Is it worth breaking up with my boyfriend because he went to a bar without telling me?

[bjork]

[MisterWack]

Not at all. As a couple, you set ground rules / use your words to settle disputes instead of just ending the relationship.

Reasons I would’ve suggested you break up on the theme of ‘going to the bar without notice’

A) I mean if he went to the bar drank then drove himself home then yeah that is a good reason to dump his ass since drinking while driving is bad.
B) He cheated with someone at the bar and didn’t tell you to cover it up that you have irrefutable evidence to prove.

and so on….

Just not letting you know about going to the bar is not the end of the world. Just sit him down and calmly tell him it upset you, that’s all and try to compromise or something.

[MisterWack]

*It’s just a bit of an overreaction, just a little bit is all. I’m sure your boyfriend is nice & will help ease your worries / come to an agreement of some kind to ease your mind.

[Summeroflove]

Wonder why he went to a bar…. Do yourselves Both a favor you cannot control him. You need to discuss your relationship boundaries and what you want. But at the end of the day if you’re not compatible you’re just not.

It’s fine to have standards it’s not okay to try to force someone to conform
To them. You’re 41 and cannot hold down a relationship I wonder why that may be

[Flower7]

No, that’s a very small thing to break up over. It’s just a bar, not a strip club.

[CuriousMoonFox]

Then again, aren't there bars in strip clubs? 😅

[Flower7]

I wouldn’t know lol.

[Jennz6]

@CuriousMoonFox Yes, strip clubs have a bar

[CuriousMoonFox]

@Jennz6 Aren't they called "titty bars" even if they didn't? 😂

[Jennz6]

@CuriousMoonFox we actually have a bar, plus tables around the stage where we dance 💃

[CuriousMoonFox]

@Jennz6 Good to know 😂 Though I'm not sure whether I would ever pay money to be teased.

[Jennz6]

@CuriousMoonFox don’t you want to go home horny and have sex with your wife?

[CuriousMoonFox]

@Jennz6 😂 Are you sure wives would be okay with this? Wouldn't it be cheaper and morally acceptable if the wives stripped for their husbands instead? Also what if I don't have a women to go home to?

[Jennz6]

@CuriousMoonFox yes, the wife should strip for her husband and get him turned on but if he doesn’t have a wife then he should spend his money in a club where I can turn him on

[CuriousMoonFox]

@Jennz6 I dont know. Will it not be painful to build up tension and not have any place to release it? It's like being hungry and pay for a pizza you can look at and smell but not touch 😂

[Jennz6]

@CuriousMoonFox you can touch in the VIP ROOM

[Jennz6]

@CuriousMoonFox DM me

[CuriousMoonFox]

@Jennz6 Just for the record, I'm not a potential customer 😂 Sorry if I gave you that impression.

[Jennz6]

@CuriousMoonFox that’s okay honey 🥰

[thatshydork]

If that’s truly all he did, then no. There’s no harm in going to a bar.

[CuriousMoonFox]

Question is what kind of bar.

[AviatorTom]

That you would even ask that question means there's more to your relationship than you're telling. Why would just that want you to break up? Are you that controlling?

[babet]

Before jumping to conclusions about this situation, it is important to talk calmly. Why did he do it, how did it make you feel? There may be a lack of trust, but instead of breaking up immediately because of a single incident, it may be healthier to seek a solution by communicating.

[bjork]

Communication always seems to be the best solution.

[hahahmm]

A. Sure. Because when you are not married you do not need any justification to break up. It can be for any reason or no reason at all. Most likely there's actually deeper reasons or history that makes you want to break up but it just seems like it's about this bar thing. It's probably really about 20+ other things he's done.

B. Not if this is just a brief emotional reaction by you. And has nothing to do with a history of actions on his part.

[chick]

It is important to talk about this situation calmly. There may be gaps in trust and communication, but it may be healthier to seek a solution by openly sharing your feelings rather than immediately breaking up over a single incident.

[bjork]

It would be better to communicate rather than making an immediate decision based on an event.

[freedom]

It is important to talk about this situation openly in some way. Lack of communication can lead to trust issues, but instead of breaking up immediately over a single incident, it may be healthier to seek a solution by sharing your feelings and boundaries.

[bjork]

Yes, you are right. Communication can be a healthier way to break up than breaking up over a single incident.

[ashakantasharma]

it’s not about the specific act of him going to a bar, but rather about how it makes you feel and how that aligns with your values in the relationship. If this action makes you feel disrespected or reflects a larger communication issue, it’s worth having an open conversation to see where things stand. Breaking up is a serious decision, and it’s usually best to fully understand the context of the behavior and what it means for the overall health of the relationship before making that call.

[WindAtMyBack]

I find it hard to believe that anyone would even consider breaking up over something so trivial.

[Jennz6]

Nah, he doesn’t need your permission does he?

[CuriousMoonFox]

What if he does 😅?

[Jennz6]

@CuriousMoonFox then he won’t tell you

[molonski2]

Unless you are an utter control freak , which maybe you are , the answer is obviously NO.

[SolitarySolace]

Are people these days so incapable of making their own decisions that they have to resort to asking the internet for advice on what to do regarding their own love life?

[SolitarySolace]

Some poor guy out there was just broken up with because the internet told some bitch to leave him

[RavVid]

Did he go there for a date or to pick up? Yes.

No in all other circumstances.

[slatyb]

Why didn't he tell you? Do you disapprove? If so, then maybe you aren't compatible.

[Anonymous]

If you're even considering it, then do him a favour and break up. He doesn't need such an insecure controlling drama queen.

[RingOfFire]

That's way over the top. No not just because of that.

[Staximus]

Maybe you should address your control freak issues

[Pete671]

Yes you'll be doing him a favour if you're that insecure in yourself!

[Crazzyyworld]

Ohhh come onnn. Give him a space he needs a time

[KrakenAttackin]

It seems you want to break up with him and are looking for a reason.

[Nikki1989]

That sounds a bit extreme.

[DaBiggestBird]

Did he do anything he shouldn’t have?

[dudeinohio]

No. That's a very petty reason.

[RedInnocent69]

Of course not. What are you? 12?