How to tell a guy you want to be more than friends with benefits?

Question

Mr_twoface · Accepted Answer

I believe communication is key in any relationship, and expressing your feelings honestly is the first step towards building a deeper connection. Stay true to yourself and your needs, and trust that the right person will respect and appreciate your honesty. Maybe find a private and comfortable setting where you both have the time and can talk openly without distractions and begin by expressing appreciation for your friendship and the time you've spent together. Thereafter, gently transition into expressing your desire for something more meaningful. You can say something like, "I've really enjoyed our time together, and I value our friendship a lot. Lately, I've been thinking about what I want in a relationship, and I realize that I'm looking for something deeper and more committed than just being friends with benefits."

Ultimately, be honest about your feelings and what you're looking for in a relationship. Let him know why you think you could be a good fit together beyond just physical attraction. Explain what you envision for the future of your relationship and what you're hoping to get out of it emotionally.

Rooting for you guys ;)

TommyMountainFigure · Accepted Answer

By asking him outright if he is happy with the way things are. If he says no, ask him what would help?
If of course he says yes, say never mind then.. and KEEP saying never mind until the point where he is on his knees wanting to know..
THEN you can say, look I didn't want to bring it up because we have a deal and I don't want there to be any wideness between us, but seeing as you asked.. I would like us to be exclusive, and you clearly don't so forget I said anything.
After that, pretend as if you never mentioned it. it's now the elephant in the room he will address and hopefully for you, it goes in your favour.

cyberland · Accepted Answer

Navigating from friends with benefits to something more can definitely be tricky, but it's great that you're ready to open up about your feelings. You might start the conversation by expressing how much you enjoy the time you spend together and then gently shift into how you've started to feel about him.

You could say something like, "I've been really enjoying our time together and I've started to feel like I want something more than just being friends with benefits.

But if he doesn't, try to be understanding and decide if you're okay with continuing the current arrangement or if it might be healthier to step back.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

He has to want more in the first place. Too often women go along with this arrangement thinking it will pay off and turn into something more when sex is only what he’s offering.

Ms_Facesitter · Accepted Answer

You just tell him word for word. But I think the chance will be small. You never know, it could work, depending on how you interacted with him besides sex.

Finchie40 · Answer

Tell him , make it clear to him that you only want him and no one else. He will either give you a yes or a No answer , if he says No, than you are best to move on

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Why does he think that you want to be a friends with benefits?

coachTanthony · Answer

No benefits is how but now it’s a bit too late

MrOracle · Answer

You say the words. But know going in that there's a greater than 90% chance that it will end your relationship with him.

What you need to understand is that a friends with benefits is NOT a step on the path to a relationship - it's a completely different path heading in a different direction, and usually there is no path between the two. If you want a relationship with a man, you must start with that requirement from the very beginning, or you have very little chance of it happening. Being friends with benefits reduces, not increases, your chances of being in a relationship with that man. Yes, there are rare exceptions, but the odds are incredibly stacked against you.

I know that's not what you want to hear, but it's the truth, and you should be prepared for it, and realize that YOU, not he, are the one violating the friends with benefits agreement by wanting more. Do not blame him.

mobiusforniner · Answer

Like, he actually cares about you more than a booty call? Actually remembers things you like or don’t like. Makes an effort to impress not just you, but maybe your parents or family. Chances are however, he’s not doing any of those things and you’re asking here hoping for some obvious sign he sees you as someone more than a wet piece of meat.

if he doesn’t do any of those things above and worse, just hits you up when he wants some; and you’re hoping for more, I recommend you cut your losses and find a man who values and loves you

Radiate143 · Answer

If he already is... he doesn't. You've been put in sperm release category already. It's essentially impossible to get out of. Men resent investing more for something they got at a discpunt previously. Men judge women harshly and give us pretty much zero second chances while they expect us to always bend our rules for them.

PeachyPie93 · Answer

You just tell him, but be prepared for him to make excuses as to why he can't. Never fuck a guy for free they almost never will date you afterwards.

Anonymous · Answer

Bit too late for that. He's already riding in the ride he wants. You get what you want, and he's getting what he wants, with none of the risk. Now you're gonna ask him to make an additional investment, with no additional benefits to him that he's already getting? If he's got even the brainpower of a goose, his response will be ehhhh😏😏I don't think so. We're doing just fine now.😉

slatyb · Answer

What do you want? What does "more than" mean to you? A partnership? Marriage? Children? Whatever it is, ask for that. Think about what you will do if he doesn't want the same.

Alice18 · Answer

Guys are a bit stupid, they don't understand hints. It is better to find a good moment and talk about it directly, or do it)

Nikki1989 · Answer

You just be upfront, honest and tell him.

laly520 · Answer

ig its too late starting a friends with benefits bond with him has already ruined any potentioal relationship, if there even was a one

sage2021 · Answer

He prepared for him to say that's not what he wants.

CriticalCatDad · Answer

These days the way women treat men he won't want to be anything other than fuck buddies

KrakenAttackin · Answer

You should have done that before becoming a fuck buddy. It's hard for a guy to see a fuck buddy as anything but a hoe.

Pohjolan · Answer

You just tell him. Anyway why get into a friends with benefits arrangement if that's not what you desire?

handsomelad70 · Answer

Sound him out about furthering your relationship.

jahaims · Answer

If you can let a guy inside you but have a hard time bringing that up you should go to therapy.

dinojames22 · Answer

Tell me directly (but not right after we have sex, I never trust a first "I love you" during or right after sex).

Anonymous · Answer

By telling him so, trying saying it during sex.

QuietRunner · Answer

just tell him 95% of straight guys say yes

Anonymous · Answer

I wish I could find friends with benefits like that 😕

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

It’s A Little Late!

XXTruthfulOgrexx · Answer

By being honest.

DishLady · Answer

You don’t. You move on.

Truthatanycost · Answer

It won't matter how you tell him...

WhitneySnow · Answer

Directly. Just come out and tell him.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

All you can do is just say it.

KrisKris81 · Answer

"I want to be more than friends with benefits"

dustybiker2 · Answer

With honesty.

MasterKS · Answer

You are mature jut be open!

itsclearlynicholas · Answer

Oh snap 🙄🫰🏻 lol

Anonymous · Answer

sit on hos lap, he will understand

In_Trance · Answer

Ask him

eagle1951 · Answer

beats me

How to tell a guy you want to be more than friends with benefits?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

When a guy says he wants to be friends with benefits?

How to tell a guy you want to be more than friends with benefits?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

When a guy says he wants to be friends with benefits?

We're glad to see you liked this post.