Does my crush still like me?

[sunshine05]

Ok so I play an online game and I wasn’t trying to find a guy or anything but I ended up chatting and getting to know this guy online that plays this same phone game that I play. We started talking on a regular basis and after a while he started flirting a little bit with me. He opened up and told me some very personal things about himself and I opened up and told him about some very personal things too. We just connected really well and have a LOT in common. I shared a pic of myself (nothing kinky just a normal pic) and he said he thought I looked “damn good”. He soon after shyly shared a pic of himself (shoulder up normal pic nothing naughty) and I told him I was attracted to him and thought he looked good. We shared some more pics with each other (again nothing naughty). We ended up talking naughty a little bit here and there after that. We told each other about sexy fantasies we’d like to try. We got to know each other quite well. I even made up a list of dating questions and asked him a bunch of stuff to get to know some dating things about him and know him on an even more personal level. We kept talking on a regular basis and would have our little naughty conversations here and there…..

Updates

1 y

Oh crap I just now realized all the details hadn’t uploaded somehow when I posted this earlier wtf. So the story got cut off partway stupid limited words. So after a while when we were talking naughty one night we got interrupted…Here’s the tricky part. I’m married to an abusive awful guy that I’m in the process of getting a divorce from, so I’m currently married for now until things get completed with the divorce. So anyway that night I was chatting on my phone with my crush and…

Updates

1 y

I had to tell him my husband was outside and I jumped off the chat. But that was a huge mood killer and so awkward. After that he talked naughty a good deal less. Understandably so. But we did still talk naughty here and there just not as much. And he had mentioned he felt uncomfortable with me still being married and he didn’t wanna be a home wrecker even tho my marriage was over and I was working on divorce stuff and had long since stopped loving my husband….

[Oliverlogan263]

Okay, this is a tricky situation. A few things:

- It was probably good you were honest with him about being married, even if the timing was really bad. Hiding that wouldn't have been right.

- I can see why it would kill the mood for him to be talking naughty if your husband interrupted. That had to be super awkward!

- He's also right to feel uncomfortable with you still being married technically. Even if it's over emotionally, legally it's not done yet. Most guys wouldn't want to get in the middle of that.

- I'd give him some space for now. The excitement of a new connection is dampened by the reality of your situation.

Maybe check back in with him in a few weeks once things have calmed down. Let him know where you're at with the divorce process without pressing him on the relationship stuff. See how he responds before deciding if he's still interested or just wants to be friends. He might need time to sort his feelings without pressure. Hope it works out in a way that's healthy for both of you!

[sunshine05]

Oh by the way not sure if you saw the rest of the story that I had to continue in the replies to Booklover_90. Cuz I wrote too many words to fit into the updates.

[Oliverlogan263]

Okay I see and I’ve read it sunshine. Here’s my response on that:

Wow that whole situation sounds super intense and complicated. On one hand it's good that your crush was such a gentleman with you even though you could both clearly tell there were feelings there. Respecting your marriage status was the right thing to do, as messy as it is.

It honestly sounds like he definitely likes you too though, just based on everything you described - opening up deeply, flirty moments, how much time you guys spent together, and that long hug goodbye especially! It's cute that he listened to you vent about your marriage issues too. Sounds like he really cares.

Since you were upfront about your feelings for him already, I'd say give him some time and space now. Let the divorce fully happen so he knows there's truly nothing holding you back from being together, you know? Once that's settled and in the past, then maybe gently bring up your feelings again in a low pressure way, like "hey just wanted to check in and let you know how much our connection meant to me."

See what he says in response. His walls are probably just up from past hurts, but it seems clear there's something real between you two. I bet once things are less complicated legally, he'll probably feel more comfortable opening up about what HE wants too. Just give it time - he seems worth the wait! Keep me posted, I'm rooting for you guys!

[In_Trance]

This is absolutely retarded.
You're way too old for this shit. Meet somebody in person and have real conversations

[Booklover_90]

It’s the internet. For all you know, that man could be a phony. Or he could be married and his wife found out that he was talking with another woman. People make up fake personas all the time online. You have to be careful.

[sunshine05]

I actually did a background search on him with one of those paid background search websites and it showed he ain’t married. So that part at least checks out. He even shared his full name with me (which is how I was able to later search up about him) and even his address (tho he does live in a different state), so ain’t like I can easily visit him but he said he’d be willing to relocate a while back if we dated.

[sunshine05]

Also I know that’s his actual name too cuz he showed me his drivers license when telling me a story about him being in the navy and showing his new license compared to his old military one to show how the old one had multiple states and addresses combined because of the military stuff and having to move around for a while.

[Booklover_90]

You’re very confident about your research. For all you know, he could’ve created a whole different identity. How do you know he is who he says he is? Have you ever video chatted with him?

[sunshine05]

Ok my story question is too long and didn’t post everything earlier. And it limits how much I can add. Here’s continued from my updates….. My crush was goin on a trip to a geeky convention soon and I decided I wanted to go there and finally meet in person. It was in another state. He and I also live in different states. So anyway we both go and we meet up there in the hotel lobby the next day and have breakfast together. Then we hung out at the convention together for the next four days. We would wake up have breakfast together then go to the convention and hang out the whole time there and then come back and eat and hang out on the balcony terrace where guests could hang out at. We watched fireworks together on the 4th of July. He was a gentleman tho and didn’t try putting any moves on me tho since I’m still technically married. But he did talk to me in my room one morning when I was having a depressed day and he talked to me until I calmed down. Also I shared the awful details of my marriage with him and he talked and listened to me tell him the details. One day I needed help with my cosplay and he helped zip my zipper that I couldn’t get to go up and he saw a little of my bra but was gentleman.

[sunshine05]

The day we were both flying back to our home states he stopped by my room and talked for a while and then I asked if I could have a hug and he gave me a nice very long hug that last probably 5 or 10 mins. He held me really close and tight and rubbed my back sweetly and I just melted in his arms. Then we said bye. He had a flight before me. We have talked every day since online. I told him one night during our trip, I texted him after I had went back to my room for the night, how I felt about him after meeting him and that I would date him if I wasn’t married and I explained in great detail how I liked him a lot so he knows I really like him. He hasn’t told me what he thinks of me after meeting me in person tho because a little before the trip I tried to get him to do a video call. And he was nervous about how his voice sounds and he is really down on himself and thinks he is ugly but he’s not and his voice sounds fine. But that had freaked him out and the whole me being married still made him uncomfortable so he had told me “no flirting” until I wasn’t married. So I’m kinda in the friend zone right now. But I really wanna know if he still likes me or not but I don’t wanna freak him out. He’s really shy and he’s been hurt in past relationships really bad so I understand he has walls up.

[DishLady]

If it's only online it's meaningless to one or both of you.

[RyanK9b]

There you have it. Complete the divorce and you can continue. Easy

[Twalli]

Why do you think he no longer likes you?

[sunshine05]

Mainly because he just hasn’t mentioned anything about possibly dating anymore. Or told me what he thinks about me after meeting me in person. So I don’t know if he’s just afraid of getting hurt in another relationship since his past ones didn’t work out well or if he’s just too shy to tell me how he feels or if he just simply doesn’t like me anymore.

[Twalli]

I'm pretty sure he still likes you, but considering your situation, he may want to move more slowly.