10 Ways Movies Get Relationships Wrong

10 Ways Movies Get Relationships Wrong

Yes, I know, we all know, movies are supposed to be pure fantasy, especially many romantic ones or ones that depict couples. That's why some of us enjoy them, because it's total escapism. But, for the fun of it, let's take a stab at how movies get real world relationships wrong.

1. Everyone meets by a crazy accident

OMG, BAM! The quirky secretary and the gym addicted ad exec run into each other on Main Street. He spills his coffee on her and hilariously tries to wipe it off her. She realizes when she goes to help pick up his bag, that his gym membership card has slipped out, and ooo it's the same gym she just also happens to be on her way to attend a class he just happens to be trying for the first time at the suggestion of his friend who happens to be her brother. Cut to, and then they get married. Of all the couples I have known in my entire life, none of them have met by pure crazy accident. They may have met at school, work, dating site, introduced by friends, but all this 'and then their eyes met,' I'm sure happens to some people, but not at a rate of 98% of couples the way it's depicted in the movies.

10 Ways Movies Get Relationships Wrong

2. One huge romantic gesture solves everything

Did movie you cheat on your spouse and lie about it for 6 months knocking up your mistress and then after being kicked out, break in and fill your soon to be ex's apartment with roses and she took you back? Ugh, somethings no amount of money or flash mobs can fix the way they seem to be able to in the movies. People F-up, and they can f-up really badly and to think that singing a song or throwing a bunch of flowers at the problem is supposed to fix everything instantaneously is pretty much delusional thinking. Not saying people don't work things out, even in the worst situations, but it's pretty much never solved just like that.

3. Stalking is A-okay as long as you like the person

Hiding out in the bushes, just showing up repeatedly at someone's school, home, or job, following them in your car, hacking their email, leaving tons of messages...is creepy. In movies/tv they paint these situations as really romantic. Some guy or girl just wants to get to know you better and the only way the lovable goofs can is if they follow you around until surprised by this loving gesture, you become a couple. Nope. Not cool. You persist at this in real life, you'll likely have a restraining order put on you or worse.

10 Ways Movies Get Relationships Wrong

4. Relationships solve everything

If you are clinically depressed, you're out of work, you're in debt, you have issues getting close to people, you're dealing with childhood trauma...yeah,those things don't magically get solved when someone says, you want to be in a relationship with me. You really do have to work on you at some point because joining in a partnership with someone else and expecting as in a movie, that life magically becomes wonderful and carefree after that, is not going to happen. Your baggage is still your baggage and that other person can't solve all your problems just be coupling up with you.


5. Life between the sheets is always magical

Oh yes, oui, oui, she has a stunning face of make-up and her $1,000 French lace lingerie on, and he has abs rippling and the wind wafting through his flowing hair betwixt the light of 250,000 candles and then it happens. It is glorious. Magical. Long lasting. Both of you climax at the same exact times and are ready to go again. Yup, that's what happens every time. Ev-er-y time.

10 Ways Movies Get Relationships Wrong

6. Everyone eventually falls in love

It's fate in movies that no matter who you are, there is someone out there for you and all you have to do is open your eyes or stop looking and they will appear....errr...the reality is, there are a lot of people who never get their fairy tale ending and movies and tv's hammer it home that unless you are in a happy long lasting marriage and pop out a few kids, your life is absolutely positively meaningless and all single people are ever, is pathetic and lonely. Ouch! Also not true for every person.


7. You can change your partner into the person you want

So what if movie guy has slept with every girl in the office or the movie girl is anti-social and doesn't like to hang with big crowds. Just by introducing these people to "the one," they will change every single character flaw about themselves to make themselves the eventual perfect match for the protagonist. All they have to do is show up, decide to date them after a few quirky interactions, and then they realize that changing everything about who they are is both easy and something they are willing to do at the drop of a hat to please a woman/man.

10 Ways Movies Get Relationships Wrong


8. Your friends/family are super involved in your relationship... and you want them to be

From even before you meet, your movie friends/fam are super involved in every detail of your love life and movie you enjoys that about them. They tell you what's wrong with you, how to fix you, how to hook up, how to date, guide you every single time you have a fight right back to her or him, and then when the going gets rough, they are super instrumental in getting you back together and make sure everything works out in the end, because relationships that go south, always work out in the end with the help of course of your movie fam/friends. Um, friends and fam are great in small doses, but if anyone's friends and fam were that involved in every second of their love life, you'd probably at some point very soon, be like back off or feel like they were treating you like a baby incapable of dealing with your own life or making your own decisions.

9.Everyone is super romantic literally all the time

Hey, don't get me wrong, I love a big romantic gesture, but movie characters go way over the top with it all the time with everything. Most people go out to dinner every once in a while, or go on a cool vacation, or maybe do the helicopter ride over a volcano like once in their lives, but like every day, every week? Who has the time or money to do all of that? Plus, why are the characters always home when the lover shows up. If you randomly decide to do something romantic on a Monday, why would anyone be home at 1pm when you decided to do it?

10 Ways Movies Get Relationships Wrong

10. Moving on after a break-up happens same day

Does that not strike you as suspicious if your friend who was married with kids for say 10 years, gets divorced and shows up literally the next day with a new boyfriend? I think they call that "Hamlet." Tv makes it seem like all one needs to do to forget the last however long they were in a relationship is just wake up and immediately move on. Even if the relationship sucked, post break-up most people are at minimum, a little bit raw. Hello, you were sharing your life with someone, living with them, maybe had some kids with them. Starting something the next day when you haven't sorted through any of the drama, doesn't really happen like that unless you dated someone on the short term.


7|3
1016

Most Helpful Guy

  • Good MyTake. I actually did meet my fiancé through a crazy accident and a lot of my problems I had really got solved through the relationship (my depression went away and I became far more confident) but it's true that this is probably not true in most cases.
    To be a little fair to the movie industry though, there are also films that depict love very realistically. The movies you are referring to are mostly kinda cheap and corny soap dramas.

    2|2
    0|0
    • You will definitely get more realistic movies in the drama category, but they're called drama for a reason, they are meant to depict drama. These are mostly what you find in Rom Coms or Romantic films. Glad things worked out for you. Now I'm curious about how you met by accident.

    • Show All
    • rich-neighborhood type of house that somebody would live in. Anyway, so my fiancé had gotten lost and was walking around, trying to find her building. I was on my way to class as well and walked through that public park because it is a shortcut from the tram stop. There was a small crossroad of the pebble paths and that's where we met. She came from one side, I came from another. As I passed by her, she called after me to ask if I knew where the building was that she had been looking for. Rather than just pointing directions, I offered to walk her there. When we got there, it turned out she had come on the wrong day because the class only took place bi-weekly. So I asked her if she would like to sit in my lecture with me... just for fun. Before saying bye after the lecture, I asked for phone number.
      There is so much coincidence in this... she could have looked at her schedule plan better and not come at all. Or she could have found the building herself. Or I could have taken (cont.)

    • a different route. Or my train could have been late, which would have made me miss my tram connection and I would've arrived 4 minutes later. Or she could have simply not asked me and asked another person. Or she could have rejected my offer to sit in my lecture together and just gone to her dorm again. There's so many variables ;-).
      And it actually gets even crazier than this: after I had her phone number, we both kinda forgot about each other again. Then, 2 weeks later, I was leaving a different university building on the other side of town. As I was walking out the door, I felt like somebody called my name. I first ignored it, then turned around. It was her. I was happy to see her and invited her for a coffee. She later told me that if I had walked out that door, she would have assumed I don't care about her anymore. So yeah... I don't believe in fate but somehow it almost feels a bit as though we were meant for each other ;-).

Most Helpful Girl

  • LOL! I'm glad you pointed out the stalking in movies. If that happened in real life, someone would be in jail.

    Also, the whole everyone is romantic. Yes, males can be romantic but most of them don't make posters with their feelings on it. Females don't even do that for the most part.

    Or at least I don't.

    1|0
    0|0

Recommended myTakes

Loading...

Join the discussion

What Guys Said 15

  • That women actually value niceness, compassion, sincerity, and respect on the part of a man. That the nice guy actually prevails in the end. The most toxic and destructive delusion that has ever been sold to men. The reason why I invested all of my money in designer clothing and a new asshole demeanor since it is what women really want.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It's really important to DISTINCT between REALITY and MOVIES. They aren't the same.
    Only idiots can't tell the difference.
    It may be okay to mimic certain parts from the movies but not make it like a movie itself. Movies are directed and scripted. Life is too but not in the way like the movies are.
    This is also why I avoid the media.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Those Hallmark movies are like that. Everybody is good looking, well dressed, no tattoos, and everything works out wonderfully at the end. Even the oddball outcast guy gets a girl.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Well to be fair most movies get relationships wrong.

    Except Noir movies those are fairly realistic as that is how relationships actually were back then and even now, plus in those there aren't always happy endings.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Casablanca is a good example because the guy doesn't get the girl in the end but rather sacrifices his love for her and himself for the greater good instead of throwing it all away for love.

  • That you can cheat on a man and he will take you back or a they you cheated with you will want to be with you seems to be a theme as well or the a woman can date two guys at the same time and the one she chooses will go along with it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • #9 Rick Grimes pre-Lori and zombie apocalypse. Thankfully now he's got Michonne. And they lived happily ever after...

    0|1
    0|0
  • That's why I never watch movies. Bollywood is even worse.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Most television shows and movies are not real in what real relationship show be. My relationship I had as a teenager and young adult till I got marry was base on God word in how my partner and I were to be. Now being married, our relationship is still base on God word in how I am to be a husband and her to be a wife, how we both are to be parents to our children. That why it very important what you are watching and listen to. It can and will cause issues in your life if not careful. Those romantic books that women like to read will screw your life up. My wife does not read them or look at women magazine. We watch, read, and listen to things that builds us.

    0|1
    0|0
  • BBBBUT guyys! not all romance movies are the same way, there are some more realistic

    0|1
    0|0
  • I hate these types of movies as they aren't what would happen in real life.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Really? Only ten?

    0|0
    0|0
  • 11. That love don't cost a thing

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yup girls seem to really believe this shit. Then spend years to decades figuring out that things aren't going to happen the way they imagine. Meanwhile many good men are left in the dust wondering why they don't measure up.

    Could we fuck up dating and relationships any more?

    I remember when I became single after being married for many years. My best friend (girl, lez) told me I was going to have so much fun dating. To her I was what every hetro girl wanted. Good looking, hard worker, romantic, manly, considerate...
    Turned out not to be fun at all.
    After years of dating and relaying the stories of my experiance to my buddy she finally said "thank god i don't have to date hetro women. Fuck that shit."
    Yes 6 years of bullshit. From the games to the entitlement to the unrealistic expectations (that by the way almost no women live up to themselves).
    It's so much fun I have given up entirely and would rather sit at home and watch Casablanca with a bottle of wine to remind me the heartbreak modern relationships offer and that women think I'm not good enough for them. 🙄

    0|0
    1|0
    • What sort of things did they do? If you don't mind me asking.

    • Show All
    • @Nyx_85 "People like that need to take time to figure their shit out before they involve others in their lives."
      Soooooo true!!!

    • Yeah I mean we all go through crap in our lives (unless we are lucky or sheltered) but there comes a point when we need to put on our big boy and big girl pants and stop being the victim. Stop treating others who had nothing to do with it like they somehow did. Like this one guy that I dated would constantly accuse me of cheating or say I was going to cheat. All because his ex did. I've never cheated in my life. I won't even dance with other guys. Let alone sleep with them! But he let his insecurities ruin our relationship.

  • Great take. #10 is spot on. I've dated two women that were on the rebound and both ended up being disasters. I had my first date with the 2nd rebound the same week her ex of 5 years moved out of her apartment which I found out late.

    She didn't really mention her ex that much but she still acted very hot and cold the whole time we dated. Then I found out she was sleeping around while I slept with her and then got kicked to the curb.

    I strongly advise against dating someone on the rebound because no matter how compatible you may seem, and I had a lot in common with her, they are not emotionally available and the more you see them, the more likely it is you'll get attached.

    Eventually it can put you in their shoes where you date others just to get over the person who used you as a rebound. It's a horrible position to be in because a rebounder can go back to their ex. You can't exactly go back to someone who used you as a rebound, especially if they were the one who cut ties.

    1|0
    0|0
    • I would also like to add that #10 also builds off #4 to a degree. If you're still hurt from a relationship or someone you dated and still have unresolved feelings for that person, dating someone else won't help you.

      It's basically putting a bandaid on cancer. You can try to suppress feelings all you want and appear happy on the outside, but deep down inside you still have feelings for that last person and dating someone else is just a distraction from the pain nothing else.

      I can say I've dated other women while being hung up on women that used me as a rebound and it sucked because they weren't relationships and you feel like no one can live up to the person you cared about. It's not fair to you or the other person.

    • Another point id like to add is that there's no perfect person or fairy tale relationship like the movies make it out to be.

      If something's too good to be true it is. Said girl I was talking about was knockout gorgeous and had a lot in common with me but then once I got to know her more, I found out she was on the rebound, a sociopath, very unstable, and a player. It was very toxic. I never thought she was perfect, but I was relieved to find someone with all those common interests and being really cute on top of it. I put up with her behavior which only got worse and it just goes to show that sometimes people with a lot in common aren't the best people for us.

  • Yep, you are totally right, I was in love four times in my life, but each time - it was unrequited love.
    That's why I stayed single, never been in a relationship, never had my first kiss, still a virgin in my late 30s :(

    0|2
    0|0

What Girls Said 9

  • 👏👏👏👏 this take is amazing. Why you on anon? You're so right. I love movies but this shit is ridiculous!!

    1|0
    0|0
    • Thanks. It is crazy all the stuff in movies that they can get away with, but again, we know, it's supposed to be make believe. As far as my Anon, well this was a mistake on this one. I was editing and clicking on stuff and clicked the Anon function I guess.

    • Ahh fair enough :) great take none the less!

  • I think that while ridiculous, that's part of the appeal of rom coms and movies in general: to escape our own realities for a little while and get totally immersed in a fictional story where everything plays out as it ideally should. As long we're able to differentiate between Hollywood and real life, I see no real harm in it. And every so often, someone just might come around and make you feel like you actually ARE in a movie from time to time. Hold out for that, kids.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I've never been into 'chick flicks'. Romance movies are a fantasy. They wouldn't be so popular if that is how real life was. It's the same thing as when a dude watches an action movie and wishes he could be the main character. Kicking ass and getting the hot babe. We all know it's not reality.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I'm very realistic about my relationships but I'm not gonna lie, when I was younger I was waiting for one of those epic romance movie moments. I measured my boyfriend's up to unattainable standards and was disappointed when they didn't meet them. I was waiting for some guy to chase down a moving train for me lol.

    0|0
    0|0
    • It's understandable. It's what's always portrayed on movies and tv, and especially in like the Disney movie where the couple are so cute and love each other and it always ends in a happy ending, but we live, love, and experience life and our own realities that either prove or demystify these movie moments for us.

  • This is so true. Unfortunately romance movies are the closest I'm getting to a relationship LOL

    2|1
    0|0
  • Ahahaha! I love this! Funny and sarcastic at the same time!

    1|0
    0|0
  • I loved this take so much! It's so true!!! <3 :-) <3

    0|0
    0|0
  • Lol that is quite true

    1|0
    0|0
  • They're wayyy too cheesy.

    0|0
    0|0

Recommended Questions

Loading...