I get it I get it “date whoever you want”. I’m 22 I don’t have any kids I’ve only ever had one boyfriend so I’m not far in the dating game 😅. I met this guy really sweet compliments me a lot and I actually liked how he is so I decided why not let’s give it a try. We’re talking for a little bit and he posts on his story he has a kid probably around 6-7 years old. So that kinda left me like ooo idkkk because I’ve never been with someone with kids before. I know that usually comes with drama and stuff so I have no idea if I should continue talking to this guy, trust me he’s cool I like him but I know women who have kids and they’re “broken up” with their child’s father and the father of the kid is always going to have love for the baby mother or at least try to hookup with her. So that kinda has me out off I seen it happen soooo many times that I’m like ugh I should stay out the mess but I do enjoy his company.
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Not knowing the situation between the father and the baby mother, I can only speculate the love part you refer to only extends to hoping nothing happens to her, because she's your child's mother. Obviously, he wouldn't want anything to happen to her that would give his son grief. That's if they separated on good terms.
If things did not go well, then things can get pretty emotional/ugly when both the parents see each other during the exchange every couple of weeks, or so. Not good for the son and kind of sucks for you to get in between their squabbles.
So there's a lot to think about when dating someone with a son or daughter.
That’s where I think it gets tricky usually there’s unfinished business and the baby’s mother tries to start drama and I honestly don’t know their situation because again I’m freshly talking to him but of course I would not want to bring excess hurt to the child because the child is not responsible for their parents relationship. I would never want to hurt any child ever, if anything I’d try to make the child’s life easier. I like him but it seems like a lot for someone like me since I never been in anything like this before and I myself am young too
I’m not going to blame the child’s mother either since I don’t know her and again I don’t know what happened so I can’t speak on it. I’m only speaking on what I’ve seen with other relationships similar to this one
You are right to be apprehensive about the situation, it's a lot to manage.
I mean, I'd be more concerned about whether you're interested in being there for the kid. Because if you do like and date this guy, you're gonna become significant to that kid.
If you're not up to that, don't date him.
It’s still fresh though, it’s inappropriate for me to try and shove myself into the child’s life this soon. Obviously if things workout and we’re in it for the long run I would be. The child isn’t the problem, the tie between a child’s father and a Child’s mother is what is the problem. Usually there’s unfinished business so I’m on the fence of even trying something.
Agreed, it's not just the father's feelings she has to worry about. I would say, if she's not up to the challenges of dating a guy with a son, then maybe best to let it go.
I mean, I don't think you're ready, Asker, to be dating a father if your concern is "baby daddy might run back to baby mommy" more than "will I be able to live with this kid if our relationship goes somewhere".
If you can't move past a trust issue about his ex wife - whom he'll likely need to continue to be involved with in some capacity for the sake of his child - then don't date him.
You will only bring more stress to both the dad and his kid. They don't deserve that.
No not at all
Yea I’m thinking about it and I feel like I’m not set for this 😭 it’s unfortunate I did like talking to him oh well
There are many cute guys with no baggage that are fun to talk too