I have a work friend and we’ve gotten extremely close with each other and I do really like her even though all our values are different. We’ve flirted before but according to her it’s platonic since she’s claimed she’s flirted and made out and stuff with friends from back home.
I swear we have like a romantic vibe but I don’t know because she downplays everything and so do I and I know we shouldn’t go there. Once we were teasing each other about something and she stares at me square in my face without breaking eye contact and is smirking to the point where it made me uncomfortable.
Once I straight up asked her to flirt with me because I was drunk and she called me pretty and said my laugh was cute but later we just agreed to be friends. She’s also repeatedly said I should model and will compliment my hair or a sweater or something if she likes it which I think is normal?
More recently I had a party and her and I drunkenly made out 4 times in my basement which once again she still said she’s done with friends before and she just assumed I did it because I was drunk.
So she just took a trip back to her hometown to visit some friends for the last week. She came back to work a week later and seemed really tired and told me she would tell me everything that happened the next day. I also told her I would tell her some tea that I had and she told me I could just text her right then. I have a crush on this girl from my college and she’s a lesbian and I talk about her all the time so it’s possible my friend assumed it was about her. The next day I started talking about the lesbian girl and my friend immediately told me she hooked up with two guys on her trip and had a new years kiss also. I mentioned how the lesbian girl was so cute and right after I said that my friend was like “I’m going to California in 3 months with friends”.
Recently she told me reconnected with a guy she blocked before and they slept together. Is this bc I’m getting to know the lesbian girl?
I swear we have like a romantic vibe but I don’t know because she downplays everything and so do I and I know we shouldn’t go there. Once we were teasing each other about something and she stares at me square in my face without breaking eye contact and is smirking to the point where it made me uncomfortable.
Once I straight up asked her to flirt with me because I was drunk and she called me pretty and said my laugh was cute but later we just agreed to be friends. She’s also repeatedly said I should model and will compliment my hair or a sweater or something if she likes it which I think is normal?
More recently I had a party and her and I drunkenly made out 4 times in my basement which once again she still said she’s done with friends before and she just assumed I did it because I was drunk.
So she just took a trip back to her hometown to visit some friends for the last week. She came back to work a week later and seemed really tired and told me she would tell me everything that happened the next day. I also told her I would tell her some tea that I had and she told me I could just text her right then. I have a crush on this girl from my college and she’s a lesbian and I talk about her all the time so it’s possible my friend assumed it was about her. The next day I started talking about the lesbian girl and my friend immediately told me she hooked up with two guys on her trip and had a new years kiss also. I mentioned how the lesbian girl was so cute and right after I said that my friend was like “I’m going to California in 3 months with friends”.
Recently she told me reconnected with a guy she blocked before and they slept together. Is this bc I’m getting to know the lesbian girl?
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Sounds like a really complicated situation. A few thoughts:
- Your work friend gives mixed signals for sure. Making out with you but then downplaying it makes it hard to read what she really wants.
- Maybe deep down she does have feelings, but keeps pushing them down because you're close work friends or for some other reason. So she hooks up with other people instead.
- Could be she got jealous hearing you gush about the lesbian girl, so she brought up the guys she was with as a way to make you jealous back. Or show she's not available like that.
- Her reconnecting with that other dude now could totally be a reaction to feeling you drifting towards someone else.
My advice would be distance yourself a bit emotionally from this work friend. Stay polite but don't get too personal or flirty until you can figure out what she truly wants.
See where things go with this lesbian girl too if you really like her. Don't lead either of them on. And be honest with your friend about catching feelings elsewhere if it comes up naturally.
Hope this all works itself out! Just take it slow and trust your gut. Let me know if anything else happens.
Pick one.