How to stop being sensitive?

[Anonymous]

I have been struggling with low self esteem for as long as I can remember. And now that I'm graduating, adult life is not very far away. I don't think it will get any better. I am very good at writing but when it comes to speaking I'm basically stuttering or not finding the right words. Many jobs include speaking with costumers and I don't think I will be able to do that. I already tried with a small job where i had to communicate with costumers and because of my trashy communication skills, I came off as rude (my co worker got mad at me and I had issues because of it, even if it was unintentional and I didn't mean to be rude) and got fired. I am really bad at many things no matter how hard I try. I try to understand things but I just can't. Sometimes I am very good at completing tasks but often I'm just dumb and slow. School is okay and I would do anything to stay here for another year. I am an overthinker and I hate doing mistakes (doesn't even make sense because i am chaotic and unorganized and lazy). I always get told to try to communicate more, but i have my family and friends, also i talk with many people and teachers at school with no problems. In public, at restaurants and especially in working places, it's very different. I'm a whole different person there. Okay, I am basically repeating everything i'm saying, which is useless so I'll stop here. Please I need tips on how to stop doing stupid things.

[JSmith925]

You need to see a speech therapist for your stuttering. Depending on your income level, you may be able to find assistance with the cost. James Earl Jones had such a persistent stutter that he barely spoke from first grade through his freshman year of high school. Yet he is now famous and respected for his acting and speaking abilities.

The things you do that you call “stupid” almost surely have nothing to do with your intelligence, which I suspect is above normal. Probably, you get nervous and overcompensate. The best thing to do when you start feeling flustered is to breathe deeply and give yourself a few moments to think. Then, no matter what situation you are facing, react with patience and kindness. Continue being sensitive, just extend it to those around you by imagining what it might be like to be in theirs shoes. By focusing on others, you will feel less self-conscious.

Before long, people will see you as wise and confident. And eventually, you will realize that you have become what they perceive.

[LiamS95]

Honey the more you try talking to people the better you'll get at it. You might need someone to practice with or possibility a coach. I regularily have to give pitches to a conference room full of executives or board members, one trick is to remember they don't know how much you know and assume you know more then them. Generally. They won't challenge you fir fear of making a fool of themselves in front of their peers. I'd be glad to chat with you anytime I'm available.

[LiamS95]

Feel free to dm me anytime.

[LiamS95]

My offer of help still stands.

[Asker]

I can't send a message

[Anonymous]

Growing up and stepping into adulthood is scary, but it’s something we all must inevitably face. You are going to set yourself up for a lot of anxiety, stress and depression if you keep thinking like this and telling yourself what you can’t do. Because a lot of the jobs available to you right now involve things you don’t want to do, like being social and NO you don’t have to be perfect at it. You’d be surprised at what people mentally go through just to get to work in the morning or every day in general for jobs they suck at and hate. It’s hard but that’s why you have things that take away from work, like a social life, friends, activities, things that give you purpose outside of work. Even better when you can find a job you enjoy but you won’t know what that is until you’re working more.

[Nikki1989]

Find the root cause. Are there recurring themes in your reactions? Do certain experiences contribute to your sensitivity?

[AI Opinion]

First, recognize that many people struggle with similar feelings of sensitivity and low self-esteem, particularly when transitioning into adulthood. Focus on your writing strengths by considering roles that emphasize this skill. Practice public speaking in low-stakes settings to build confidence slowly. Joining groups like Toastmasters can improve communication skills. Also, mindfulness techniques can help manage overthinking. Remember, mistakes are learning opportunities, not failures. Structuring your tasks can enhance organization. Progress, not perfection, is key. Seek feedback from mentors you trust, and consider professional support like a therapist if needed. Celebrate small victories on your journey towards growth.

[StevenMcGarrett]

Hmm, maybe try to find a work at home job that doesn't require much talking? If you can talk to your family and friends okay, maybe just practice? Seeing a therapist should help. Good luck.