Why does older men dating 18 year old women elicit such a strong reaction from people?

[Tim2nice]

Updates

1 y

I have no interest in young adults myself but whenever you see a man older than let’s say 25 dating an 18 year old girl most people will scream “so gross”, he’s a pedophile, etc. If the law allows something what’s the big deal?

[Anonymous]

I think it mainly bothers women. Men not so much. I think it bothers women more because it plays on their emotions. Especially if she can’t find a man, someone passes her up for a younger girl she feels hurt. Women claim they mature faster than men but in situations like this she’s still considered a little child, naive by a majority of women. Which one is it? If that’s the case then should we take the voting rights away from 18 year olds? Should we up the military age to 25, since they’re all still naive, dumb at 18? I mean we’ve raised the drinking age as well as the smoking age but an 18 year old can still die in combat. I think it’s more of an “ick” feeling women get. They never look at it like well maybe the 18 year old is the one interested in older men. We call older women who date younger men “cougars,” so it’s glorified. But to my knowledge there’s no term like that in reference to men who date younger women. If there is a name it’s usually something negative.

[Basement-Bum]

We call them "step dads".

[blueonblack22]

Middle aged women are usually the first to go nuts over this. It’s based on insecurity and frustration they aren’t getting the same attention they used to

It’s funny a 18 year old woman is often considered “a strong young woman” when it’s convenient by these same middle aged women. Especially if these middle women are on the left politically and they see a 18 year old woman being rude to men and speaking her mind.

But the same 18 year suddenly becomes a delicate helpless child if they are dating an older man. The older man is a groomer and pedo now.

[Cheerguy]

So you are fine with middle aged men fucking 18 year old?

[blueonblack22]

@Cheerguy no not really. Yes it does a have a “ick” factor to it. But there are a LOT of things consenting adults do in this world that has a “ick” factor to it but they are adults and can make adult decisions.

If a 18 year old can sign up for the military, get a sex change, etc they can can consent to having sex with any adult regardless of their age.

You can’t cherry pick what’s a legal 18 year old can and can’t do. Unless we want to move the age of consent up to 21. But there are plenty of 18-19 year old women who would defy that all day long because the hottest ones usually want to chase rich/famous men. Many of them want to be “sugar babies”.

[Cheerguy]

I have sex with 18 year olds occasionally and it's rarely for money. Many are just attracted to much older men

[blueonblack22]

@Cheerguy are you saying that to be facetious? You mean 18 year old WOMEN right? If you aren’t jerking my chain then to each his own.

But unless you are Brad Pitt or a Bradley Cooper then I somehow have a hard time believing you. Unless you are a college professor who is grading papers for college freshmen or something.

[Cheerguy]

If you don't believe me then that's your

[Cheerguy]

*problem

[blueonblack22]

@Cheerguy if you can pull that off legitimately (and are not being a sugar daddy) then good for you. But you do mean women, right? If you are doing with 18 year old men then that’s a completely different dynamic. Much different story.

I’m not gay but from I’ve seen there is a ton more “leeway” in that dynamic vs a much older man trying to seduce a 18 year old woman. Also that dynamic has built in cushion because people are more hesitant to criticize gay men because that might be “homophobic”. 18 year old men are much less likely to be considered “delicate victims” by society in comparison to 18 year old women.

An older man trying to seduce a 18 year old woman is walking on a very thin tightrope. Especially if he’s older than 35.

if the 18 year old woman even gets even the slightest feeling of him being “creepy” he’s toast. Many of those young women won’t hesitate to broadcast her negative feelings about him the world too. It only works if she’s completely in on it emotionally.

So again if you are legitimately pulling this off with 18 year old woman at 59 (and you aren’t rich/famous) then you must be one hell of a silver fox. Congrats if that’s the case.

[Cheerguy]

Yes I prefer 18 year old men actually. I only occasionally have sex with women but thanks.

[blueonblack22]

@Cheerguy yep that’s what I thought.

[Rei13]

I think it’s weird when someone significantly older goes for eighteen year olds. It’s not breaking any laws, but it does make me question why he (or she) can’t attract anyone in their own age bracket.

Whenever I was younger I attracted so many creepy men that were old enough to be my dad (or in some cases my grandfather), still get them sometimes but not as much. Now that I’m older I attract men in my age bracket or a lot younger.

[zeitgeist057]

This assumption "why can't (they) attract anyone in their own age bracket" isn't accurate. Many men can have women in a wide variety of age ranges, and *prefer* younger. It's not because they are forced to date younger women, but rather having many options open to them, it's a choice.

Ironic you can see for yourself "Now that (you're) older (you) attract (your) age or a lot younger.", yet can't wrap your head around a man doing the same thing.

[Rei13]

@zeitgeist057 Just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should lol. Still weird when you’re 30+ going for someone barely legal. But really people do what they want and that isn’t the norm anyways

[standardguy]

Well you go for social norms. But you should also take biology in account. Men of all ages are attracted to the most fertile women. That is evolution. And this are the most young women in legal age. So 18 year olds are best matching women.

[dustybiker2]

It's predatory. Taking advantage of and using innocents for personal gain. And this swings both ways with me. Young man or woman. The type of man who does this here on gag, their comments (even in here) speak volumes. 🤮 "I can't manage to find anyone my age with life experience to accept me, they see my flaws, so I manipulate the young." Disgusting.

[Avicenna]

There are always control freak busybodies that want to run other people‘s lives.

I don’t think much older guys dating 18 year olds is something that occurs more than rarely anyway.

[Dinklex3]

Something being legal doesn’t make something less gross, lol.

18 year old are kids in my eyes. I remember feeling disgusted & confused at that age when older men hit on me. I feel grossed out when kids under 25 hit on me and find it confusing when older men do it & take some kind of “pride” in dating a “kid”.

[K4keeps]

I have zero attraction towards an 18 old young man any of them goes for 19, 20,21,22,23, I just see a kid I don't know how far back I would go in age and date but I also don’t think an 18 yr old should vote, if 21 is the age for smoking and alcohol then 18 shouldn’t be for voting. If a man “older man” can be with an 18 yr old then he just wants a girl to get his dick wet, it’s a lust thing cause she’s still new, has no flaws, is there at his beck n call cause she has more energy, doesn’t have things to take care of except herself, so there for her eyes are on him only. I’m not jealous I’m just glad I’m not with someone that would/has done that to me cause it’s a slap in the face really.

[NamerOfStars]

Women don't like it because it's evidence of their own decreasing power to attract men, and men don't because of a combination of envy and unwillingness to "follow the script".

[standardguy]

I think that the 18 year old woman is the only person who has the right to decide if it is gross for her or not. She is an adult and her opinion is that what counts.
Many persons have a wrong concept of relationships between the two sexes. Their think that there must be a same power between partners. But rhis concept is feminist ideology, i. e. wrong.

[Anonymous]

18 is still a TEEN. eighTEEN. and possibly still in high school. if that's not predatory, getting with them because they have literally no experience, no full brain development, young, naïve, can easily get groomed because they have no idea what the signs are, then i don't know what is...

[Tim2nice]

Newsflash!! You can’t groom an adult. The word you’re looking for is manipulate and people of all ages can manipulate

[Opinion Owner]

you actually can groom an adult. look it up. "power differential within a relationship". christ.

[normalice]

It is as though he is dating an 18 year old not because they have anything in common or like each other but because that is the lowest age he could get away with.

[Cheerguy]

Or it could be a fetish

[normalice]

Sorry, but I'm still not interested in trying to make you feel bad for wanting young boys.

[Cheerguy]

You sure tried to

[normalice]

Sorry, but I'm still not interested in trying to make you feel bad for wanting young boys. You will have to satisfy your weird kink elsewhere.

[Cheerguy]

Come on

[normalice]

Sorry, but I'm still not interested in trying to make you feel bad for wanting young men. You will have to satisfy your weird kink elsewhere.

[RavVid]

It raises questions about adult hood if it is considered that 18 is not old enough to make sexual decisions. If an older man s dating an 18 yo that 18 yo has made a sexual decision.

Why do we allow 18 yo's to vote if they don't have the wherewithal to make mature sexual decisions.

[Bricealan]

First off, I question, why an 18 year old would date an "older" man, especially dependent how much older the man was. For me, I would feel like a 'round peg in a square hole' to be in that position. Much older men have nothing in common with an 18 year old.

[Cheerguy]

It can be just sex. Just like why an 18 year old boy would have sex with an older woman despite them having nothing in common

[Cheerguy]

They probs want experience from that older men. That's what young woman told me.

[Sirenboobzilla]

One of my "friends" started dating her boyfriend when she was 18. He was 52 and her former HS teacher. The very idea makes me want to vomit.

I'm 27 now, and I couldn't possibly see myself being with someone under 21 a the most.

[HelpfulWoman]

the law can allow a lot of things that still seem icky.

any older person who needs to date younger and more naive people, you need to ask why...

Just because legally they're not a pedo, does not not make them morally so.

[genericname85]

it's mostly just women being butthurt about being less attractive and unattractive men believing they can get more pussy by aggreeing with women xD

[celenino]

This should be the pinned answer. It exhausts the entire subject - there is nothing else to be said.

[genericname85]

@celenino it's true. No 18 year old chick ever complained that she's attractive to men.

[bobby_bush_eater]

18 specifically its not so much the act itself but the assumption that the man does other things and pushes boundaries. Especially in the US where you can't drink at 18 where is an older man going to find them? What if she's 17 or 16? Did he know her then?

There's a lot of reasons it's "taboo" but it's actually a pretty new concept in our society

[Kingofkings1992]

A lot of people call someone a pedophile without even fully understanding what pedophilia is @Apple1996 is one of them

[Cheerguy]

Yes she is absolutely lost

[Apple1996]

A 18 year old is still undeveloped. They are literally still in a child's body.

[Cheerguy]

@Apple1996 they are legally an adult not a child.

[Apple1996]

@Cheerguy the law shouldn't decide your morals

[Cheerguy]

@Apple1996 it should in my opinion

[Apple1996]

@Cheerguy you are letting lawmakers control you then like literally control your actions. Not to mention the majority of them are pedos even many of our recent president's

[Cheerguy]

@Apple1996 18 is adult age everywhere in the world. Wake up

[Apple1996]

@Cheerguy 18 is legal to take advantage of dumb kids. Not even just sexually but take advantage of them money wise

[Cheerguy]

@Apple1996 that makes no sense. If they are given money the 18 year old is taking advantage of the older person

[Cheerguy]

@Apple1996 it's only taking advantage if the person feels like it in my opinion

[Apple1996]

@Cheerguy the person usually doesn't realize they've been taken advantage of till they are 25+ after they have mentally developed enough to realize it

[Apple1996]

@Cheerguy I was talking more like 18 year olds going into debt 😂

[Cheerguy]

@Apple1996 it depends on the person

[Apple1996]

@Cheerguy it really doesn't. No 18 year old is fully developed yet enough to make good choices

[Cheerguy]

@Apple1996 I am saying if they would feel taken advantage of. 18 year olds know what they are doing. If it was fully consensual there is a good chance they wouldn't feel taken advantage of

[Apple1996]

@Cheerguy you cannot expect childern to understand the concept of being taken advantage of

[Apple1996]

Also I'm gonna add in that nobody would be offended by name calling If it doesn't apply to them. Feeling offended by me rightfully calling someone a pedo means there is some underlying guilt there

[Cheerguy]

@Apple1996 no you are just being rude and using the word wrong. You fail to understand that 18 year old is an adult and you never will.

[Apple1996]

@Cheerguy you fail to have morals. I have to imagine any old man thinking a 18 year old is grown isn't grown himself and probably has some type of mental delay. I gotta ask did you feel your frontal lobe develop or no?

[Anonymous]

yet society (mainly feminists) will do everything in their power to ensure an 18 year woman is allowed to vote in elections

[Jennz6]

I know a lot of girls dating guys in their mid twenties

[handsomelad70]

Because 18-year-old "women" may be legally able to consent to s*x, but most are still girls in almost every respect.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Would you like a man around your age trying to date and screw your 18 year old daughter?

[Tim2nice]

Once she’s 18 she can make her own decisions. If she wants to date an older man it’s not my business

[Anonymous]

Because people think they want someone young and naive to manipulate

[AngryCarl]

How would you feel if she was your daughter?

[mickeysmonkey]

Far too many people want the world to live a certain way regardless of what is lawful or right or wrong

[Cheerguy]

Only some fools care. Most people don't care

[Apple1996]

18 year olds are basically still kids

[standardguy]

Why kids can have sex? When a woman is old enough for dating?

[Apple1996]

@standardguy I don't agree with that lol

[_piotr]

No, they are not kids anymore.

[Apple1996]

@_piotr a 18 year old today could literally have been a kid legally yesterday. 1 day difference doesn't make them magically grown

[_piotr]

"1 day difference doesn't make them magically grown" - Exactly - this is just a legal date. Some are ready faster or later. It depends on the person. That is why I am ok with 18 years. Most people are ready from a long time already before 18. 18 year old can vote, buy alcohol, smoke, drive, be drafted to military, study at collage, answer at court as adults. These are young adults, not kids. In the past in many cultures it was ok to marry long before it. In XIX young people could already work in factory. In XVIII century it was people at that age could be officers in military and navy.

Through most history, life expectancy was about 33 years old. Now life is artificially prolonged, but that doesn't mean people today are morons. Thet are just treated like babies by nanny state and some people like you. It is up them and eventually their parents to decide are they ready. If they want: Volenti non fit iniuria (Latin: "to a willing person, injury is not done").

[Apple1996]

@_piotr most 18 year olds should not be able to do any of those things you listed. They are not mature enough to handle those things. That's why here in the US drinking and smoking age is 21. Many kids have high car insurance till 25 cuz they are such a risk on the road. a lot of Airbnbs don't rent to kids under 21 cuz they are a risk of trashing a house. There is a reason for those rules

[_piotr]

They can and are doing all these things I listed in my country. In your country they are not mature because of people like you and government who baby them. If they were born in other country they would be mature. 18 is already very high limit.

[Apple1996]

@_piotr even with my birth at 18 they forced me to deliver at a high risk hosptial with my family there because teen mothers and their babies are more likely to die during birth. After 20 they do not make mothers do that because they are grown and not at risk anymore. 18/19 are still childern in so many ways even tho the law says they are adults. Financial, medical, developmental wise those ages are kids

[Apple1996]

@_piotr the country doesn't make a difference. The risks are still there regardless of the law

[_piotr]

No it is not. Stop producing spoilt, immature, lazy, not accountable, snowflake, baby-adults. Enough of this already. No wonder that wokeness is consuming your country.

[Apple1996]

@_piotr I had a friend that went to Brazil of all places and couldn't rent a Airbnb there cuz of age restrictions so it's definitely not just the US. On some of these rules

[_piotr]

In my country 18 years is enough to airbnb. Nobody dares to insult adults in my country calling them babies.

During WWII teenagers fought in Warsaw uprising to free city from nazis and were proud of it.

I know a man who at 33 was granted professorial title by president. When did he made egineenering title, master degree, phd, habilitation, and professorial title. Simple He wasn't wasting his young years pretending to be a baby.

Think about people from the past: Mozart died at 35 living hundreds musical masterpieces.

I told you. In medieval times people at age 33 died and were considered old. Now life is artificially prolonged by medicine and hygiene.

[Apple1996]

@_piotr you ironically mentioned only men. Womens and men's maturity is much different. Girls mature faster in the beginning of life then it slows down and men start maturing faster in adulthood. It's probably acutally some odd trauma response on a females part because we are forced to be mature as childern. I don't think biologically that is suppose to happen. More of a society/trauma thing

[_piotr]

Now playing a women are victim card? Ehh... You can consider 60-year old as children if you want. I do not.

[_piotr]

Ironically, as I observed, women mature much faster than men.

[Apple1996]

@_piotr some old people do unfortunately revert back to the mind of a child with dementia and brain cancers. Low key very sad 😔

[_piotr]

Then it's a good point for you, considering our conversation. Lock them all in kindergartens, take away their rights and call them kids. In this way in USA all people will be kids all the time from birth to death.

[Chazmatazz269]

Jealousy and envy are powerful feelings.

[BarryLiverstone]

You are 46. Are you asking on behalf of your son?

[Kit_Kat88]

Only if they’re like 40 maybe and she’s 18

[jahaims]

It's predatory

[loveslongnails]

Envy

[Pohjolan]

Jealousy.