I Need opinions on a situation I just encountered. Should adult men be able to visit a ballet show that includes children's ballet?

[msmissydc]

A better known ballet show is coming to my town and I want to go. I did ballet myself as a child and this show is not unknown, and I really would like to see the different grades of vocations. I don't have many people who would be interested in joining, except maybe one who declined for a different reason.
His opinion was, that it will be seen as weird by other men, when an adult man visits a children's ballet.

The children ballet is neither the only nor the main part. Also, as far as I know, its mixed genders.
His argument made no sense for me and I can't be the only one right?

First, if he doesn't want to go he should just tell and be honest.
Second, if he is at least a bit honest then it's either his own view to sexualize ballet and even children's ballet…
Or third, he is under the impression that a majority of men think so.

I am creeped out by option two and three. Is that really the case with a lot of men or people in general?
I can understand not wanting to be seen as a creep, that part is not what I would argue about. BUT it's not helping when you support The view that some things need to be seen as sexual.
It's not helping to identify real creeps when you label normal things as creepy!!
I do not use paedophilia here specifically because he mentioned he doesn't want to go because of the children's part, but that argument is build on the basis that the show itself is sexual in his or peoples view. So yeah more than that.

Things can also be just for art or fun!!!

PS, Sorry for the rant inside this question. Ignore it if you don't like it, but I would still like some input.

[Orion84]

As much as I hate to say it, it sounds more like option 2, to me, and that's just... yuck.

Granted, there are situations in which people unfairly assume that men shouldn't be around children, but in this instance, it seems like he's the one projecting the sexualization of children.

I don't think most guys would want to go, simply because we'd view ballet as boring, and we'd say so. He seems to think there's a sexual connotation to it, and that's concerning.

[msmissydc]

This was for the most part my thought as well. Thank you I was really scared for a while thinking my view was rarer than I thought.

[Lliam]

That's really bizarre. He's admitting that he sexualizes the dancers, even the children.
I wonder if he looks at all forms of dance that way.
Creepy.

Ballet is a beautiful, graceful art form and it's very difficult. It requires hard work and discipline. You have to admire young people who attempt it. The last thing on their minds is sexuality.

It's sad the way children have been sexualized in modern culture.

[msmissydc]

Yes! So I am by far not the only one thinking his answer is nonsense and creepy. I was scared for a while.

[beefcakebradybatson]

WHY CERTAINLY !!!

[Lliam]

Thank you for the MHO, msmissydc.

[genericname85]

so i think there is one of 2 things going on. either he's having some internalized misandry from fake medial narratives that over expose pedophiles to make people think pedophilia is normal, which it sure isn't. or he's just a pedophile himself and is projecting his pedophilia on all men.

so from my point of view, there's no problem if a man visits childrens ballet. cause the majority of them aren't pedos. and even if they were so what? them looking at the girls and getting aroused won't harm these girls right? i understand that this thought may cause you discomfort but realisticly nothing happens to the girls right? it's still a safe and protected enviornment cause the parents are there and law enforcement is probably also there since the organization team actually has to ensure safety.

Like i think of it like me watching womens beach volleyball. i enjoy watching volleyball as i play that sport. i watch mens and womens volleyball but in womens volleyball, the nice extra is the juicy asses. and even if i was just there to see the juicy asses. so what? i find it totally acceptable to enjoy that as long as no assault or harrasment takes place.

[genericname85]

and just as a side note: some women are pedophiles too. so should nobody watch childrens ballet then?

[ohsheeT]

Omg. Well you can see he has never had kids or wants them.

He's making it all about him. And how others will look at him

No one's brains are even going to go there. This is about kids that have worked really hard to put this show on and giving then the support to help them grow and feel good about themselves and to keep doing positive things in life


No is even going to know he's there. Wtf it's not about him

[msmissydc]

Yes, I agree with that as well. Another part that makes his answer total nonsense.

[ohsheeT]

Yes, for sure. It sounds like it is just not for him

[WindAtMyBack]

You gotta admit that it's not quite the same thing as football and beer.

Ballet is not popular, simple as that. It's something that might appeal to a very limited number of people, whether they are men or women.

I can appreciate the talent and hard work they put in. But it has no appeal to me whatsoever. That's even more true of children doing it. The only reason for most people to watch children do stuff like ballet, plays or school bands is to support them, not because you really want to watch them.

And yes, it would be seen as weird by other men, unless it's his own child, or the child of an SO. Even in that case it would be something like, "Ah man, I feel ya, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do."

[AviatorTom]

There should be nothing wrong with a man watching a children's ballerina show, especially if some of the children will be boys. The best ballet troupes have both male and female dancers. Consider Rudolf Nureyev, perhaps the most renowned male ballet dancer of all time.

Having said that, I'm sure there are some who will think it's creepy for an adult man to watch girls in skimpy ballerina costumes.

[Levin]

You're forgetting option 4, that women will think him a paedo.

Women label men all kinds of things at the drop of a hat. The topic of Taylor Swift came up for whatever reason with a work colleague, and then she inferred that I fancied her and thusly that would make me a paedo. Well obviously I'm not interested in her but she's thirty fucking five. This is what women are like. Every deed and action from a man has ill will.

As for a child's ballet or whatever. Well, obviously, the most likely reason would be that he'd be watching his daughter.

[Tarifa]

It should be normal to attend. My daughter did ballet for years and years. Fathers and mothers alike would attend classes and/or representations on stage.

It would be a sad world if men wouldn't be able to attend a ballet class for fear of one or two exceptions to the normal view that kids are just kids. But granted, those few spoil it for the rest of us. The same could be said for picking up sons and daughters at school. Who knows if there isn't a pervert among them?

[OneViewpoint]

LOL, I'd be looking for a way out just because I find ballet like watching paint dry. If I were a parent of a kid taking ballet lessons or the friend of someone doing it, I'd have 3 cups of coffee and try to stay awake. But it's not my first choice.

Sounds like your friend has some deep seated insecurities as a man and maybe some creepy thoughts if he see's ballet as sexual and/or effeminate. It's just slow boring dancing. On your toes. Ouch!

[DJB72]

I was a ballet dancer for 16 years. If he's sexualising children it's got nothing to do with ballet and everything to do with him.

Maybe educate him on the history of ballet - that in the French courts where it began, women weren't permitted to take part because it was so physically demanding. Or that the vast majority of male dancers are heterosexuals.

Of course if he's such an asshole he's sexualising kids you may need to point out what their dads will do to him...

[Curmudgeon]

And the demonization of fathers is just sad. Countless daddies are there for their daughters. And grandfathers and brothers for that matter.

[slatyb]

It would be strange for a man unconnected to the performers to attend an amateur ballet performance. If I were in charge, I wouldn't admit him. I would give some number of tickets to the dancers or their parents to distribute to their invited guests.

[Anonymous]

Men have been sexualising children for decades. No surprise there.

[Kelly6]

@msmissydc I think everyone should be allowed to visit it, adult men or women or children.

[FunkyMonkee]

I don't see anything wrong with it and, besides, most likely, there'll be other men there!

[msmissydc]

I am sure there will be men. Which for me is just normal.

[FunkyMonkee]

Absolutely.

[Bricealan]

His feelings and attitude seem immature for an adult

[Jerre]

If it was a date, I think most men would attend. I do agree mo st men would not attend

by themselves.

[msmissydc]

Its not a date. I would have no problems if he said he doesn't like it. But that's not what he did. His answer just seemed weird.

[exitseven]

Just go and enjoy yourself. You do not need to explain yourself to people.

[AngryCarl2]

Is it because there are kids or because he hates ballet? Because if he hates ballet that's perfectly normal.

[DrPepper12]

Valid question. He just doesn't wanna go even though it would be FINE for him to attend.

[nawtee_me]

I used to go watch my daughter when she was in ballet.

[msc545]

Yes, why not? Not all adult men are child molesters, and plenty of adult women ARE.

[RedInnocent69]

Of course. That’s ridiculous

[Jennz6]

How can a ballet be sexual?

[msmissydc]

Good question. I dont know.

[Jennz6]

@msmissydc
This is too creepy

[Dargil]

I don't see why not.

[MasterKS]

How old the children makes the difference, any who reach teen can be triggering for some men, to be honest!

[msmissydc]

No it shouldn't. Because at that point you have to say ballet is sexual when adults do it, while children do the same thing.
There is a difference between seeing a person you find attractive and sexualizing an art form! And if he was scared he will find children attractive that's an even bigger problem WTF!! EW!

[qwerty2469]

If their kids ar performing

[jazzy34]

Yes, it's fine.