So, I've been chatting with someone just over a month now. And our convos have been wholesome, we take turns asking some "get to know you" type questions. We've found common grounds, and seem to find more each time we chat. We haven't met in person yet, but there's already been mention of that to come in the future.
My head is going up in the clouds n I need some guidance on how to stay grounded. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'd LOVE to be in a relationship with someone safe. But I'm literally fresh out of a toxic abusive relationship with narcissist abuser, and even tho I mentally/emotionally checked out of that years ago, I've only physically been out just a few months, and I'm not fully disconnected yet. I've made him aware of my predicament.
Plus I still gotta put myself in therapy to declutter the mental mess I've endured from the abuse. I don't feel it's right to go hurting someone else cuz I'm not "together" in my mental state.
I also don't Wana fall in love with "the idea of falling in love", cuz that was my mistake the last time. And I gotta admit, I'm SO curious about this guy and I feel kinda dumb n naïve for it all, since he's basically still a digital figment of my imagination, per sé.
Go to therapy first before entering a relationship. Most likely if you haven't learned from your past abusive relationship, you might end up in another one without noticing first. Secondly don't just jump into a relationship and date for a longer time, like I don't know 6-9 months and then if everything is still good, get into a serious relationship.
How do you notice? Well he respects you, your boundaries and is also supportive and truly caring with no bad intentions behind it. You have to take your time to figure out if he is just hiding his true colors or not.
well i spoke to a guy i knew who is now my ex on a dating site for months and he invited me over to his mums house where he lives and the first night we met we slept together so we never got to know each other because knowing what someone is like on a phone and knowing what there like in person is 2 diffrent things
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I agree that in knowing someone online vs in person, the experience is usually quite different.
