Is love a feeling or a choice?

Question

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

Both to a extent just remember don’t get too carried away in emotions. Trust me emotions are a powerful thing to have and can be a really good thing in the right relationship.

But sometimes it can be deceitful someone can look really good and put a dog and pony show on. Just to find out later that someone isn’t a good person and they aren’t really who they seem to be.

You can definitely see red flags and exit a relationship no matter how you may feel in the moment. Someone can start being super toxic and if you have normal emotions you can’t just automatically flip off loving them. You will need to grieve…. But you can put boundaries and leave the relationship. Despite loving that man (or woman) in that moment. But later on. You will be happy and glad you did.

HawkPerception · Accepted Answer

I genuinely believe it's a feeling. People can be toxic to you and you can still love them and want the best for them. You may not even want to. At that point, it's not your choice, so it has to be a feeling.

ohsheeT · Answer

It's both. And that's why it's so powerful  My belief , if you believe in a god. That is the next most powerful thing on this planet. It is like infinity.
Pure so beautiful and I'm a firm believer, that's why we are all here to get to that point. It's either like yes or no  When it's yes, there's nothing they can stop it. It's unconditional it is pure  And that is a choice that we make each and every day that's why we have to love ourselves. First to understand this , how much are we willing to take before , say , no I can't do it no more  Or you understand it so well that you don't let it bother you. You understand that you cannot control anybody else. You cannot you have to understand that. They are what they are what they feel is on them  But it's all about s as individuals
My choice is to love everybody into you. Give me a reason not to but even then I can walk away and still love you There is a bond when you love somebody that you make a choice.
To either keep loving them and levying everything slide. As long as they're not harming you are you say enough is enough you make a choice, and with that choice, you are creating yourself
 You're taking a stand on who you are in life.
 And how far you will allow things to go or not go, that's why I keep saying it's so powerful, but you have to love yourself first to understand all of this. This is a great question  You have to understand there are so many different types of love. That's what makes it so difficult for us sometimes. But when you can understand who you are love yourself so deeply that nothing can bother you anymore, you don't allow drama, you don't allow little piddly things interfere in your life. Because you know exactly who you are and how much you will tolerand how. Deep that goes   Every girl that I've ever been with and we've broke up. I can still say that I still love them. Because that's the way we ended it. My ex, wife, I love her to appoint. It's a very small point l o l but I don't like her. That's my choice. She did a lot of evil things to me. That were totally uncalled for and nothing but a big lie And I had to accept it as it was happening to me just because I did not want my son to see anger. I had to teach him how to act or who is something like this ever happened to him But he knew the truth , he found out the truth and I feel sorry for his mother , because I told her she kept doing what she was doing , he was going to grow up to hate her , he would find out the truth and not by me , and that's what happened , he didn't find it out by me , but her parents anyway , that's not part of the question everybody sees love differently , so love is how you make it  I believe when you totally find yourself and become who you are meant to be.
 Love is energy. Love is spiritual. Love. Is the universe? It is pure and beautiful, and we all need to have it. If we don't, we are miserable. That's why we have to have it within ourselves. First

Pearl222 · Answer

Falling in love is a feeling, staying is a choice. Because the staying part actually takes effort and intention.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Its a choice.. I watch the YouTube channel of a guy who was diagnosed with anti-social personality disorder.. Basically he's a real pyschopath.. He went to prison for almost killing his father with a hammer because his father was restricting his "awesomeness" in his words..

This man became a Christian and now his a wife and kids and he recognizes that he was a horrible person.. But he still doesn't feel emotions like a regular person and yet he has love in him.. It's not because he feels it, it's because he feels a duty to his wife, kids, his friends and his loved ones.. Despite the fact that he may not feel gushy feelings towards his wife, he still choices to stay with her and help to raise his kids in what I would assume is a fairly healthy household.. Deep feelings can be involved with love, but ultimately I feel like it's what you do when you don't feel deep feelings that really tells if you truly love someone or not..

Are you gonna be there as much as you can during the times when you feel like walking away.. Are you dead tired and just wanna lay down, but still go to your children's games because you at least want them to know you're there? That's love to me.. That's a choice..

RandomGirl42 · Answer

I don't know why this is confusing me so much but I am taking it in circles hard. Like, when I fell in love with my partner, I just fell in love. It didn't seem like much choice. But I must have made the choice to love in there somewhere to begin with, right? I often run my mouth by saying "All is choice" but now when I have to back it up I'm not sure if I can.

I don't know if I can separate them. Oh, this is confusing. Good thing I'm not on a gameshow with this question popping up.

Keyboardkat · Answer

Love usually starts as a feeling. But love really is a choice. It's a choice that says, "I choose you today, and I will continue to choose you into the future, even when neither of us is so attractive anymore." If it's just feelings, and that's all, remember, feelings are changeable, and not to be trusted. One day the person feels one way about you, and the next day, they can feel the opposite way.

CalmUntilAbused · Answer

It's obviously a choice. The reason for the confusion is that infatuation (a feeling) is commonly mistaken for love. Love is eternal, infatuation only lasts as long as the hormones are in an uproar.

Anonymous · Answer

Well it's a "choice" that you make (most of the times unconsciously) to focus on the persons good things and kinda ignore or be blind for the flaws.
Thing is, when we get used to the person we tend to stop doing this and then suddenly the person isn't perfect in your eyes anymore.

But since it starts in your mind (yeah... not your heart but your mind), you can "choose" to start doing it again.

My marriage of 20+ years proves that.

Bitter_Sweet94 · Answer

Honestly, it’s both.

The feeling is what pulls you in at the beginning.

The choice is what keeps the relationship alive when real life shows up.

Without the feeling, it’s forced.

Without the choice, it doesn’t last.

BCRanger10 · Answer

There is an emotional component to it in the context of romantic relationships, but ultimately, it is a choice.

CherryLove007 · Answer

Love is a delightful feeling for an animal, human and mother earth. Or some people love their car and even marry it too.

serious · Answer

Well, according to me. It is certainly a choice because I am a very logical and rational person. I am only speaking for myself.

sage2021 · Answer

I believe it is a lot of feelings and not a choice. That's why they say that we can't help who we fall in love with.🙂

Tarifa · Answer

It's a predisposition. If you're not ready and open for it, you won't get very far if you're not willing to accept it.

whiskeyontherocks · Answer

It’s a construct of your imagination kinda like a feeling. I have never really believed in love. Just a collection of characteristics that make up a person I want to be with I’ll admit I might be on the spectrum.

Still-alive · Answer

it's a bit of both. you need to feel the attraction to a person or it isn't gonna work. and you still need your wits about you when you are dating a person so you don't fall for someone who ends up being toxic or bad for you. so both

luvstoned4him · Answer

Definitely a choice. Its like you see the worst parts of someone and then choose to love em anyway

Spencer10 · Answer

I think its both... you have to allow yourself to be open to love first of all. Once there its a feeling that just envelopes you.

abbyjgriffin98 · Answer

I believe love is a feeling. But staying faithful is a choice.

FreyaRed · Answer

Both. You make a choice to feel, because if you choose not to feel, you won't do.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Love starts as a largely involuntary feeling.

WhitneySnow · Answer

A feeling but you can choose not to act on it

YourExLover69 · Answer

It's a choice where you have no other choice... It's a feeling where you don't have any feelings for anyone else.

Anonymous · Answer

It's a feeling, you can't choose love at first sight, it just happens.

Even if it's not at first sight, some people can fall in love later, because they subsequently start feeling something, so it's still a feeling.

BarryLiverstone · Answer

Love is a gift from God. It’s a feeling but can chose to accept it or deny it depending on the circumstance.

Shiprex · Answer

It's a feeling that grows if fed and nurtured.

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

Love is a feeling but people choose whether to surrender to it or not.

genericname85 · Answer

it's a choice that comes with a complex mix of feelings.

KostasKouvalis · Answer

definitely feeling. I don't know how it can be a choice

WonderingManII · Answer

I think it can start off as a feeling but then turns into a choice.

Anonymous · Answer

It’s a choice obviously. Love is choosing someone again and again. Feelings are lust and temptation. Love is sacrifice, trust , and action

Dina88 · Answer

Both feel for someone but they can be in a relationship.

Nice222 · Answer

Love is a feeling. Usually pain… but sometimes it’s a good feeling too.

Andi_Fem · Answer

It may start as a feeling, but it becomes a choice.

MemeSupreme · Answer

feeling but your choices influence it tho

katiesmuff · Answer

In my opinion I think it is a bit of both!

Phoenix98 · Answer

In a sense it's both.

exitseven · Answer

It is a feeling. You cannot choose it.

MannMitAntworten · Answer

It’s a momentary lapse of reason.

animesenpai · Answer

Love is evolving and fluid

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

A combination of both

LiamJHayden · Answer

The choice to seek the better for another.

jazzy34 · Answer

A choice.

Unap0logetic_ · Answer

A choice.

Anonymous · Answer

Feeling

dudeinohio · Answer

I think a feeling

Is love a feeling or a choice?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said