Why All Girl Schools Are Bad For a Girls Confidence


Why All Girl Schools Are Bad For a Girls Confidence

While I think that having the option of going to a girls school is good, especially in places rampant with sexism and violence against women, girls schools don’t have much of a place in modern society.

I went to an all girls school my whole life (13 years) and while the education was good quality the social aspect was wanting. Most girls in my class had never had a friendship with a man and felt a lot of anxiety when talking to men. It was because since there were no boys around, guys were made into this idolized being that seemed unreal to all of us.

The only daily experiences we had were in novels and with male family/teachers. But in real life one can’t live their life never interacting with men and being unable to do so comfortably really put loads of us at a disadvantage. Girls schools advertise as being an option that increases a girls confidence and better prepares her for life but it in many ways simply doesn’t.

Common fears at my school was the worry that they would go to college a virgin and that men would find them less appealing. Sex Ed was also very lacking as most girls schools are run like a business and if conservative families sent their daughters to the school we had to be conservative in order to please them. So there was no condom on a banana or even an explanation of consent or positive relationships.

When I talked with the head of school she told me that girls learnt differently and that our minds worked in a different way. She said that it’s better for us to learn using examples of ballerinas in physics than to use football examples since it was easier for us to comprehend.

Having opportunies for women is important and they should exist at every school. All girls schools are harmful for girls who spent their whole lives in their bubbles and I could go on forever with how that has made real life harder for me. (I could make an entire post about the issues for LGBTQ students at my school but I’ll leave that out for now).

While the option for an all girls school should exist it is important for girls to know that they are not what they are cracked up to be.

Why All Girl Schools Are Bad For a Girls Confidence
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Most Helpful Girls

  • laurieluvsit
    One of my girlfriends went to an all girls catholic school that her conservative rich parents sent her to to keep her away from sex and boys. It had two effects on her socially. Fist, she became infatuated with girls because she was around so many all the time and had only them to interact with. In talking about boys, they began developing a strong bond with one another emotionally leading her, and many of the other girls, into a physical bonding, sometimes known as lesbianism. And for her, it also had a second effect. Because of the lack of camaraderie with boys, she became infatuated with them as well, desiring an emotional and physical bond as a result of being kept from them, also know as bisexuality. I am thinking that the end result is not quite what her parents had in mind, but it did manifest itself that way. Does this make any sense from what you saw, or experienced, Ms Nathalie?
    Is this still revelant?
    • That's a quite interesting observation i must say.

  • pooonmyleg
    I think all boys schools are good for boys though. They can flourish away from the female centric education system and not get raped by their creepy 35 year old teachers trying to relive their high school years.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Meh, having went through an all-boys prep school that was like "Lord Of The Flies" or "The Chocolate War", I can't agree. If the crappy education is leftist femme-centric, that's the fault of the ideology, not the gender. I can't say gender apartheid was good for me.

    • @Curmudgeon Are you one of those guys that's like "I wish that was me" when a female teacher gets arrested for banging her students?

    • Meh. I don't recall any teachers ever that young!

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guys

  • ryancg
    I get what you're saying, but as far as the social aspect, I don't think it's a school's job to teach kids how to socialize, that responsibility falls on the parents and/or other family members. In Chattanooga, where I grew up, we had the McCallie school for boys and GPS for girls, and they regularly interacted with one another, joint events and clubs and whatnot. So none of those boys and girls were lacking when it came to socializing with the opposite sex, but they also didn't have to worry about being distracted by one another during school hours. As for me, I went to a co-ed private school, but I also had a lot of friends at both McCallie and GPS, and they seemed pretty well adjusted to me.
    Is this still revelant?
  • Anonymous
    Here's the other side of that coin. Coed schools are terrible for boys because they are tailored to the needs of girls, NOT boys. Boys and girls are different... they learn differently and they have different needs with respect to the ideal learning environment. In the US the public school system ignores boys' needs, which is why 75% or failing grades go to boys. And it's why fewer than 40% of university students and graduates at all levels are males now, and that number continues to drop.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Meh, having went through an all-boys prep school that was like "Lord Of The Flies" or "The Chocolate War", I can't agree. If the crappy education is leftist femme-centric, that's the fault of the ideology, not the gender. I can't say gender apartheid was good for me.

    • Anonymous

      @Curmudgeon Of course it's the fault of the ideology. The US school system is controlled by feminism.

    • Anonymous

      By the way, sorry your experience was a bad one. I know some all-boys schools are not great. But some are. My father's experience in his was very positive.

      The point, of course, is that boys' needs need to be served, and US public schools fail them badly in that regard.

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

    I don’t think they are bad for a girls confidence, I have had amazing experiences.
  • ronaldo75
    Make up for your fucking minds. If they go to co-ed school and boys call them ugly, it's fat-shaming. If they go to co-ed schools and boys call them cute, it's rape. Now if they go to all girls schools they'll develop anxiety around men. Which one is it?
  • karabird
    I actually found that a girl's school was great for my confidence. I went to a mixed secondary school (I'm British btw) and tbh it destroyed my mental health; the environment is very different. It seems like when girls and boys are together (especially at that age of 11-16) the majority become competitive and are more focused on impressing the other sex/what the other sex think of them, and if you're one not to care you end up being picked on (like the saying the nail that sticks out gets hammered down). I noticed a lot of hostile & judgmental behaviour.
    When I transferred to a girls 6th form (16-18) to do my A levels, yes everyone was more mature, but the environment was entirely different. Everyone was just so supportive and friendly towards each other regardless of friendship groups. No problem with sex education either, in a lot of ways it was better because girls could relate and have meaningful conversations about things they were concerned about without worrying that a group of immature guys at the back of the class would start laughing at them or something. And I'm sure some guys felt the same about the girls being there.
    We had a couple of events with a local boy's school and I noticed right away how the dynamic changed. Of course it's natural especially at that age, but it definitely wasn't good for my confidence. And at *school when the goal is to learn*, it's a major distraction and set back in my opinion.
  • Pineapple_Boy
    It may be bad for you , but not other girls. In my country, the top schools are all single sex. It doesn't have any negative effects on girls or boys. In fact most of the violence in schools here are in the coed schools where girls fight eachother to get guys.
    • kaylaS91

      may I ask which country you live in?

  • 0112358
    I think there's some good data showing girls actually tend to perform better in single sex schools. The data for boys is more mixed.

    I went to an all boys high school, and the social impact sucked, and I think is a negative.

    I know some schools exist where they have some mixed classes, more single sex classes, but mixed lunch/etc. I think that might be best for some students.

    The lack of sex ed is a problem of a too conservative school, which can happen with co-ed or single sex.
  • Kayla45
    I think all girl schools are totally boring! I was in one in middle school and craved boys like crazy! I'm not a slut or anything like that, just interaction with a guy everyone in a while is nice you know?

    Good myTake!
  • TacosRAwesome
    I went to a mixed school from ages 3 - 10 and switched to a girls only school between 10 and 16. Most of my classmates had contact with young males and the ones that didn't was because they were either shy or had cobtrilling parebts. i
  • DeeDeeDeVour
    @NathaliePruden: I have numerous girl friends that graduates from exclusively-female schools who are very confident and successful.
    • I meant "I have numerous girl friends that graduateD from..."

  • levantine99
    better than hoes fishing for attention with yoga pants and thongs and distracting male classmates and causing drama. i support the morality of separate schools.
  • Dim1213
    Honstly the same for homeschool but given the choice I would be homeschooled over public school. Cause I learned nothing in public school.
  • He-Loves-Me-Not
    I’d probably understand a football analogy better then a ballet analogy. What’re they talking about? 😂
  • simplyaramdomgirl
    My whole life I went to co-ed schools, so I can't ever imagine how you feel going to a single-sex school. If I had kids I don't think I'd ever send them to a same-gender school. It's important to interact with the opposite sex because in real life society doesn't work with sex divisions. I wouldn't send them to boarding school either. I feel like coming home after school and detaching yourself from the school's environment is an important part of your development as an adult-to-be. In my opinion co-ed schools are great. Single-sex just lets kids live in an imaginary bubble that is bound to pop one day and not in the best ways.
  • abundantlyrich
    Promotes more negativity and bullying in my opinion
  • arcanemontane
    I could never go to an all girl school. There's enough bitchiness in co-ed schools
  • Curmudgeon
    Having went through an all-boys prep school that was like "Lord Of The Flies" or "The Chocolate War", I agree. Oddly enough, my school WAS full of female teachers. The problem was with the boys who spent their time beating up upon each other in the name of "School Spirit". With girls around, said thugs could preoccupy themselves with the girls and leave me and other friends alone. I can't say gender apartheid was good for me.


    • Caaarl

      I loved going to an all boys school personally. It was like hanging with the bros all the time.

    • Caaarl

      Almost all teachers were male and i felt they related to me better.

    • @Caaarl Your mileage may vary, as the auto ads go. For some, it might be just the thing.

  • Comawhite666
    I disagree, I went to 2 all girls schools (they were the best schools and closest to me~ one was a secondary school and one was a 6th form) and I didn't get my first boyfriend until I was 18, I never felt shy around guys at all, they're just people. I went to uni and made friends who are guys. Most of my friends are the same, the only ones who struggled were the ones who were already shy in an all girls school. Neither were conservative at all, though one was a little more strict as it was a grammar school.
  • VixenRach
    Co-ed is definitely a better represention of real life
  • demonics
    Why are co-ed schools are destroying boys lives before they even start."
  • zagor
    Worried about going to college a virgin? Yeah, that's not a problem, that can be taken care of the first week of college.
  • MarketData
    Keeping boys and girls separate never has a good outcome.
  • LegateLanius
  • LimitedBenefits
    i dont think they are bad
  • CoffeeWC
    Both types of schools have their own problems
  • real_real_Aji
    Here here!
  • Anonymous
    why is it bad?
  • Anonymous
    • Anonymous

      "In her book "Same, Different, Equal: Rethinking Single-Sex Schooling," Rosemary Salomone of St. John's University said "all-girls settings seem to provide girls a comfort level that helps them develop greater self-confidence and broader interests, especially as they approach adolescence."

    • Anonymous

      What research are you using? Or are you relying on your antidotal experience?

  • Anonymous
    I went to an all boys school. It was a serious mistake.
  • Anonymous
    my mom went to an all girls school and so did my aunts and my uncles went to all boys schools. i think they turned out alright dont worry about it :). you'll be fine
  • Anonymous
    Nice taken
  • Anonymous
    I had a different experience. Girls do better in all girl schools in my opinion. Boys are a distraction
  • Anonymous
    Had 22 years of life in different unisex institutions...
  • Anonymous
    My panties would be so wet if I went to an all girls school!!!
  • Anonymous
    I don't agree. How else are girls going to learn to take dick?
    • Actually, that means you DO agree, but fun and joke aside...

    • Anonymous

      @Curmudgeon it wasn't a joke. Girls are wh**es at college

    • When they aren't man-hating dykes. :D

  • Anonymous
    A school for all girls or all guys can be fine, but really only if done correctly. Your school seems a bit off if they tell you physics examples for girls need to be with "ballerinas" and guys with "football." I could think of a billion better ways to make shit more neutral and enjoyable. I never got physics much, but one thing that did stick was potential and kinetic energy with an example I crafted myself: A roller coaster track has a piece missing right after the top part. The roller coaster hits that area but right before, the panicked people inside (boys, girls, kids, trans, bi, gay, polyandrous, doesn't matter, all of em) have _________ energy and as they fall out to their deaths they develop _______ energy. See? Making it neutral AND realistic isn't too hard. Nothing like death to get kids excited about science. Why encourage ballet and football in which the pros of both don't do much for society except suck money away as people starve elsewhere? A good fix is to not make it feel so much like a girls or boys school, but just like a co-ed school but without certain people. Or else, yah, there is going to be that "bubble" issue that will explode and if you have a dirty mind like me, that particular "bubble" will then become a fetus and then eventually, a unwanted baby society pays for. Being away from the opposite sex for a LONG time and then pushed together suddenly when older... it doesn't matter how religious or how much of a "pure boy" or "pure girl" one is, it only takes an ounce of stupidity for a big wonderful accident to pop out. An ounce usually meaning much more than an ounce but more like a few "first time" cans a beer at a first party while parents don't know and condoms aren't a thing known about sadly. Another physics lesson, same concept. Rubber bands = human minds. Prevent something so hard usually means it's just wanted more. Newton's law. In conclusion, if you are going to have single sex schools, do it right or don't do it at all! We have enough humans in the world. We only have room for so many more, especially accidental ones. If you go to a school that's single sex, than that school better fuckin make up for it somehow or the schools gonna have to pay for these unwanted babies from it's burned down/sold remains!