A Take on What Grief is Really Like for Those Who Have Yet to Experience It

[sjoes006]

Most of us have been there, a friend loses a parent of a child much too young. You want to help but it just makes you uncomfortable. You don't know what it feels like but you're pretty sure there's nothing you can say that will make it better or even seem appropriate.

As someone that lost a parent very young and then went to many more funerals, where I was not the direct bereaved, most of the time the best thing to do is say nothing and be there. Sorry for your loss gets old pretty quick and you feel like it's your job to make them feel better and put on a public face.

The best thing to do is to say we're here for you for anything you need and will be checking in. X meant a lot to all of us.

But for those of you who haven't yet lost a et lost a loved one and have a friend that has be aware that the pain never goes away or becomes less. You just don't think of it everyday. You think of it less and less but there are moments where you relive that feelin of loss.

This moment of truth inspired by a quote from a Grey's Anatomy line last night: "You and I both know how this comes and goes, Pearce will be going through this for the rest of her life".

The line delivered by a person to a person who's lost people. I found it so true in one way but distant in another.

This is why we love Rashida Jones. This logic is so spot on. It's been a week, it's been two weeks. She doesn't need you time to live your own life. As anyone who has lost someone you know it never hurts less ever. But you pick yourself up at some point and decide to keep living.

My advice to those of you who are younger and helping a friend through something like this is do give them space and family time at first. But do be there to take them out and do fun things after a couple of weeks. If they want to talk listen Be supportive.

Uears later if they bring it up listen. It isn't a thing they talk about with just anyone.

I think the best thing to do to prepare yourself for these types of conversations is realize this isn't something that just happened to your friend and is unique to them.

It is something each and every very one of us will go through several times over in our lives. People don't like sympathy but they do appreciate empathetic understanding that isn't making it about you.

If you're a friend they see everyday the funeral is a time to stand on the side lines and wait for cues. You'll have plenty of time after the dust has settled to check in on your friend.

In the long term in a way grief is love and comforting and not forgetting or giving up on who that person was. It's keeping them alive through memory and stories.

But then you have triggers where you are now burying someone else's Dad and it makes you think of yours and you have to bite your lower lip so as not to cry because it would be inappropriate.

[coolbreeze]

Nice mytake. When loosing somebody everybody needs a shoulder to cry on and someone to talk to and listen to them.

[mavişcikk]

Beautiful.