Internet Friends...Are the Connections Real?

[yzfjamie]

So, we're in an era where the internet is a necessity to most people. I remember growing up, back in the days of dial up modems. The times where your internet would shut off if someone rang the house phone - another thing that has slowly disappeared over time.

I'm curious to get people's opinions on this subject. Both male and female.

With the likes of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat etc... Social media has taken over people's lives. I know there will be a few people here who will quickly jump down my throat. "I don't use social media!". Cool, what are you doing here then? With all these websites and apps, meeting people has never been easier - or should I say speaking to people has never been easier.

There's never any certainty that we will ever meet these people that we are so quick to call "Friends". It's like a whole other universe. You can create yourself to be whatever you want. You can either straight up lie about who you are, or you can use filters, effects and editing to manipulate your photos. It's a pretty scary place.

I'll admit, I myself have spoken to people online. I have a daily correspondence with a girl from California, USA. We've kept it daily and strictly to email only. No phone numbers, no addresses. We've exchanged enough information to prove to each other that we are who we say we are, but that's as far as it goes on that level. It's one personality, to another without physical attraction. She's a sweet girl. She's very smart, she's funny, she definitely gets my heart pounding and she makes me smile.

You know that feeling, that sudden sense of excitement that you get when something great happens? It's what happens to me when I get my daily message. I'm constantly questioning myself. "What would happen if I was closer? Would this still be happening, or are we both this immersed just out of curiosity of one another?". I've never met her, nor have I ever seen her in person, but I find myself thinking about her more and more. What if, and this is a huge "what if", but what if we did meet? If she makes me this nervous from 5000 miles away, how would I feel 5 feet away?

Now, putting all that aside, I wanna hear your stories. Have you ever spoken to someone online that you've made a connection with? How did it end up?

#friends #relationships

[Angelina25]

Ok, so I had a different account on GaG a year back and when I was deactivating it, j asked this girl if she'd like to stay in touch. Within minutes she replied and then we exchanged WhatsApp numbers. She was from South Africa.
I was so excited about finally having a friend from a different country. She seemed to be so cute, and sweet, just the right amount of maturity for a 19 year old. I am 17. And so, I guess it connected quite well.
It was all good and it felt like we're gonna stay friends till what? Eternity? We had to have conversations every day. She was pretty much like me, no boyfriend, no real friends, all fake ones... Everything seemed so real. We even called up each other and once in a while video called each other.
And then, I had my national exams of Grade 12. So, I told her that I'd keep my phone switched off for a long time now. And I had given her another number just in case she wanted to contact me.
Boom! 3 and a half months later, when I finally get my phone and I'm so excited to hear from her, I get nothing. Throughout my exams, I was so excited to share what all happened with me and to know what happened to her...
But when I switch on the application all I see is the messages that I sent her 3 and a half months back were delivered. Never read. I send her a text message saying we could finally talk and how excited I was... All messages delivered, she didn't read it. Her last seen kept changing be she never read anyone of the messages. I decided to call her up. I called up twice. The second time a man picks up. "Hello" ?
I was certainly not expecting a male voice. I didn't reply the first time and when I did, all I heard was a beep in response. And then, she blocks me. She simply blocked me.

[Angelina25]

Yeah, that is what we call "ghosting".
I have another friend from Sweden, my age. 17. She is pretty nice. I hope things go well for us.
A. x

[yzfjamie]

Damn! I'm so sorry! I do hope things work out better for you with the other friend that you have though. I hate people who can't even have the decency to say goodbye.

[Angelina25]

Yeah exactly. It was so hurtful. All I ever thought was about telling her how I felt during exams and everything. All she did was block.*sigh*
There's nothing we can do now.

[Jammie2]

I'm so sorry! That is a horrible feeling to get rejected like that. Its so personal and hurtful.

[Angelina25]

@Jammie2
Ikr. I found her back here. I can confront and all but what's the point? It's just that simple. She never had real feelings for me.

[Nexovous]

I would say most definitely. You're able to hide behind a platform and both escape social norms for the time period so you can talk about so much more and be goofy or weird all you want without fear of judging. I had a COD friend that I swear j had a better friendship with then any guy I ever called my best friend. Iet him in real life one day and he was nothing like what I expected to see and it didn't matter because we already had a friendship and once we started talking and joking around again we were inseparable. I moved due to work and it's quit unfortunate because he was one of the coolest guys and i'm proud to be able to call him my friend.

[dtweed96]

Well I've met this Italian girl online most details about her were true she is 45, a sculpting artist who travels the world maybe that's why I can't find any details on her. She wanted to meet me some day before then she just emails me and tries to video chat, I had my suspicions of her being fake but since over the past weeks. It has really been her giving details and has only been asking me simple questions that were sincere. Like what area I live in never asked the address, what do I like to do, what kind of person am I. After that she got real with me after saying she was in the Netherlands she just kept talking about how she lost her parents by the age of 19. Hasn't had a real relationship in like 2 years since everytime she tried to get a relationship or friendship, it ended as soon as people found out she is wealthy. She told me that after telling me about the real her and I felt pretty impressed, but I didn't care and she kept thinking about us meeting and traveling together. She also thought about us getting married but she is patient and said she'd rather continue trying to connect before getting that real. There is some type of love between us since we don't really like to lie to each other. As we talk about everyday we talk about her situation in leaving the Netherlands and anything else accept starting a family that is really her dreams. She will probably start talking about that when our relationship gets real. So far we just have love and trust and it goes to show you only certain people lie online not everyone does that.

[zaza111]

I've met someone on a forum, we started to chat, had great conversations, fun, smart, everything you want, we lived quite close to each other 2 hours drive, so we decided to meet, we did, we clicked, had a crazy 6 months that changed my life forever, put me trough hell. I found out later he had borderline personality disorder.
Meeting someone online is dangerous, because no matter what they say about themselves, no matter how real it seems everything, the truth is we don't know each other, we are more imagining, projecting things.
Sure we all need to connect, to talk, to dream, often it is easier to do it online, so I think cyber friendships have a role in our life but we also need to be cautious!

[Curly_haired_girl]

Yes they can be very real. I have many online friends. Even though they aren't all close to me (like, just small short talks), I have a few that are really close and I've known them for years now, they've always been so supportive and just amazing people.
So yes, they can be real.

Best thing about it being one is, if you fight or you guys don't want to be friends for whatever reason, or you dislike them to start with, it's online, different country, so no having to meet up and see them in real life xD

[dragonfly6516]

I feel the same way that you do, being 10 years older, and growing up in the 90's slightly before internet shifted from luxury to utility.

I tend to to assume that online romances aren't even "real" unless certain other criteria have been met. But I personally have made a few really good true actual friendships, with people that I met on the internet.

Now, these are platonic friendships, not romances, and they are real, but I still personally don't believe that true love can form without ever meeting in person, nor do I believe romantic relationships can last like that.

[CubsterShura]

All my relationships started online. Normally I have strict parents, have restrictions in going out and I don't like my peers. Besides, I interacted with guys so less I was absolutely naive in my previous relationships.

Normally when it comes to friends, I don't get very attached with just friends. But I do have one girl friend who is of my age and we are like best friends. We both have elder brothers and already promised one another that we will invite one another for attending our brothers' weddings, lol. So yeah, you don't really connect with most, but with a few people you really click, it can be either platonic or romantic way.

I did a lot of stupid stuff since I started using the internet. I was 13. I used to regret it, until I realized that I shouldn't because worst mistakes make the best lessons. I am a lot less naive now. :)

[meowcow]

Generally, online friends are not friends. There is no real bond, and they will not get out of their chair to help you when shit hits the fan. This is a MAJOR problem for millennials because when life gets tough, they have no real friends to help them, and they resort to online friends to float fake sentiment in their direction.

This is why so many young people do not cope well with life stresses. In the past, we would talk in person with our friends, give each other hugs, give presents to cheer each other up. That is missing from most relationships in young people. So when they are depressed, they are sitting alone on their smartphone looking for attention from online people who don't give a shit about them.

[Wwwyzzerdd]

Nooooo. Nooo. Nooo. Nooooooooo. No.

It's the internet. These people won't take care of your dog when you have to go away for the weekend. They won't pick you up after bailing you out of jail. They won't be there during any major life event like showing up at the hospital when your kid is being born. You won't share a beer and reminisce about past experiences. These people are, the majority of them, the same as strangers on the street if not more so. Never having met this person IRL you cannot for sure say what their true intentions are. They might be a friend or they might be an axe murderer, flip a coin.

[Astria]

I've had friends online that were without food and bought them food.

[Papavera]

They won't because they can't. Maybe if they could, they would. Sometimes advice is all someone needs... There are different kinds of friendships.

[Wwwyzzerdd]

@Papavera I don't consider then real friends if I never see them.

[jjjoanaaa]

I met my first boyfriend on GTA V, I know how silly that sounds, but we made a real connection, he made me feel things I haven't felt before, so we decided we should meet. I am from Portugal and he was too but was currently leaving in France. We were both virgins and we lost it to each other. It was very special, and although we are not together anymore I don't regret that it happened.
I also met my best friend trought a game, we're best friends for a year now and I love her so much ♥

[Wafflesareamazballs]

It’s real for some people. I feel as long as you don’t lie about who you are on the internet the connect is real. For me personally I feel like internet friends only go so far. I would love to meet them in person and actually get to know these internet friends of mine! (:

[Jmcmanning]

Yes, it can be very real. I have become friends people initially online and talked to them for a certain amount of time frame. We've exchanged numbers, met, stay in touch in other forms as well. I don't do this with everyone I talk to online, only those I click with on a friendship level.

[bubble_tea]

I feel like I share a special bond with the online friends I've known for over 10 years. They offer me something nobody in my city could or can. Even if we don't talk as often as we used to, I still have fond memories I've created with them back in the days.

[Anonymous]

I've met what I consider my best friend on Internet. He's from the other side of the world (literally). It's been some crazy 6 years; we've really talked about lots of things, gone through lots of doubts, creepy moments, etc. But he's been there for me in both good and bad times as I'll listen him on same conditions. He's the only person I can think "I'm not alone" when I feel like shit.

IRL, most people are more worried about what my surname is, how much I make, etc. They'll either praise or laugh at me; I've no right to be myself but only what I do. Not at all like the fulfilling yet simplistic friendship I met online.

[pooper89]

I think the connection is real, for sure. I only speak for myself, but none of my online connections lasted -meaning I no longer talk to any of them. One guy I had a crush on on here a while back. I asked if he would Skype with me and he kept on coming up with excuses until he eventually ghosted me.

[fashionguy17]

It’s funny. I remember when I was a kid (I was born in the 90s), if you met someone online, they were instantly thought of as a molester or killer 😂. How times have changed.

I actually met quite a bit of people from the internet in real life, and we became good friends.

[damnwinter]

Just today I was talking to an online friend about how we've been friends for 9 years :) he's been very helpful in some of my difficult times, as I have been during his. It's not easy, but it's possible!

[Hungry_Shark]

I dont think internet connections can be real.
I mean unless you dont feel someone face to face , their energies, their aura, how they talk, their body language,
You really cannot be attracted to someone without seeing them face to face, no matter how good they look in pics.

[Anonymous]

I agree but it depends on the person. Some people do care and some people don't. I helped a girl recently get back in touch with her sister who she hadn't talked to in 5 years. I changed her life and we're online friends. It happens. Yeah some people won't care but others will.

[Guy2809]

I believe to some degree, internet relationships are legitimate, in the way that you might have a friendship or be romantically involved with the character you know through the internet. The problem is that not everyone show their true face thruogh internet, so the relationship ceases to exist when finding each other in the real world.

[Guanfei]

Most of the time, no, they're not real. The distance gives people the feeling it's unreal and they easily back off and leave you unscrupulously.
But I've met people who were genuinely my friends. I still have one, who lives in Texas. We got separated for 2 years because she had an possessive boyfriend. When she finally got rid of him, first thing she did was to look for me.

[HOAAH]

I think meeting up face to face is more important than just internet friends.

I did remeet my husband on facebook but it wasn't enough for us to just write to each other, we took it to the next level... we called each other and visited each other.