Do you have any suggestions for what I can do if I am having difficulty dating?

[TheSimFans]

When it comes after the first date/meetup, it just fizzles out and I'm right back at square one. I've tried going to events in my town, but so far there have been a limited number of men there. Instead, I'm considering going to the city to meet more people. Aside from that, I don't know why some things seem to fizzle out. Getting attracted to many men isn't easy for me. Any red flag I see with some men turns me off. There are some men who make excuses for being too busy, talking too much, or being in more than one relationship at the same time. Men don't approach me often, but I don't want to be approached by men I don't want., I have also been approached by men and be rejected more than once. i also got a baby face to. How can I solve my dating problems?

[ProbablyClueless]

It sounds like your problem comes down to communicating your interest.

I can give you a little perspective on this, as a fairly assertive man; timid women absolutely bore me. They are boring people to go on dates with. They don't express their interest, they don't express any of who they are as people; they give me absolutely NOTHING connect with them on. If you don't effectively communicate to me that you want me and give me something to connect with, I'm not going to take any kind of chance in pursuing you.

Why would I take the risk if I don't know whether you're receptive or not? If you were talking with someone and asked them a question, and they gave you a non-answer; would you assume that they wanted to keep talking about that thing? No. You'd probably think oh, he/she didn't answer my question. I'm going to talk about something else that they respond better to. And if they gave you enough non-answers, you would just stop talking to them altogether because you would eventually assume that they just weren't down. There is nothing more uncomfortable than forcing a conversation.

[TheSimFans]

@probablycluelessI can communicate proppler that is not the isuse. just fizzle out after first date. i'm always honset about what i'm want. so nowhere is communicate is not the promble then what is. my baby face is my promblem then

[TheSimFans]

problem

[ProbablyClueless]

I feel like I could have explained this better in my answer. Just because you are explicitly stating what you want doesn't mean you are feeding into the chemistry of the relationship.

[TheSimFans]

@ProbablyClueless then what is then. i had no problem when i was in college and gradution from colllege.

[ProbablyClueless]

It could be that the men you're dating are just less willing to be patient as they've gotten older. I know that I put up with way less than I would have before. It's not even that I know what I want better (although I do), I just really don't feel like dating women who aren't excited enough about me to show a basic level of enthusiasm.

[TheSimFans]

I dated or be in relationship with more yonuger men then i have with any older men but i always get ethusiam. so is men are the problem then doesn't matter what age they are then.

[ProbablyClueless]

No, the men are not the problem. You have to make an effort to express enthusiasm back. That's what I'm trying to tell you. That's how dating as an adult works. You have to make people feel like you want to be around them.

[TheSimFans]

yet i do put ethusiam back and yet they don't give back or just ghost me. so what again.

[ProbablyClueless]

Then it's probably something about your personality. I don't know. I don't know you as a person and I don't know the men you're trying to date.

[TheSimFans]

I don't see anything wrong about my personailty at all. what else then. is my baby face is isuse then. i'm not trying to date any men so far.

[ProbablyClueless]

Of course you don't think anything is wrong with your personality; it's your personality. Relationships require two people though, so your opinion about your personality is only one half of that equation.

[TheSimFans]

I have ask other people about my personality and they say is okay and i'm friendly and nice, honset. these also what i got on some dating apps. so again is not my personality then. what is again.

[ProbablyClueless]

Again; very few people are going to feel comfortable telling you that your personality is an issue. I"m trying to be honest, helpful, and cordial with you.

Based solely on the interaction I'm having with you now, I think the problem is communication, like I stated above. You don't seem to be receptive to my comments; it's like they go in one ear and out the other.

[TheSimFans]

again with communication, i already been okay at it. i can talk to my older sister friends ok and can talk to some friends when i volteerring. so again i don't thinks is communication that is isuse.

[TheSimFans]

volteering

[ProbablyClueless]

And what I'm telling you is that you wouldn't necessarily recognize it, if it was a communication issue. Communication is a two-way street. Even if you're a great communicator, there will still be miscommunications if the other person isn't on the same wavelength as you.

You say you're okay at communication, but that skill level is not coming through in this conversation. There's this huge disconnect between the way you and I are trying to communicate ideas right now, and the only reason we're making progress is because despite you repeatedly not connecting with the point of what I'm saying, I have continued to try to rephrase it because I genuinely want to help improve your relationships.

[TheSimFans]

yes, i know that t communication is two way streets but i still i'm communication with other people just fine. so again what is this times. i already meation in my other qestion that got a learning disabitily and been talking to a few people just fine.

[ProbablyClueless]

I don't know about other questions you've asked; your profile is on private. Communication of romantic interests is totally different from communication of other ideas. A lot of people struggle with effectively communicating romantic interests and intentions.

[TheSimFans]

I was fine with both frienship and romantic relationship when i did had in past and my communication is be okay with both friendship and romace onces. maybe is my baby face. then what is.

[ProbablyClueless]

You were fine... back before the men you're trying to date grew up. THAT'S WHAT I'M TELLING YOU. Times have changed. Your technique has to change too. It has nothing to do with your face.

[Bricealan]

At 24, I would not be overly concerned about that. Just because you are very selective, does not make you un-datable. Stay the course, and don't agonize over it. Relax, enjoy your young years.