejected him... you twat... I didn't actually loose anything.. but he lost a real woman who loved him and considering all his ex's cheated on him that is all he deserves..
His standards of using women how he pleases and lying to get in their pants is good ethics? yes.. you are completely right... sir...
My dad is now hurting because he is stuck with a bitch he don't want and he ain't getting no new pussy because she won't let him leave with out her unless to go to work lol... So believe you hold the key to relationships all you want... not everyone wants the same garbage as you do... Some people actually want real love bro...
And if I actually wanted to waste my time I could of got that loser because when I dumped him we were actually doing really well... but he was fucking some other girl and that pissed me off.. so instead of acting how he wanted me to I left because A) he didn't give me what I wanted, and B) He just wasn't worth it.. I was really in love with the sweet him from the past not the broken piece of shit he turned into because he delt with too many slut bitches... You can think I am arrogant but I just have self respect and ain't gonna put up with no bullshit for no fucking loser..

[Anemone978]

@red324 I don't know me and you keep picking the wrong people lol

[Vegasrunner]

@red324 No of being "As patient as the girl needs as far as sex is concerned. You're displaying the type of behavior that women claim they want, yet according to you, you've gotten nothing out of it. According to u you've taken this girl out on multiple dates and been straight up w/ her, yet the end result has been a big waste of your time. You're doubling down by asking a women what are red flags because u don't understand thar what women say they want and what they actually want are two completely different things. If I was u I wouldn't be "patient" about anything if a women doesn't meet your standards in your time frame then you have every right to drop her and move on. How much time have you wasted w/ these women that "never return the effort"?

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 You're weaponizing it because you used to potential for sex to try to keep him, that's why once u came clean and admitted u wouldn't have sex with him, he left. Women control access to sex men control access to relationships. No one is saying u have to have sex w/ him, I'm saying you can't be crying because he then takes the relationship away from you. He didn't loss a anything, in fact he saved a lot of time he would have wasted w/ what seems to be an emotionally unstable, women who comes from a broken background. If "real love" is so important to you why have u failed to find it? You already admitted at the start of this post that he rejected you, so trying to pretend you "dumped" him just highlights female delusion as now you're embarrassed so u have to lie about what happened to try to make yourself look better. He rejected u. U weren't enough for him, u are the one that feels hurt, he upgraded, except it and move on. Obviously u being in love w/ him had no value 2 him, so he went and found a better women, and this upsets u which is why you've been reduced to name-calling and other immature behavior. He dodged a huge bullet because I'm guessing this is the same behavior u displayed w/ him. The only loser in this is u, because u lost out on a man that all the other women want, which is they only type of man that is going to make you feel something.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner I told you I didn't use sex against him... I used it to save myself... Honestly the sex had nothing to do with anything in the relationship... You obviously don't know him or really even me... you just are making assumptions by what I tell you... I did dump him, but he didn't care that's all it was.. He didn't move on to anyone else, he is just living life normally because he doesn't care, he doesn't want a relationship with anyone. He is just living life banging who he wants... I don't know why you have to prove I wasn't enough for him and lost... I already know I wasn't that's why I chose to leave.. and that's why I am the only one hurt... I won't put him down but that's all there is to it... So please don't write back there is nothing to say at this point lol...

[red324]

@Vegasrunner 2-3 weeks per girl then I move to the next one

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Stop it. U literally put in writing that u were rejected. You're only switching up now because u want to argue. Making assumptions based on what you say? That's called information and its the only way people make decisions. You dumped him yet u know how's he's spending his time? U sound pathetic, and this proves that women will do anything to salvage their ego. You weren't enough because most women aren't enough w/out offering sex. No man w/ options spend his time around women platonically as u just proved. I hope men read this so they can understand how narcissistic women like u can be. Here's what really happened. U liked a guy out of your league, some dumb ass bitter single friend of yours told u that to keep him u have to make him wait. U listened to that loser friend but the guy didn't respond how she told u he would so u gave him an ultimatum. He then told u to kick rocks and u couldn't believe it, now your bitter because he didn't think your special. U think u can replace him but like most women u don't understand relationships so u haven't found anyone to make u "feel" like he did. So your left to lying and name-calling. Women always believe their so unique when really they're all very similar.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner That couldn't be farther from the truth LOL Literally nothing happened like that or was even close to that context.. but I ain't going to tell you the full story because I don't even want to talk about this anymore... You are a 45 year old man trying to convince me that I am apparently narcissistic because I didn't put out for a guy that wouldn't date me... LOL cuz that makes sense on any planet... It was a situationship, where he is treating me like a girlfriend without the title so he still has the freedom to fuck who he wants... Yes I told him I didn't want to see him anymore, but you can't really dump a guy that you weren't dating lol and he said there's the door... So yes I dumped him but he didn't care.. why you acting like I'm lying? that is all it was and all it is...
The thing I don't get is why you keep coming at me in an aggressive manner and trying to prove me wrong on a situation you were not apart of.. I also find It really disgusting how you view women as nothing but sex objects to men and that we have no other value... Yet you still think that you are better and smarter than me... considering you have 10 years on me I would expect better... And I don't think I can replace him that is why it still hurts... but obviously there is always more fish in the sea so it doesn't hurt to try...
PS I know you wanna fuck me but get off my ass 😂🤣😘

[Vegasrunner]

@red324 That's better than I assumed, my apologies. That should be the maximum time frame. My only question is, what is the women doing that leads u to believe she's not putting in the same effort?

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Go read the start of this convo.
ME: How many times have you been rejected by a man u like? You: Only once by a man I really loved. Hard to lie in writing. You're a narcissist because u believe that a man should waste his time w/ you when you aren't bringing any value to him. U didn't dump anyone, if the guy would have stopped having sex w/ other women u would still be w/ him. Like most women your insecure and just like 2 argue, you originally tried to prove to me that that counts as rejection, but once u realized u couldn't get any sympathy from me u switched it up to pretend as if u dumped him. U think it's "aggressive" because u believe u can talk to men any way u want and their just supposed to accept it. That probably works because most guys don't tell women the uncomfortable truth. I don't care about your feelings or how hurt u are I'm simply responding to a statement u posted on a public forum. "Better" is subjective, however based on tangible metrics, Income, education level, social status, career, etc, It sounds like I'm way ahead of u. Smart people see multiple POV's u can only see yours so that speaks for itself. What u "expect" is for me to feel sorry for u and tell u its all the guys fault and u did nothing wrong. U should find a male girlfriend for that, I just call it how it is. If there's more fish in the see why are u the one posting about how hurt u are, while he's moved on to quality women? PS:Even u inherently understand that sex is the only value u bring which is why out of nowhere u want to pretend I would remotely be interested in some random women online, but u need to say that to make yourself feel some kind of validation after I've humiliated u just like the guy did.

[Anemone978]

@Vegasrunner I know what I wrote...
I left so not to be wasting any more time, so that counts as me dumping him, he wasn't gonna tell me to leave we were alright until I wanted to go but it was rejection because he obviously didn't care... I am not lying you are just dramatic. So I am narcissist because I believe he should give me what he said he would for me to be wasting my time with him, and I am just supposed to shut up and waste my time with him when he also doesn't bring any value to me?
That doesn't make any sense? If anyone would change what they are doing wrong in a relationship no one would break up, LOL So that means no one has ever broke up because if they were different they would still be together.
Of course I am insecure and like to argue, but so do you because you keep coming back to fight and put me down more each time... No I don't need your sympathy I was just trying to paint a clearer picture for you of what went down... but clearly you don't like what I have said and instead want to tell me what happened when you weren't even there. No it's aggressive because you keep telling me what happened, saying how I feel, and because I feel a curtain way I am doing so and so. because all women are exactly the same and have the same brain...
Yes because you are so much better than most guys and you won't stand for a women to talk to you the same way you talk to them LOL. You maybe way ahead of me for money but not maturity you are the same level as me, that is why you are even having this discussion with me. If you were more mature you would of just moved on.
"Smart people see multiple POV's u can only see yours" lmao that is gold coming from you who only sees your own point of view.

[Anemone978]

Again I was not expecting that, stop assuming what I expect or want from you, I only answered a question to see where you were going with it, but I walked into a stupid argument with you for no reason... You say you tell it like it is but really you don't, you just tell it from your point of view because you have a dislike for women for whatever reason...
You don't read anything I say do you you just spin it into how you want to portray it, yes I'm hurt but I still hope to find an actual good person for me who we will love and fulfil each other. You keep saying he moved on to quality women when he is just sleeping with hoes from the club, but am I supposed to care about that or be jealous, he doesn't love them either? PS.. Sex has no value, you can get sex anywhere it is free for the taking it means nothing in this day and age, the only thing that has value is the person, their personality and compatibility... No you are mistaken in my motives once again.. I say it because it is funny and I like to make you dislike me further for my own entertainment...
No, to humiliate me you would have to prove me 100% wrong and I would actually have to give a shit about what you are saying...
But I know how you just love to have the last word, and I was taught to respect my elders, so I won't respond to your next post... Good day sir.

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 What you "wrote" is that u were rejected you only switched up once u realized I wouldn't give u any sympathy, so you're attempting to save face by claiming u "dumped him" You're narcissistic because u fail to realize u also don't bring any value to him. At least u admitt you're insecure, I enjoy a healthy debate and discussing these topic which is one of the things that has made me successful w/ women. If you feel "put down" that unfortunate but I challenge u to find anywhere wher I have name called or insulted u directly. Challenging your POV is not putting u down, it's just that women rarely have it challenged by men so they don't know how to handle it. What I "like" is irrelevant I'm simply responding to what u say. This is another female trait. YOU don't like it so your attempting to attribute your discomfort to me, proof being I've never mentioned anything about anyone having "the sane brain" Yes, most guys are afraid 2 stand up for themselves because their afraid of dealing w/ women behaving how u are rn. The fact that u believe maturity has to do w/ ignoring someone's POV proves that you're immature. Not only do I see all POV's I can easily articulate yours. You believe that this man should have provided u w/ a relationship under the condition that he could only have sex w/ u. He was supposed to make this decision w/out having sex w/ u first. So essentially u wanted w/ was valued by you b4 providing to him what is valued by him. You POV is pretty standard.

[Vegasrunner]

@anemone978 Lol, can we take a moment to laugh that in one sentence u criticize assumptions and then make an assumption in the next? I've literally made a living off helping women, so not sure how anyone could present evidence that I dislike anyone. Obviously your jealous or u wouldn't even know who he was sleeping w/. Sex is free for u, but men have to have provide value in order to get sex, so the fact that he is sleeping w/ a lot of women validates that he brings value. You're just proving your not unique, as u can simply go through my comments on GAG to see how many women pretend that I want 2 F*** them, simply because they can't hold a civil debate. Humiliation would come from any observer who reads this conversation as your inconsistencies, hypocrisy and immaturity is obvious.

[itsalyssaagain]

Girl you’re dating someone who likes to party. This is part of the package. I’m sorry but I’m being real with you. He likely comes home and he’s exhausted.

[Asker]

How about when he's been unreachable since last night? He called around 11 pm yesterday and I could tell he was on drugs. Apart from that, things been going good between us.

[itsalyssaagain]

I think it’s just part of the package really. That’s his lifestyle

[coachTanthony]

He's with a chick more than likely. He might start out with his friends but probably ends up back at her house.

[OlderAndWiser]

Have you ever been invited to his home? Do you know where he lives?

[Asker]

We're long distance, live in different countries, but he visits me every month or so

[OlderAndWiser]

This pattern suggests a strong possibility that he is living with a female and can only talk to you when he is away from home. Why don't you suggest that you come visit him and see how he responds.

[Asker]

Oh no no, there's nothing like that.

I meant, when he goes out drinking with his friends, he's unreachable until the next day.

[OlderAndWiser]

Did you start out living in the same city and then it became LDR, or have you always been LDR? What's the longest amount of time you have spent together continuously?

[Asker]

We've always been LDR.

2 months

[OlderAndWiser]

Two months is long enough that he should feel some obligations to you. Have you asked him why he is sometimes incommunicado?

[Asker]

Yes, he always has some excuse. I got drunk, fell asleep. Says he's sorry then does it again. Last night he was at this birthday party, called me and I could tell he was on drugs. He's been unreachable since then.

[OlderAndWiser]

Do you use the same drugs he uses?

[Asker]

Absolutely not. What does that have to do with my question though?

[OlderAndWiser]

Do you want the father of your future children to be a chronic drug user?

[Asker]

You got a point there. He's not a chronic user tho, but from time to time, he does cocaine.

[OlderAndWiser]

Do you want a boyfriend for fun now or for building a future together? If you are looking for a future husband, you need to evaluate this guy very carefully. Is this the best you can ever hope to do?

[OlderAndWiser]

Here's the ultimate question: If you had children and then you died when they were still small children, could you trust him to be a responsible parent and do a good job finishing their upbringing?

[midnightmoon05]

it always amazes me when they just disappear in the middle of a discussion.

[Ms_Facesitter]

@midnightmoon05 solid point there.

[LickwidSkie]

I would never date someone that parties like that. Even if he's not cheating, you're still not his priority. In my opinion, your time would be better spent finding a man that treats you like you're more important than anything.

[MementoMori777]

Ask him why he is so unreachable when he is reachable

[Ms_Facesitter]

You talk to him about it and set clear rules and if he breaks them, you end the relationship.

[Drumlin2001]

I assume he let's you know when he's going out? What's the issue?

[Crankor]

What do you mean? Do you feel neglected or do you not hang out or...

[Asker]

Neglected yes. It also feels disrespectful, cause we're long distance.

[Crankor]

Ah, yah long distance Def needs more communication than a regular. I stand by my saying, you make time for what's important to you. It could be he doesn't feel he has anything to say, I don't know what your conversations are like. I'd bring it to his attention and see if he's willing to work something out. It's also possible he's using you to fill a hole till he finds someone closer.

[Asker]

We're in contact all day, update each other etc... But whenever he goes out, he doesn't text back. Last night he was at this party, called and I could tell he was on drugs and has been unreachable since then.

I have. He always has an excuse for it. Apart from this problem, whenever we meet everything is okay.

[Crankor]

Well if you contact each other each day then I don't see it a big deal if he doesn't when he's out. If you thiks he's doing drugs n such, that's a different matter really. You could request he just say goodnight or something at the end of each day if you think that would help.

[Asker]

He does, except when he's out.

[Crankor]

does that bother you?

[Asker]

Absolutely.

[Crankor]

For what reasons If you don't mind me asking?

[Asker]

Because I'm worried he might be up to no good.

[Crankor]

If that's what he wants to do then it's going to happen regardless. Talking to him more won't change it much. That's something you agreed to accept of him when you started a relationship with him isn't it?

[Asker]

It shows some kind of commitment. Is it me or we're talking about 2 different things? Sorry.

I mean, him not texting back when he goes out.

[Mayo503]

Well hope he had a good night….
And when you go out you can do the same to them
Hope that works for you

[PatriceONeal]

Stick it out for 7 years them blame him for waating your time even though you're an adult free to leave at amytime? I don't know just spitballin

[Anonymous]

Have a life outside this obviously not serious, casual thing.

[NostalgiaSenpi]

Tell him you're tired of him not responding and to respond. If not, end it.

[TallAnon]

Ask him to change and if he does not, you break up.

[Danael31]

Nothing? Doesn't he have the right to go out and enjoy his night?

[MyLifeIsAbeauty93]

It means you should let him have fun with his friends and family?

[Anonymous]

Ditch him if the relationship isn’t good. Duh girl Jesus

[spartan55]

Why does he have to be reachable 24/7?

[midnightmoon05]

what makes him your boyfriend?

[Iron_Man]

Ask him where is he going?

[ThomasDavid1989]

Get a new boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

I don’t think he’s your boyfriend anymore lol

[Zayed_]

He cheated.

[Anonymous]

he doesn't love you