In this past week, the first Mean Girls movie turned 15 years old. I can still vividly remember seeing that movie for the first time at a local Drive-In Theater when the movie had first came out to the public. After about 40 full viewings later, I have concluded that Mean Girls is the best quotable movie of all time.
No, not the best movie of all time-or even the best movie of the decade-but the best quotable movie of all time. In other words, I think that movie has the most memorable, and amazing quotes in any movie I've ever seen in my life. I mean, the movie is so fetch, and yes, I'm going to make fetch happen.
And this movie has inspired me to do my own obscure movie awards. These aren't the awards you will find in the Golden Globes, or even the MTV Movie/Music Awards. These are my own unique awards with their own holistic criteria which I came up with.
In the list below, explore my thoughts on the best movie for each completely random category.
The Best Summer Movie:
Criteria: A "Summer Movie" doesn't have to actually be released in the Summer Solstice(although many of them are). A "Summer Movie" is a movie which provokes the fondest memories many of us experience in the Summertime-which includes road trips, beaches, carnivals, amusement parks, Independence Day(at least here in the United States of America), Labor Day, and just hot, weather, and outdoor activities.
Movie Choice: National Lampoon's Vacation(1983)
I figure the best way to start off a list is by mentioning the obvious choice first, and keeping it short, and sweet. Was there really any question here? This Chevy Chase, Beverly DeAngelo, and Randy Quaid classic provoked rich nostalgia of every miserable(yet fun) road trip we ever had growing up. Hell, many people refer to this movie as "Summer Vacation", and this was the beginning of the best movie series of all time.
Honorable Mention: Without a Paddle(2004): There is just something about road trip style movies that bring out my inner-Summer love. Some people might have expected me to mention the movie It Runs in the Family(which was originally titled "A Summer Story", as a weak sequel to A Christmas Story).
The Best B-Movie
Criteria: A "B-Movie/Film" is defined as a "low-budget commercial motion picture that is not an Arthouse film. In its original usage, during the Golden Age of Hollywood, the term more precisely identified films intended for distribution as the less-publicized bottom half of a double feature." In other words, these are the movies we find on in the middle of the night, with some of the most atrocious acting of all time, and a generally considered terrible.
Movie Choice: Dead End(2003):
This French movie was released straight to DVD in 2003, and whether it was a hit, or not, I don't know.
All I know is I took a gamble with this movie on Netflix back in 2010, and it payed off. Despite starting off cheesy, it took off, and I couldn't quit watching it. It plays the Comedy-Horror movie genre very well, and the acting is surprisingly high quality. Plus, it was a twist for an ending, and it instantly makes you fall in love with. I highly recommend this to almost anyone.
Honorable Mention: Hell House LLC(2015): I rolled the dice with this movie on Amazon Prime four months ago, and this is still one of the scariest movies I've ever seen. It gave me chills the entire time.
The Best Autumn Movie
Criteria: Similar to the Summer Movie, the "Autumn Movie" doesn't necessarily have to be released in the Fall Solstice. It also doesn't have to deal with Halloween, or Thanksgiving(but many of them do), despite those being major holidays during this season. An Autumn Movie provokes the fond times we have spend during the Fall time, which includes Halloween, Thanksgiving, raking leaves, the changing of the colors, comfortable weather, hay rides, pumpkins, and bonfires.
Movie Choice: Pet Sematary(1989)
I've yet to see the remake of this movie which was recently released in theaters, but this movie captivated everything I loved(and was terrified about) when Fall rolls around.
Why is this movie Autumn in a nutshell?; Gloomier skies, yet, the weather is so comfortable, the changing of the colors on trees, a creepy cemetery(And house) to explore, and that bonfire/hot chocolate style nighttime love. Of course, it being a horror film reminds us of Halloween. It's just incredible all the way around for the Autumn season.
Honorable Mention: Rudy(1993): What is a better way to remind us of Fall than American Football, the "back to school" blues, and beautiful sunsets?
The Best Pixar Movie
Criteria: This one is pretty straightforward-the movie has to be produced by the Pixar Animation Studios. Since this is probably these are the most popular movie studios in the world, I decided to make it an award-based category too.
Movie Choice: Toy Story 3(2010)
This is the point of this list where I ruffle some feathers, because people treat Pixar like it's their religion.
With that out of the way, I did the unthinkable among movie fans-I picked a sequel as the choice, and it was the third sequel at that, mind you. At this point, Pixar Stans are probably firing their keyboards at my choice.
Yes, I didn't pick the first Toy Story movie. Not only do I not think the first one is the best Pixar movie, but I don't even have it as the second-best Pixar movie. The thing is, I saw the first movie in the series when I was about Andy's age. When the third one came out, I was a 19 year old who had just finished his first year of college. In other words, I grew up with Andy. I felt Andy. I knew who Andy was, and it was easy to relate to, especially as a 19 year old fresh adult. On top of this, this movie had the most twists, and suspenseful moments in the whole series. The ending was a tear-jerker, but it ended so well at the same time. When you relate to a movie so well, and you feel apart of that movie, it truly was the best Pixar movie to date for this very reason.
I'll be interested to seeing how Toy Story 4 plays out.
Honorable Mention: Monster's , Inc.(2001)
This movie is scarily accurate to how the modern day workforce is ran, from a metaphorical standpoint.
The Best Winter Movie
Criteria: On the same note with the Summer, and Autumn movies, the movie doesn't necessarily have to be released in the Winter Solstice. And again, it doesn't necessarily have to involve a Winter holiday,. The "Winter Movie" just has to provoke our fondest memories of the Wintetime, which includes Christmas, New Year's Day, Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Saint Valentine's Day, Saint Patrick's Day, snow, ice, cold weather, arctic terrain, coats, and lit fireplaces. All of these factors are our warmest Winter memories!
Movie Choice: A Christmas Story(1983)
I know, I know...I took the easy, and boring route, but what other choice could go in this spot?
It's actually not my favorite Christmas movie, but it is without a doubt my favorite Winter movie(and this is a tough one to debate against, but feel free).
Of course, the Christmas story this movie tells is a huge component of Winter, and the ironic thing is, we never even see New Year's Day, let alone the latter Winter holidays. However, mentioning the Christmas tale about a boy wanting his favorite present is just the tip of the iceberg.
This movie seemingly had everything we loved/dreaded about Winter as a kid-cranky teachers(due to the weather), calamity days from school, snowball fights, cold weather, excessive mall trips(since we didn't go outside much), sledding, and every other Wintry spirit mood. This movie is a symbolization of Winter, and that's something we could all relate to growing up as a kid in the Winter.
Honorable Mention: The Shining(1980): In the most twisted way, this brings out some fond Winter memories.
The Best Baseball Movie
Criteria: The movie has to revolve around the sport baseball. It can be any level of baseball, and it can be serious, funny, dark, romantic, or any other genre, as long as it primarily deals with baseball.
Movie Choice: Field of Dreams(1989)
Even though baseball is my favorite sport, and there are many high quality baseball movies, this was an easy choice.
There are good baseball movies, great baseball movies, amazing baseball movies, and then there is Field of Dreams.
The movie will make almost any baseball fan, or former baseball player emotional. It takes us back to the good ol' days of the game, and gave us some of the best movie quotes of all time too. The ending is so hard to watch, but it's so beautiful at the same time.
Honorable Mention: The Sandlot(1993): Was this not our childhood in the 1990s?
The Best Spring Movie
Criteria: Again, it doesn't have to be released in the Spring Solstice. The "Spring Movie" is to provoke our fondest moments of the Springtime, which include breezy days, sunshine, rain, flowers, Easter, Mother's Day, the excitement when Winter breaks out, baseball, parks, and walking.
Movie Choice: Jeepers Creepers(2001)
It's interesting how some of the most eerie movies can trigger those deep memories for the seasons we adore.
In this movie, the road trip is between a brother, and sister, and they are excited because the weather is no longer bitter-cold, and they can enjoy the changing of the season. On this note, it's a beautiful Spring Day-just for the creature to come out every 23rd Spring for 23 days,. This movie has Spring written all over it.\
Honorable Mention: Field of Dreams(1989): This is the first time I've double-dipped, but it's such a great movie for provoking those fond baseball memories in the Springtime.
Best Football Movie
Criteria: The movie has to primarily revolve around the sport of American Football(NOT soccer). Once again, the general genre doesn't matter.
Movie Choice: Varsity Blues(1999)
Once again, this is a sport I love, and there are so many amazing football movies, but back in 2015, I finally decided to watch this movie, and it's already an all-time favorite me for me.
The movie captivates the football experience, and Jon Voight is a cruel example of a high school football coach gone mad. It makes me wonder how accurate this was compared to the traditional high school experience in the 1990s.
Rest in peace Paul Walker, and Ron Lester.
Honorable Mention: Rudy(1993): Once again, it's a movie many athletes can relate to, and it's nice seeing the underdog win in a movie.
Most Overrated Movie of All Time
Criteria: The movie has to be widely considered a high-tier movie, from Film Critics, movie fans, directors, actors/actresses, and the film industry in general.
Movie Choice: Titanic(1997)
If you search this movie online, it's hard to find anything negative about it. From Film Critics, it received excellent reception, and they still rave about it. According to the film industry, virtually every director, actor/actress praises this film. Rotten Tomatoes, the famous critique website, gives this movie a 90 percent. On top of this, almost every casual fan instantly fell in love with this movie.
While it does star Leonardo DeCaprio, who will go down as one of the greatest actors of all time, an amazing actor in a movie doesn't make a movie great(the same way an elite athlete doesn't make a team great). The movie is cheesy, and is almost an offensive mockery of the tragedy which happened a century earlier. On top of this, the love-story was over the top, and fake.
Honorable Mention: Dazed and Confused(1994): The movie has no plot at all. Just admit it: You like the movie for its soundtrack, and nothing else.
Most Underrated Non-B-Movie of All Time
Criteria: As the title implies, the movie has to be an Arthouse movie(not a B-Film). It also has to be widely considered low tier by Film Critics, movie fans, and the Film Industry.
Movie Choice: Super Mario Bros.(1993)
The movie was widely considered a big joke to be honest. The acting was considered sub-par, Dennis Hopper was the only well-known actor, and the worst part of it all, the movie was extremely unrealistic to Super Mario video game series.
However, I beg to differ. Despite the fact it truly didn't have much in common with the video game series, the movie was a great adventure movie with a unique plot, and it kept us asking higher order questions regarding the universe. I found the acting good, and it was an exciting movie with a killer soundtrack.
Honorable Mention: Jack and Jill(2011): I don't care how stupid the movie is, this is one of the funniest Adam Sandler movies of all time.
Part 2 is coming soon. What are some other "awards" you can think of that are obscure? Let me know.
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