Women, what are you willing to do to in order to get a guy you like to notice you and pick you?

[Anonymous]

Updates

1 y

Not one woman said how they would show what kind of hobbies and interests and lifestyle they are into.
Not one woman said how they would find said guy who is a perfect match for them.
Not one woman said how they would prove their worth/compatibilty.
Not one woman said anything that actually matters...

No wonder this site is flooded by people with relationship issues. None of you women know wth you even want.

[DishLady]

I don’t really have to do anything specific to get attention. I’m a busy gal and have to deal with a lot of people daily, so I’m sort of always in the middle of things and meeting new people. I just always try to present myself as a positive, helpful person. I just smile, am friendly and open to chatting with others and if I like a guy I just accept spending time with him. Either he WANTS to be with me or he DOESN’T. And if he doesn’t, what’s the point in forcing it with tricks and stuff? 🤷🏻‍♀️

The one thing I’m a little awkward about is remembering names, so a time or two I’ve touched a guy’s arm, smiled and leaned in companionably to ask him to remind me of his name, of the guest speaker’s name, etc. Not exciting for me enough to call it “flirting,” but it does tend to get the guy smiling and sticking around perhaps a little more than he was before. (Is that perhaps the sort of detail you’re were looking for?)

[Crazzyyworld]

We are bimbos go figure

[Asker]

Cringeworthy... but at least you're honest.

[Unit1]

It is time for me to be a misogynist again and generalize, thus discrediting everything else I've said in the past in fondness of women

No surprises there, they do absolutely nothing. Zero. Sitting back and expecting miracles to happen. The most laziest and passive gender. Dating is entirely kept alive by men 97% of the times.

It is no wonder how we're talking about the top 10% of men getting most women and no one really talks about the top 10% of women, save for the sycophant swarms like Belle Delphine or SSSniperwolf perhaps.

[SolitarySolace]

They don’t do anything.

[Asker]

A lot of them don't (but not quite all of them).

My question is more or less a criticism of that.

[MoonFace2]

You’re not allowing for women being shy or socially awkward. I’m comfortable sharing those things with men and I have and have still been rejected. Not all women are as comfortable opening up to other people, as quickly as I am. Not everyone likes or trusts others as easily as I do.

[MoonFace2]

I know several really nice, honest, upfront but unusual (eccentric) women who are great, but they just can’t find the right man.

[Avicenna]

lol, all she has to do is ask the guy out

[Asker]

That wrongfully assumes that the best guy for her will just conveniently appear before her and not reject her

[Avicenna]

You've already said in your question that it's the guy she likes. Why should she tie herself in knots wondering "whether he will pick her"- if she asks him out and he says no, she finds out quickly that he wasn't The One and can find a guy she likes.
You can't reduce risk in life to zero- and most things worth having require taking some sort of risk.

[Asker]

Your answer is so confusing, I don't think we are on the same page here.

Let me try again:
A woman wants to find a husband who is a perfect match, but she doesn't know anyone who is.
What will she do about it?

She knows exactly what kind of guy she likes.

How does she figure out which guys fit that bill, where one is, and then how does she go about showing him who she is as a person and why he should say yes before she asks him out.

Female replies to this question if people had reading comprehension skills:
Example: Well I like _______ as a hobby, so I'd go to _______ wearing _______ and do ______ to show that I like ______ and that should catch the attention of ______ guys, and then when I see one thats attractive I go over and talk to make friends and see where it goes.

Actual female replies:
"be hot"
"nothing"
"we are bimbos"

[virtualwasp]

Nothing. It's important to be genuine and not act like a floozy. I may try to look a little nicer, brush my hair that sort of thing, maybe try to have less guys around me so he doesn't think someone. Is in the picture. But it's a man job to approach and not every girl is a feminist.

[BarryLiverstone]

Having less guys around makes sense. Because as a man isn’t is rude to approach someone who appears to be in a relationship?

[Asker]

@virtualwasp
You completely misinterpreted the question, but ironically it still gives me your answer anyway.
You bring nothing to the table and see yourself as a trophy.

The correct way to interpret my question is "what efforts will you make to attract and keep a guy who is your perfect match?"

This obviously requires being genuine about yourself regarding your preferences and lifestyle, but also not lazy/passive.

It is a remark on the unrealistic expectation of thinking mr. right will just pop into your life and wisk you away without you looking for and attracting him and then voicing your desires.

[virtualwasp]

You are right. I bring very little to the table which is why it takes a very special someone to see the good in me and that is nothing short of a miracle.

[Asker]

Relationships only work when the person you date is your mind in another meat suit.

If you see yourself as having little to no value, you will also see anyone compatible with you as having little to no value, and that will kill the relationship.

Figure out what you enjoy outside of relationships, your hobbies, your dreams, your reasons to get up in the morning. Place value on those who also enjoy those things, then make an effort to meet them and woo them.

Miracles don't exist.

[Asker]

Something to note about trophies by the way, they are only interesting enough by themselves for a while. Then the trophy collector wants more trophies, and more, and that never ends.

Action figures
Trading cards
Model kits
Fancy cars
Music playlists.
Antiques
Etc.

Your goal should not be being a footnote in someone's unending collection.

[virtualwasp]

Duly noted.

[NicholasRedone]

They sure like to do this 👁️👁️ and go 😐😶😐😶 before possibly either going ☺️ politely or they just plain 😌😑 move on with whatever they were doing.

And maybe they took that Time to slowly go "and... he's not attractive actually"

[Asker]

I've seen that before.
The undecided should wait to date until they know exactly what they want.

[NicholasRedone]

You've literally seen that? 😦

[NicholasRedone]

I mean I know I had,😚 countless times. Why must some folks be such stare bears, sighs 🐻 humour and seriousness intended both. Lol 😆 I mean, I know I was told "it's impolite to stare." You know? "Hey lady, you ever seen a man before? Sigh" lol 😆😆 I mean I'm just a man, you're just a woman (not you bro, commenter/asker) lol 😆 anyways buddy

[NicholasRedone]

Some people just seem to stare 🫣🫣🫣

[Tomisworthless]

Preach brother

[Tomisworthless]

Sometimes people cause they hate you or are like some under cover agent of sorts ya know

[NicholasRedone]

@tomisworthless or the other odd ball thing - they're attracted by what they see - or even funnier they're alarmed by what they see 😳😧 lol or they're thinking oohhh he's... potential mate material lol 💕 however I for one haven't been asked out so it can't be that, and be wary the bi guys / gay guys and druggies. Cya 🫂👋🏻

[NicholasRedone]

Even the seemingly straight guys or straight acting, be a good man human tom. Say tom a curious question, do you have life insurance? Just curious 🤨

[Tomisworthless]

Gay bi drug addicts are the worst they think theyre cool and attractive but nobody respects them lol

[Ferngully2000]

Dress up a little, sophisticated but a tiny bit of skin, flirt a little, can be non verbal, act a bit seductive that kind of thing and maybe ask for help (not feeble) to make him feel important and wanted and see if he’s game.

[Ferngully2000]

I think it’s the way you asked the question.,, therefore you got that response. Maybe you should have worded it differently and actually said what you meant,

[overlord337645]

i can't say ik what a woman would do but ima be honest trying to talk to me is 50% of the work and a good base chance and once i get to know you better it will either increase or decrase

[GlowUpGirly5]

Are you wealthy? Do you have an education? Do you make 200k plus a year? Are you a doctor, lawyer, tech professional, real estate investor/developer, a professional athlete? Why would a woman want your attention? What do you have to offer?

[Asker]

I'm a lead developer and graphic artist, but I'm not on offer for anyone replying to this (GAG is not the type of place I'd ever look for a match in).
Had I been on offer, you are not even close to being a good match, so your opinions on male value are irrelevant to me (and had you been a match, I'd not be paying for your stuff with MY money, go make your own lol).

This question is about what you would do to find what you want in a husband, and how you would put in effort to make it known to him that you exist, are interested in him, what you have to offer, and why you're a good choice for him.

[GlowUpGirly5]

I highly doubt that. Those type of men would not be posting this type of question nor do they have the time to be on gag.

[Asker]

Objectively incorrect.
I'm usually on gag while in bed, specifically when I'm too tired to do anything but can't sleep, and have run out of good anime to watch.
I actually have lots of free time, most developers do unless they are some cog in a big company that does crunch hours (I'm the boss of a smaller one and we do not do crunch time), but during the day that free time is mostly used for hobbies.

[GlowUpGirly5]

Sir, stop trying to be something you're not. Wealthy men are not in bed scrolling all day. They're out mingling, at country clubs, galas, making business negotiations and traveling. You'll never be at their level and 🤥 lying won't get you there either. Nice try

[GlowUpGirly5]

And they certainly don't have the problems you have nor ask questions like this because they Can easily obtain women

[Asker]

1. I'm not in bed scrolling all day, The day hasn't even started yet for me, I wake up mid morning being lazy, and stay up late. And I'd rather eat broken glass than live the stereotyping way that you describe the rich.

2. Country clubs are for boring old farts with no imagination or hobbies.

3. Galas are also boring and require mingling with undesirables. If I want to mingle with business partners, they are at my home when needed. if I want to mingle with worthwhile women, they are in online games, developer websites and online groups, modder sites, comicons, youtube channels, arcades, the library, stores that sell retro games and collectables, science museums, literally anywhere besides a shitty gala.

4. I'm not interested in making businesss negotiations, because I'm not interested in selling my IPs or patents. buying anyone else's IPs or patents, or going public with my business (because other people buying stock or merging companies ruins the company goals and ideals and workflow).

5. I HATE traveling, and spend as little time as possible doing that. I am the type to fill my home with everything I want (arcades, a library, a home theater, exotic wildlife, a laboratory, my studio, a chef's kitchen, luxury bathrooms, indoor gardens, collectables. etc.).

6. You talk about finding women easily, as if good ones are common, or as if its plural... Your brain is rotted. Wife material is hard as hell to find at my age. Sure I could get some dumb bimbo gold digger, but I want the genuine love of a very rare type of woman. But again, this question is NOT an advertisement. I'm not interested in anyone on here.

[Asker]

Now run along and go find some old fart with no self respect to leach off of.

[naartjie]

Nothing, I be myself and if that isn’t enough then I don’t want it.

[MoonFace2]

I try to get to know men as friends first. See if there’s any mutual chemistry and if we might be able to build a solid friendship. Then I ask them out.

[MoonFace2]

Honestly, neither a man nor a woman should have to try to force their love interest to choose them. Who wants to be settled for?

[Pohjolan]

What makes you think that we want to fuck our friends?

[MoonFace2]

@Pohjolan well, the foundation of a relationship is friendship. Unless you have that, you won’t last long.

[Pohjolan]

@moonface2
Well I disagree. If I see you as a friend then I see you as a friend.

[MoonFace2]

@Pohjolan yes, but my meaning is that you don’t have to rush into sex and you can’t spend your whole life in bed with someone; eventually you have to talk to them, go out, enjoy each other’s company.

[MoonFace2]

Usually I see my guy friends as friends; and my crushes as my crushes too, but I know you still have to have a solid foundation for all the mutual attraction

[MoonFace2]

That takes time to build up…

[Pohjolan]

@moonface2
When a guy befriends a gal because he wants to get in her pants its manipulative but when a gal does it its building up?

[MoonFace2]

@Pohjolan I never said that either gender doing it is manipulative.

[Pohjolan]

@moonface2
It by definition is when one is dishonest about their intentions for the purpose of influencing someone's behaviour.

[MoonFace2]

@Pohjolan well, there are so many variables there, like randomly ending up with feelings. I don’t think it’s dishonest, although I see where you’re coming from; to not be completely transparent from the beginning of an acquaintanceship.

[MoonFace2]

So long as you reveal your feelings eventually. Then the other party is free to accept or reject your advances and that should be the end of it, (with these two people); either way.

[Pohjolan]

@moonface2
Ending up with feelings for a friend is not the context we are discussing.
Anyway I refuse to play such mind games and have no intention to get a fake friend, much less date one.

[MoonFace2]

@Pohjolan well, we’ll have to respectfully disagree.

[MoonFace2]

Good discussion, anyway. I’ve enjoyed reading your opinions and sharing my own with you.

[Apple1996]

Nothing I would never expect a guy to approach me first

[Asker]

Thats not the question.

[Apple1996]

Oh sorry

[Apple1996]

Personally I only date someone I have chemistry with compatability means nothing to me. So your update is still meh and somewhat confusing

[Asker]

Chemistry and compatibility are synonyms in the context of a relationship.

[PeachyPie93]

Nothing besides just be funny and friendly.. though guys I like usually don't like me.

[Asker]

insecurity aside, your answer is valid. Making friends is really the only effective method.

[PeachyPie93]

True, and if they don't want you well at least you got a new friend lol.

[Asker]

Indeed.

[Valdemort]

In full distress, exclaim: "Pick me! Choose me! Love me!"

Obviously!

[Anonymous]

Lmao at your update. Site flooded with bitter men.

[Asker]

I'm not bitter, I'm pointing out why so many women on this site (and offline) are bitter.
Its because they are lazy and boring and can't be arsed to put in the effort to get what they want.

[Anonymous]

Only advice I give to both parties is don’t be a dick and be yourself.

[Priya99999]

If I wanna ask my crush out, i'd probably wear revealing clothes that shows my leg

[NicholasRedone]

Gasp 1800s "lady, you're showing your leg" 😲

[Priya99999]

@NicholasRedone well I'm Indian and women wear skirts and scarfs so leg would be prone to revealing...🙂

[Clyde_123]

Nothing I dont really approach guys.

[KrakenAttackin]

They make eye contact for 1.3 seconds.

[liabalia]

Be hot

[chocolatetwopointo]

nothing tbh

[KittygosMeoWW]

Nothing