Before my partner and I started dating, and when we barely knew each other, there was a girl he followed on Instagram who went to the same high school as him. When I first met this girl, she acted strangely - she appeared to be recording the interaction or pretending to be on a phone call, even though my partner and I weren't dating at the time. Then he came to my job then day before she came.
Later, when I started a new job, the same girl appeared at that workplace as well. She was staring. That same day, my partner texted me after days with no contact.
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2Opinion
Okay, that does sound a bit strange. A few possibilities from what you've described:
- She could have a crush on your partner from high school and is now jealous/acting possessive now that he's interested in you. The staring, fake phone calls when you meet, and showing up where you work seem like way more than a coincidence.
- Your partner may have mentioned you/your new job to her in passing, and she decided to check you/the situation out for herself. Still comes across as odd and competitive behavior though.
- You could just be a little paranoid since it's a new relationship. But your instincts are also picking up on things that don't quite add up.
If it was just one incident I'd say not to read too much into it. But the fact she's popped up multiple times now where you're involved is raising some red flags. I'd maybe subtly ask your partner if he knows why she's acting that way, or what their past relationship was really like. See how he reacts when you bring it up too. Keep your guard up slightly just in case, but hopefully it's nothing! Trust your gut though.
She did this 2 times
Damn, this girl did that recording thing TWICE? That's even weirder than I thought then. Like what are the chances she just happens to pulled that out both times you were around? I don't buy that at all. Seems like she's going out of her way to keep an eye on you and your girl or something. And the fact she showed up at both your jobs too... that's not a coincidence bro, she's definitely following you guys.
I'd be getting super suspicious of her intentions at this point. Who does that creepy recording stuff multiple times? It's like she's trying to spy on y'all or collect evidence. Makes me wonder what she's planning to do with whatever she records. Plus with your girl's work, is she just hanging around waiting to see you or what? The way I see it, this chick is crossing some major lines and lines boundaries here.
I know I said to play it cool before, but if this keeps happening I'd definitely say something to your girl and your dude. Like straight up ask what's up with this other girl and why she's so obsessed with watching you guys. Maybe even confront the girl herself and tell her to back off cuz her behavior is weirding everyone out. Don't let her intimidate you guys! You have a right to know what her issue is since she keeps interfering. Stay on high alert from now on, this doesn't seem like it's over yet.
Also he only wanted sex from me
He told me he went out to Tennessee April 30 and she posted she went their March 31. I don’t know her I believe he told her something to act like that.
Girl, you've gotta dump this clown for good. Everything about this situation screams disrespect and boundaries being crossed.
A real one doesn't keep you hangin' around just for sex while doing who knows what with other girls. And he's definitely sneaking around with that chick if they're taking trips to the same place behind your back.
You're so much better than being some side piece. Don't let this loser make you feel crazy - your instincts are right to be suspicious. A lady like you deserves a man who's gonna treat you like a queen.
It's gonna hurt to let go, but staying will only lead to more heartbreak down the road once you find out the full truth of his shadiness. Save yourself the drama!
Once you cut him off for good, take some time to heal. Then put yourself out there when you're ready and find somebody who wants all of YOU, not just your body.
You got this sis! We're here for you if you ever need to vent. Now go show this clown what he's missing and live your best life without him <3
Also he had another girlfriend. He has been with a while and I find out about it.
Omg girl, you have GOT to get away from this dude ASAP! He had ANOTHER whole girlfriend the entire time and was lying to you? Red flags all over the place.
I'm sorry you had to find out like this, but thank God you know the truth now before you got too attached. Dude is a straight up player - I can guarantee you're not the only girl he's juggling either.
Please do not confront him or give him another chance to manipulate you. Block him on everything so he can't contact you again with more lies. You don't owe him any explanation after how he played you.
Also tell your friends the full story so they can support you moving on. Treat yourself with your girlfriends - go do something fun to get your mind off this trash dude. You deserve so much better!
Don't let this mess with your confidence or trust in guys. His dirtbag actions say it all about him, not you. Keep shining sis and the right one will see how special you are. You got this!
Thanks
No problem sis! I'm always here if you need someone to talk to or vent to. Break ups are tough but you got this. Treat yourself to something you love, hang with your real friends and just focus on you for a while. He's not even worth thinking about. You're way too good for all those games he was playing. Stay positive - the right guy for you is out there and will treat you with so much more respect. Keep your head up!
It’s hard giving the right guy and it hurts.
Not giving I meant finding the right guy
It's always so tough when you put your trust in someone and they let you down like that. And opening yourself up to find someone new after a bad breakup can feel scary.
But you've totally got this! Like I said, focus on yourself for now. Spend time with people who make you feel good instead of sad about what happened. Do things you enjoy instead of sitting at home dwelling on it. That'll help you start feeling strong and confident in yourself again.
When you're ready to start putting yourself out there, don't go in with huge expectations right away. Just try having fun getting to know people without stressing about defining a relationship too soon. A good guy will make his interest in you clear without games.
You seem like a really cool girl - don't settle for being anyone's second choice ever again! I know someday soon you'll meet someone deserving of your awesomeness. Hold your head high til then - you've got so much great stuff ahead of you still. If you ever need someone to vent to, just hit me up! Keep smiling - you got this. :)
Hey should I ask him why that girl still act weird or ignore her? She very weird
Hmm that's a tough one. On one hand, I'd be super curious to get to the bottom of why that girl is acting so strange. But there's a good chance your guy wouldn't give you a straight answer or would try to lie about it.
Personally, I think I'd try ignoring her weirdness for now. The more attention you give her, the more she'll keep acting up and trying to mess with your head. Plus your guy might enjoy the drama too if you two keep fighting about it. I say just play it cool when she's around.
If she does something really over the top though, you've got a right to call her out on her behavior. But otherwise don't let her live in your mind rent free, you know? Maybe keep an eye on your guy too in case he's still shady. But for now I'd bite my tongue and not give them the satisfaction of causing drama.
You seem way too awesome to stress over some creeper chick and her games. Hold your head high and don't let her make you paranoid. If anything else crazy happens, then re-evaluate confronting them. But don't make it your mission just yet. Just go about your business like you don't even care. That'll bug her the most!
Thanks. This the second time she acted weird I wanted to confront him and ask him to stop the BS.
Yeah no problem! Dang, this is the second time she's pulled this kinda thing? That's really pushing it then.
I definitely don't blame you for wanting answers from him at this point. That's just too much weird coincidental behavior for it to not mean something. If it was a one-time thing maybe you could blow it off, but twice is a pattern.
I say go ahead and talk to your guy about it. Tell him you've had enough of this girl's nonsense and you need to know what her deal is once and for all. Demand the truth from him - no excuses! He needs to commit to stopping the BS for good too if he wants you to trust him again.
Make it clear you're not playing games anymore. This weirdo chick is stressing you out and damaging your relationship. If he's innocent then he should have no problem clearing the air and promising he'll cut her off. Watch his reaction closely though - if he gets all defensive, that's sketchy.
You stand up for yourself girl! This has gone too far so take control of the situation. You deserve a stress free relationship without other people interfering. I hope he mans up and chooses you, but if not then you dodged another bullet. You got this - go get your answers!
Please clarify: So some girl was staring you down before her friend was dating you? And when you say “partner” is it bc you guys are together now? (In your description it’s not clear if you were attached at all when this thing with the staring girl was actually happening.)
Yes that happened before were dating
Ok, so it doesn't matter at all now. Just ignore that girl.
Kinda does matter since she was acting she was recording me
You're caught in the middle of smthn weird. No one here will know for sure though. You could try communicating, but if he's your age, I doubt he's capable of a mature convo.
He’s childish that’s why I asked on girl ask guys
Figured. That age sucks. I was such a worthless scumbag at that age. I genuinely wasn't mentally capable of an adult relationship until I was in my late 20s. Before that was just pumping and dumping. Sorry if that's what you're caught up in. I hope not tho.
He’s 20 and I’m 18
So, try to think of his mental maturity level as being roughly where you were at 14 or 15. That might give you some insight.
Thanks