What does it mean when a girl says she'll let you know asap when she's free to go on a date?

[expet]

My friend's flirt told him she would let him know when she was free so they could go on a date. He is excited but it feels like it is a hidden rejection to me. I cannot tell this to my friend because I don't want him to get sad but I also don't want to hide it. Do you think what I feel is right? Should I tell him?

[angels]

When a girl says she'll let you know as soon as possible (ASAP) when she's free to go on a date, it generally indicates that she's interested but currently has a busy schedule or some other commitments that are occupying her time. Here's a breakdown of what this might mean based on my experience:

The fact that she's willing to set a date and not outright decline suggests she's interested in getting to know you better. She values the potential of a date but might be dealing with time constraints. It's possible that she genuinely has a hectic agenda, such as work, studies, or prior commitments with friends and family. She may need some time to figure out her availability. By saying she'll let you know ASAP, she's showing consideration for your interest and not leaving you in the dark. It's a positive sign that she wants to keep the communication open. This response allows for flexibility in planning the date. It gives her the chance to check her schedule and propose a time that works for both of you. It's essential to maintain open and respectful communication. You can express understanding of her busy schedule and let her know you're looking forward to hearing from her when she's free.

In this situation, patience and understanding are key. She might be genuinely interested, but life can be hectic at times. Give her the space and time she needs to figure out her schedule, and when she does get back to you, it's an opportunity to plan a date that suits both of your timetables.

[Anonymous]

A friend of mine is a decent looking woman - not overly attractive but she makes up for it in bucketfuls by her caring, heart of gold personality.

She's only dated 3 men in her life

2 both decent respectable guys went out of their way to make time for her.

One, as back in her youth she was sharing a car with her brother, even said he'd give her his old car so she could travel easier.

.

The 3rd one
Some of the first few things he said to her was about her older pictures - he'd seen via a mutual friend - only a few years ago. She gained about 40lbs during COVID working in medical 80 hours a week. She's not obese, she's just a little plumper.

He has shown little interest in meeting - in fact the 1 time she asked if she could come to his town so they could go to a resturant he said... yeah maybe in a couple weeks.

.

In short when someone isn't willing to give you their time, they're not interested.

Maybe if your friend is attractive she'll keep him around for entertainment - aka a causal fling when she's got nothing better to do - but nothing beyond that.

[Ozanne]

If someone is really into someone, they'll make time, or can't wait to make the time. I've got a guy friend who told me once he would have been willing to take a knitting class if it meant being closer to the girl he wanted to go out with. People will just make it happen if they want it to. To say "I'll let you know" is a bit stupid. Most of us know what our week looks like. Especially if it's for something small like a quick coffee date. If there was someone irresistible, I'm sure the answer would be to tell them instantly the nights or days they have available. When you can't wait to see someone, often times people will even break plans with others just to go out with the person they prefer.

[Anonymous]

How old is this woman? If she’s past 30 saying then tell your friend to run for the hills. Reason being is a grown ass woman should know better then to do such pathetic lying bs.

It is rejection. Period. While I feel sorry for your friend I also think if he’s close to our age he should know better by now. That is the oldest excuse in the book and it’s usually women in their early 20s saying this shit. But a grown woman saying that? Tell your friend to delete her number and ignore her asap. Reason being is her lying like that is disrespectful.

When you are interested in some one you will alway make time. Even if they are working 80 hours a week or something they will speak up saying “truth is I am extremely busy but I want to go on date. Let’s figure something out”. When women like you they help you. The real reason she is “busy“ is because there is most likely another guy in the picture she likes more. She wants to keep her schedule open for him.

[soulOnDisplay]

Women do not have the assertiveness to tell men how they actually feel. Your friend will be in the grave before he actually see's her. In other words, she's "busy" because she has better things to do than make time for your bud. Although I do hope I am wrong.

[ManOnFire]

I agree with what you think. The moment I read your question my thought was that she was lying to ghost him. Yeah, I think you should tell him. Just be like, "I don't know, man. I get a weird feeling that she's ghosting you."

[Summeroflove]

As long as she makes effort to go on a date. She may be busy. If she seems like she’s intentionally stalling. She’s too much of a coward to say how she really feels.

[Changiis07]

Maybe wait it out she could be busy with school, family or work lots of things so give it some time

[Avicenna]

It may be a rejection or it may be keeping him around as an orbiter

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

She might really be busy.

[ShadezMcgee]

Bottom line, unless the woman gives an enthusiastic yes, it is a no. Your boy is about to learn some tough stuff.

Women that are interested in meeting men they like will move heaven and earth to spend time with them regardless if they are busy.

[CatVader]

1. She is already taken, are in a complicated relationship and you are on the wheel for when she might be free.
2. She is letting you down without confrontation.
3. She is actually busy and need some time.

yea don't hold high expectations, that's probably the worst you can do to yourself in such a situation.

[Anonymous]

She's allowed to delay it once or twice, since consent to a date is what really matters. But I wouldn't press the issue, just let her be. If she really cares about going on a date, she'll get back with him on it.
But it just smells like a rejection to me, and that's fine, too, hopefully she means exactly what she says and didn't feel the need to make an excuse. Hopefully things go well, whether they end up together or peacefully move on somehow.

[jeffend888]

It means she has zero intention of going on a date with you and she's simply kicking the can down the road hoping you'll forget or get distracted by something else or go hook up with someone else.

Now I don't blame women for this, it's hard sometimes to reject a man to his face or even through text. Some men do not take rejection amicably so women use these kinds of tactics.

TL;DR - yes this is hidden rejection.

[Singing_Hollow]

It means she is seeing if anything better comes around and if not then she will go with you. Im sorry but if someone wants to see you and date you they will make the time.

[whirled_up_girl]

I would guess it means she'll let you know as soon as she knows when the best time is to go on a date.

[Paris13]

Keep Still for Now. She may Be Busy or Working and Trying to Clear Her Calendar. However, My Advice? If She is making Nonstop Excuses, Sure mention Gently She is a No GO!! xxoo

[Anonymous]

Anything but an enthusiastic yes from a woman is typically a no. Now it's entirely possible that she really is busy and will get back to him. But it's probably more likely he'll be waiting forever. In other words, your friend should be looking elsewhere. If she gets back to him soon, cool beans! But it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world for her to get woken up to the fact that when you put a guy on hold you can and will lose him to another woman.

[no_feet_pics]

It means she's not interested. She knows when she's free, and if she likes you, she will make herself free.

[EricSummer]

It means that she does not want him to ask her again. In case she wants to go out with him she will let him know. Typically, this time never comes.

[Billlewis]

That's Latin for, 'If I find myself with nothing else to do on a Friday or Saturday night, I may decide to give you a call'.

[ItsChloe1999]

I’ve said this so many times to guys I’ve put in the friend zone. Your friend has been rejected. It’s probably best to tell him.

[Adaeva]

It is rejection. Would she say that, if by chance a movie star asked her? You know she wouldn't.

[Fromdusktilldawn]

yea, this is not only girls saying that but also peers. Happens to me a lot, its always a no. Saying, they'll tell me when they are free, means 100 percent, they'll never tell you and dont want to meet up.

[lightbulb27]

she's pmsing or busy or not sure…give time and follow up.

[katiesmuff]

Probably that you are not going to hear from her!

[SassyAussieAddy]

If she really likes you she will make time to see you.

[spartan55]

I had that one used on me several times, he's getting blown off. Keep quiet, he'll learn.

[Blueeyes81]

It's a way to buy time without having to answer. The answer is no 95% of the time, she is hoping that he'll take the hint when she doesn't reply.

[Mangospacho]

It means she’s seeing someone else or she is interested in someone else and is waiting to see how that pans out. You are basically waitlisted but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

[tzdc21]

It means more than likely he won't get a response.

[slatyb]

That's a complete non-answer. Sounds like "no" to me. He should date other people.

[ohmyguy]

damn dude your hung up on 'a s a p"
Google it

relax your top priority material for her now

[skt19d]

I think 'we' respondents should reframe from what if answers. It's like answering a question with a question.

I think this question deserves a poll.

[Likes2drive]

It means he’s not really a priority for her to make plans with so unless she has absolutely nothing to do is when she might call him

[zagor]

Most likely a polite rejection. Unless she really is horrendously busy, as say a doctor in their residency would be.

[love_conquers_lust]

Pursue other girls. She isn’t ready, so let her be.

[Anonymous]

You should definitely tell him the truth which is she's probably not interested.

[JohnSmityJohnson]

It means that you should move on and find someone else. Don't waste your time.

[RingOfFire]

Sounds along the same lines as "Don't call me, I'll call you."

[boobliker]

tell him the truth it's better comming now than two weeks down the road

[In_Trance]

It means she's never going to let you know when she's free to go on a date

[shades777]

she dont have the money and waiting till she can afford a date

[DreamLife7]

It means what she said. I don't know understand what you're not comprehending?

[grega239]

It means you should stop wasting your time on her

[JesseP1nk]

I take it as "Wait till i date and bang other guys, now be a good doggy"

[KrakenAttackin]

It means she is feeling out her other options before giving you a date.

[dolemite58]

she’s not interested, if a girls really into you she’ll break plans to make time for you.

[strateguy632]

i suspect she was gently rejected him.

[exitseven]

Tell him not to hold his breath

[Nikki1989]

Seems pretty self-explanatory, doesn't it?

[Jkgordon]

Basically what it means

[Friendlybro79]

Mind your business lol

[gorydetails]

It means she’s not interested in him.

[Christoff92]

Trying to overcome her ex

[Iron_Man]

Only time will tell

[Jerre]

I would forget about dating her.

[krin_m]

Just that she is not free right now?

[Anonymous]

she's lying and she's not intrested

[justabuddy]

85 present of the time it's an easy rejection.

[Anonymous]

On to the next one

[Sugarberry37]

waiting