Is it worth breaking up with my boyfriend because he went to a bar without telling me?

Question

MisterWack · Accepted Answer

Not at all. As a couple, you set ground rules / use your words to settle disputes instead of just ending the relationship.

Reasons I would’ve suggested you break up on the theme of ‘going to the bar without notice’

A) I mean if he went to the bar drank then drove himself home then yeah that is a good reason to dump his ass since drinking while driving is bad.
B) He cheated with someone at the bar and didn’t tell you to cover it up that you have irrefutable evidence to prove.

and so on….

Just not letting you know about going to the bar is not the end of the world. Just sit him down and calmly tell him it upset you, that’s all and try to compromise or something.

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

Wonder why he went to a bar…. Do yourselves Both a favor you cannot control him. You need to discuss your relationship boundaries and what you want. But at the end of the day if you’re not compatible you’re just not.

It’s fine to have standards it’s not okay to try to force someone to conform
To them. You’re 41 and cannot hold down a relationship I wonder why that may be

Flower7 · Accepted Answer

No, that’s a very small thing to break up over. It’s just a bar, not a strip club.

thatshydork · Accepted Answer

If that’s truly all he did, then no. There’s no harm in going to a bar.

AviatorTom · Answer

That you would even ask that question means there's more to your relationship than you're telling. Why would just that want you to break up? Are you that controlling?

babet · Answer

Before jumping to conclusions about this situation, it is important to talk calmly. Why did he do it, how did it make you feel? There may be a lack of trust, but instead of breaking up immediately because of a single incident, it may be healthier to seek a solution by communicating.

hahahmm · Answer

A. Sure. Because when you are not married you do not need any justification to break up. It can be for any reason or no reason at all. Most likely there's actually deeper reasons or history that makes you want to break up but it just seems like it's about this bar thing. It's probably really about 20+ other things he's done.

B. Not if this is just a brief emotional reaction by you. And has nothing to do with a history of actions on his part.

chick · Answer

It is important to talk about this situation calmly. There may be gaps in trust and communication, but it may be healthier to seek a solution by openly sharing your feelings rather than immediately breaking up over a single incident.

freedom · Answer

It is important to talk about this situation openly in some way. Lack of communication can lead to trust issues, but instead of breaking up immediately over a single incident, it may be healthier to seek a solution by sharing your feelings and boundaries.

ashakantasharma · Answer

it’s not about the specific act of him going to a bar, but rather about how it makes you feel and how that aligns with your values in the relationship. If this action makes you feel disrespected or reflects a larger communication issue, it’s worth having an open conversation to see where things stand. Breaking up is a serious decision, and it’s usually best to fully understand the context of the behavior and what it means for the overall health of the relationship before making that call.

WindAtMyBack · Answer

I find it hard to believe that anyone would even consider breaking up over something so trivial.

Jennz6 · Answer

Nah, he doesn’t need your permission does he?

molonski2 · Answer

Unless you are an utter control freak , which maybe you are , the answer is obviously NO.

SolitarySolace · Answer

Are people these days so incapable of making their own decisions that they have to resort to asking the internet for advice on what to do regarding their own love life?

RavVid · Answer

Did he go there for a date or to pick up? Yes. No in all other circumstances.

slatyb · Answer

Why didn't he tell you? Do you disapprove? If so, then maybe you aren't compatible.

Anonymous · Answer

If you're even considering it, then do him a favour and break up. He doesn't need such an insecure controlling drama queen.

RingOfFire · Answer

That's way over the top. No not just because of that.

Staximus · Answer

Maybe you should address your control freak issues

Pete671 · Answer

Yes you'll be doing him a favour if you're that insecure in yourself!

Crazzyyworld · Answer

Ohhh come onnn. Give him a space he needs a time

KrakenAttackin · Answer

It seems you want to break up with him and are looking for a reason.

Nikki1989 · Answer

That sounds a bit extreme.

DaBiggestBird · Answer

Did he do anything he shouldn’t have?

dudeinohio · Answer

No. That's a very petty reason.

RedInnocent69 · Answer

Of course not. What are you? 12?

Is it worth breaking up with my boyfriend because he went to a bar without telling me?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

My boyfriend went to a bar without me?