Hoy is the guy i’m dating supposed to treat me when we are with his friends?

[melaniegonza]

regardless of age (given i’m 16), how is the guy i’m dating supposed to properly treat me (without breaking his back) when he’s invited me to hang out with him and his friends? especially if this is the first few times we have met up in person

i heard from many that boys usually act different or less engaged with the girl and mostly prioritise his friends when he’s with them, and she’s there, since he’s distracted by his friends and not really taking any notice of the girl he’s brung.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ok here's how I think a guy should treat a girl he's dating when with his friends:

First of all, he should make sure to properly introduce you to everyone when you all meet up. Something like "Guys, this is (your name), my girlfriend. Babe, this is Jake, Matt, etc." That makes you feel included right away.

He should check in with you and make you feel involved in conversations. Like if the guys are talking about something, he can politely say "Babe, you remember when we..." to bring you into the story.

Definitely don't ignore you! I know it's easy to get distracted talking to the guys, but he needs to find a balance. Look at you, smile, ask your opinions on stuff too. Find things you both can contribute to discussions.

Also be welcoming if you want to join in whatever they're doing. Don't just shut you out like "Sorry you can't play video games/frisbee/whatever with us babe." make an effort to include you.

Plus little things like standing by you instead of grouping far away, introducing you to people one-on-one if you seem shy, getting you a drink if they're grabbing something. Just small gestures so you feel respected.

Most of all, don't be all over his friends and ignore you! You're both there together so find a balance of hanging with everyone but still giving his full attention to his girl too. That's super important to make you feel comfortable and cared for.

[ChicoFromThe305]

There should be no change in how he treats you compared to when y'all are alone except for maybe a bit of less flirting or lovey dovey shit, possibly more of a silly mood

[Breanna_nonbinary]

If you can have a boyfriend that treats you like a friend and have an intimate relationship with then that’s great. If he was possessive and wanted to dictate your every decision then I’d be worried.

[Breanna_nonbinary]

How are things going?

[melaniegonza]

strange, he acts very in love over text but in person he excludes me from conversations and doesn’t try to initiate in any engagement other than PDA and tries to kiss me during the day, it all feels superficial since there isn’t any emotional connection in person. a friend of mine said this is “normal” and guys don’t talk to the girls they like when they invite them with their friends but to me it feels uncomfortable, especially since we have hung out twice and those 2 times i was just sidelined 90% of the day and this is apparently “socially acceptable”. i dunno if it’s just a guy thing, but as a girl, if i had invited him with my friends (tbh regardless of who’s there) i’d try my best to include him and talk to him.

[Breanna_nonbinary]

Every guy is different just like every woman is different. But you need to ask yourself if it’s what you want. That’s pretty much what it comes down to.

[WhitneySnow]

He’s supposed to be nice to her and introduce her to all his friends and make sure she’s having a good time

[sethtav]

Just hang out and be normal and talk and stuff. Sounds like you want to be center of attention and that happens when you guys are alone.

[melaniegonza]

haha, i meant if he’s romantically interested and it’s the first few dates, it’s not uncommon to hang out it groups especially at this age (15-16) since i know one on one dates are more common or ideal as you get older. should he still be making a bit of an effort to include me or try to engage in conversations during the day? especially since i don’t know his friends at all and neither him that much. i was asking since i had gone on 2 dates with a guy who claimed to be into me but those 2 times we hung out he didn’t try to include me in barely any conversations and i was stuck sidelined since his friends weren’t interested in talking to me either lol, i had tried to comment on some things to make an effort to try and include myself but it was a bit awkward, most of the day he was more engaged with his friends and didn’t really try to talk to me barely at all, i didn’t know if this was supposed to be common or classed as normal since i’ve never had a boyfriend before and since we had hung out in a group i didn’t know if he was supposed to make an effort to make a good impression, regardless of who is there or not, because i know if it was viceversa i’d me more attentive to him since he’s unfamiliar with me and my friends. it’s a bit difficult to try to talk when he’s mostly interested in playing around with his friends during the day especially since this is the first time i’m meeting up with him, and his friends.