When it’s come to age gap, how much is too much?

[Itsmeirem]

What is your opinions about age gap relationships? What is the acceptable age gap for you?

[ohsheeT]

No there's a lot of things that come with this question I've been in this position before and I thought about it..

I have guys at my work that are in their twenties early twenties and we're friends and their wives always trying to hook me up with their friends because their wives say that they want me to teach their husbands how to be responsible real and more mature

So their wives have hooked me up with their friends before and they were the same as their age. And I've hit it off with one or two of them and I have had the same chat

One of them told me that she was totally in love with me I said okay what about our age difference she said she doesn't care I said well I don't really care either but there will become a Time point where let's say we did get together and we made it all the way until I was 70 or 80.

I told them both that I would feel as if I'm holding you back and I would never want to do that so there would have to become a moment in time to where I would say okay you have to go because I don't want to hold you back and they both said well what happens if we don't want to go I said well we have to have rules I don't want anybody taking care of me I don't want to hold you back I want you to live and explore and experience life they said they didn't care and I said yeah right blah blah blah... Everybody in our group of friends thought it was a good idea if we got together not one of them were negative about it that's because they know me they know her but I'm sure if you ask society they would all have opinion they would call me dirty names they would call her dirty names and they know neither one of us so that's really sad. I think as long as two people truly truly love each other and are committed I think that they should be together and it's nobody else's business now the difference in age Gap I have not a clue all I know is that if I was to go out with a younger person with a bigger age Gap is it one day I know for a fact I would be holding her back and I would not ever want that

[TheSpaceGnome]

It varies.
Things to consider are:
1. Relatability
2. Lifespan/Health
3. Adulthood.
4. Social setting.

If both are adults, will live about as long as eachother, and get along famously, then you aren't going to see negative effects from an age gap.

The bigger the age gap is, the less likely all those criteria will be met.

Odds will increase if the older person looks as young as the younger person, as this may mean they will live longer than most people their age.

But if a wrinkly balding 80 year old is dating a youthful healthy 20 year old, the older person is almost certainly going to widow the younger, and no one wants that.

If a generational gap creates lifestyle or hobby differences, then they won't get along well.

If the older person has kids that are the same age, close to the same age, or older than the younger person, it will be socially very awkward.

Something like 1-10 years difference is typically negligable for anyone, but higher gaps that meet those criteria are fairly rare.

[Anonymous]

My husband he is 47 and I am 31 let me tell you it has been the best relationship I ever experienced. I date guys my own age they were all horrible I was punch smacked hit I was called a bitch in arguments sadly all millennial men are all mommas boy. Me my age would put mommy and little siblings first before me. They would not spend time with me. My ex boyfriend he was 17 I was 18 at the time at he time I comforted him and spoke to him lime am adultnthat he never spend time with me he wantedto take hus little sister to soccer practice I told him that was his mommas job to drop his sister8 years old at he time his mom could off to practice not him. Later his little sister broke her leg and my ex til this day blames it on me yelled at me told me it was all my fault his little sister broke her leg if he drop her off none of this would had happened. My ex husband is 32 still a mommas boy put his mother first before me even walk out of the temple holding his mom's hand while I was left behind. I Burts in tears and my friend had to redo my make up for more pictures. Now we are divorce and he til this day at age 32 still continue being a mommas boy and everytime I try to have a conversations with my ex he would make fake fart sounds and burped childish if you ask me. He hates the fact that I am raising my kids Christian my ex is Mormon. Now my husband he is 47 he is mature makes his own choices is capable to decide for himself and not rely on what mommy wants. He is mature can actually handle serious conversations we spend hours talking he very loving and caring. It's a beautiful feeling that I ca not explain. And as long ageis legal age difference has nothing to do with similarities. He is a strong christian spiritual husband. I am a traditional wife. So there my testimony just because a guy is 32 that does not mean we are the same.

[Apple1996]

The bigger the gap the more likely it is for the relationship to fail. It's always best to get with someone your own age. I don't ever see any couples in long term relationships (10+ year together) with a huge gap

[TrueConfection]

Acceptable age gap for me?

I'd say over 10 years is questionable and depends on the two people in the relationship. Anything over 16 years is too much like a parent/child relationship and I find it gross.

[DishLady]

Personally, 5 years higher or lower would be my limit. A bit more objectively, I've seen a 10-year gap work in very particular situations. It's not for everyone.

[Finchie40]

I it doesn’t matter , as long as you are both legal age of consent and you both have great chemistry and connection together , that’s all that matters

[Str8upguy]

I was married for ten years to a woman who was nine years younger than me. We met when I was twenty-eight and she was nineteen. Back then, it was something we thought about, but we hit it off so well, that we ignored it. As time went on it became a non-issue, and we married five years later. It worked because I've always been a kid at heart and she, unfortunately, had to grow up too fast. So emotionally, we were pretty close to the same age. We were, above all, best friends. We did notice some differences in things we referenced in conversation, but to us it was just a learning opportunity. I agree with some of the others, that the age you are when you first get together has an impact on this. The older you both are when you meet, the less important an age difference matters. I feel that over ten years apart has the potential to put the two people in different exeriential groups with less common ground, but it really depends on the couple. If there is a greater difference, like fifteen years or more, I would look at 'why' you are attracted to the other person. If it's a wholesome reason, then go for it. It takes a little bit of honest introspection, and some people can't do that, so tread cautiously, but don't be afraid.

[Anonymous]

Gets bigger as people get older.

Up to age 14, maximum of 1 year (and also, expectedly light and non serious appropriate to age).
There up to age 19, 2 to 3 years maximum (with 15 years, upward difference till 18, then both ways until 26).
26 to 30, up to 10 years difference (though not down past 16).
31 to 50, up to 25 years (though not down past age 20, and typically 15 [aka 25 at a stretch, for a really mature younger person, typically a girl as girls generally mature better than men])
51 to 100, up to 30 years

Though, I wouldn't hold against any age gap where both partners where over 20 years old, though I would find breaking those limits 'a bit creepy'.

[BetaBucks]

If they're adults, then it's up to them to decide. If they're children, it becomes super difficult. Because even two 16 year olds shouldn't be dating sometimes, because of the potential for one to not be developed. Especially boys, who mentally and physically develop much more slowly. But any age gap with children should be closely watched by parents.

[osmanthus]

I think age gaps can work but it just dependent on where thw people are in their lives and how old they are exactly to be reasonably mature; a 20 year old man probably isn't going to be as mature as a 40 year old man. For me, personally, I don't think I would go past 15 years difference in terms of me being the younger partner. I like to keep within my generational bracket.

[osmanthus]

There are exceptions and some people who are younger can demonstratively prove or even display that they are mature in relation to their older partner but it's very rare and it's usually cases like that don't really last and even if it does last those relationships are more transactional in nature or rather the relationship that's more fleeting and impermanent.

[osmanthus]

This usually applies to males who are in the early twenties and females that are in their thirties.

[osmanthus]

Plus it's hard to think of a man in his early twenties while you're a woman who's perhaps 30 years and up as more than full male partner in that no woman really wants to take care of a man domestically in such a way that she thinks of him as her son.

[osmanthus]

There are m**** and there are women who really like younger men that's not a problem they have them most boy toys. I wouldn't consider it appropriate at any time to pursue a younger man unless there are unique circumstances.

[StudyingAuthor]

Well... in certain terms like when the person is 20 and say they're dating a 30 year old. That's cool. I would just say 10 years. But if you take someone my age and they're dating a 24 year old. MAJOR RED FLAGS!

[WhitneySnow]

I would never date anyone more than ten years older or younger than me, but if you want to then that’s your business (as long as they’re legal).

[BetaBucks]

You might want to take back the "10 years younger" part of your comment lol... 🚓 🚨

[WhitneySnow]

@BetaBucks lol. I meant when I’m old enough, like in my twenties and thirties. Tbh I’ve never dated anyone younger than me (although a few have been the same age) and I really don’t think I’d go for it, but I just said that to be inclusive.

[WhitneySnow]

In general I prefer dating people who are my age or a couple years older, but I wanted to be inclusive.

[BetaBucks]

Hahaha I know I know. It was just bad phrasing.

But yeah, fair enough

[Empery]

The guy gets old and lazy fast and then he lets himself go and shit on the walls in the toilet. Realistically you both could date but not really be together long term.

[Serkee]

I think the standard "half your age plus seven" is a good guideline to go by.

[Nikki1989]

It is not so much the age gap, but the ages of the two people involved.

[Anonymous]

Depends on the age,


If you’re both in your 20s I’d say 6-7 years




30s 10 years


Over that any age seems fine.


I think any age before 30 dating with more that 7-8 year max is weird

[Anonymous]

It's not the gap. It's the age the gap happens in. Maturity is key. When one is too young the older becomes predator.

[anon1903]

When they're your child's age, under eighteen or could be your parental substitute

[dsrice071966]

I think it is up to the individuals in the relationship it is the best to agree what is right between the couple

[noohair]

Both over 18 and a pulse, gap does not matter.

[gabe10]

2 years for under 18s but for adults do what you like.

I wouldn’t go younger than 11 or older than 15

[MatureMan40]

It is up to you and the guy. If you have a great and healthy relationship, then it is ok.

[Abdulwahh]

For me i dont mind for now that im in my mid 20s someone who is 18 or 19 .

[Kathy2005]

I dated from 18-23 maybe two years older then that.

[Samantha36]

For me I'd say 25 years and above

[Anonymous]

I experienced till 20 years age gape..
And it was unique

[SweetJoyGirl]

6+ years for me.

[BarryLiverstone]

I will not date someone over 80

[12karen]

More than 9years older and 2years younger for me

[LiamJHayden]

Is there such a thing?

[Enes38]

Can be up to 10 years old

[nevooo]

Huh?

[Enes38]

I meant the age difference.

[nevooo]

was about to say lol

[Enes38]

I'm not a pedophile 😅🤣

[scott04sa22]

Go for it

[KralArthur]

11 years is too much