Did I over react?

[Anonymous]

So I had this friends with benefits. We were good. No strings attached. I got it. He’s text me every day with stupid memes or to check up on me etc. if he didn’t message me I didn’t reach out to him. We got close, at least I think we did? If I had issues like needing a jump for my car or anything else he’d be there but I’d never call him to let him know. I’d call someone else. He’d be upset about it. Asking why I didn’t reach out to him etc. I just didn’t feel right leaning on him like that. Last Thursday he came by. He stays for awhile after. He’ll just talk. But he’s been talking about his ex a lot. How she’s a drunk, won’t change, but she always makes good money that she never cooked but she has two kids he’d buy food for every week etc. he said her daughter really got attached to him. He’d talk about her a lot with me. Then he went on saying how he dosent want a relationship because he’s happy where he’s at he’s able to buy another car, he’s saving up for a house etc. and with a girl he can’t do that. Because he’d have to take care of her. That his ex always took his money etc. I never asked for his money or anything I don’t even ask him for help when my car breaks down but he’ll get upset if I don’t messaged him. I ghosted him that night. Because if it was the other way around I’d never talk about another man in his bed. I don't know just disrespectful. Because at that moment I’m all about him. But it’s like it all built up. Of hearing about what she’d make him after they had s** and I should make it next time. He said he hated drama and we’re cool friends with benefits but I don’t think I’m this cool. So I just ghosted. Did I overthink? Or am I just getting withdrawals of always having him to message me to nothing?

[Anonymous]

So if you don’t want him venting to you about his ex then why not just communicate that or ask him not to do it rather than ghost? Are you afraid of showing even the slightest drop of care because of what your arrangement is meant to be? Your still supposed to be friends, he vented to you like a friend, just not at the best time and you could’ve told him that.

[Asker]

That was a huge one as well, but another situation that kinda got to me was he’d be frustrated when I’d have an issue and wouldn’t go to him about it but then he talks about how women in his passed always just used him and I didn’t wanna step in that line. So I didn’t go to him for stuff but with his getting upset with me for not it kinda just got to me. Including him sending me cheesy songs and doing other gestures that blurred the lines.

[Opinion Owner]

When he talked about being used it was probably in reference to money and excess favors. If you’re having an issue with your car and he can help that’s entirely different. That’s what friends do. I don't know what else you’ve asked him for, that was the only instance I read in your post, but regardless I’m sure you’re not turning around all the time asking for things, I’m sure that’s what he was talking about.

[Asker]

I supposed I did over react, but if I’m over reacting now on such a small matter it’s best if I do ghost, rather then develop more whatever this is and allowing all the small things to get to me. He clearly has his mind set. Seems as if I have more growing to do.
Thank you

[jahaims]

friends with benefits are for people who aren't emotionally healthy enough for a proper relationship but still try to get their needs met

[seeyounexttuesday]

you're a cumdumpster for him. Nothing more. Why would you get possessive?

[seeyounexttuesday]

@Biricik so then know your place.

[Asker]

Was that being possessive? Damn then maybe it was a good thing I ghosted now

[MasterKS]

friends with benefits is only for sex.