Why do people have kids if it makes their life miserable?

[Anonymous]

A lot of people still have kids even tho they know they're life will be horrible and missesrble and never the same after that. I personally NEVER want kids, not even if you gave me a billion dollars. (For lots of reasons and because I don't like them) but some of the reasons having kids ruin your life is because
1. No freedom
2. Your work/career time will have to be cut especially if your a women when you first have the kid. So your "dreams" will be ruined
3. No sleep
4. You're not happy anymore
5. You can't do anything you want or go out whenever you want without worrying about the kids
6. Your life will never be the same

I could list a whole bunch of reasons but I'll stop there. Now after knowing all these reasons why would people still want kids.

[CountessSarah]

Absolutely agree.

What gets me are the people who have kids, indirectly admit to hating it, but act like them having kids was some sort of essential part of growing up, and that you should feel bad for not having done the same.
Have kids if and when you want to, don't act like you're fulfilling some sort of mandatory life goal shared by all people, or that you're doing your part for the species - there are more than enough dribbling little shitheads running around right now for a sizable portion of the population to not bother reproducing without resulting in mankinds extinction.

People who insist other people have kids, are like people who hate their jobs and tell people who enjoy their work that they should get a 'real job'.
Hey, just because you hate your life doesn't mean I should, too.

[Asker]

YASSS EXACTLY!!! 💯💯💯
Say it again for the people in the back haha

[Warmapplecrumble]

I agree

[Kitten967]

1. You still have freedom, you can do the same stuff if your partner is okay looking after the little one for a bit.
2. Not always, your partner can choose to stay at home with the child or you can choose to work straight after your child is born and you can still chase your dreams. You don't have to stop working on your career.
3. Depends on the child, some children sleep through from the moment they are born.
4. Children can bring happiness. You can still be just as happy, sometimes more happy, with a child.
5. You can still do whatever you want or go out whenever, you'll just worry a bit more.
6. It will only change in the sense you'll have an extra person to look after. Everything else is still pretty much the same.

[menina]

I don't think that having kids makes your life miserable. Sure, you'll have to worry about other human being who depends on you, but it's not like your life is over.
I understand you don't want to be a mother, and also you're not forced to have children.
But don't judge people who choose to have them.

[Browneye57]

When they grow up and move out and marry and have their own kids and come to visit you and love you and go on vacation with you...
You'll forget all about the difficulties you had raising them and feel truly blessed to have your children around.
And then they go home. :)

I have 3 - 2 from the first marriage and 1 from the second. Wouldn't trade for any of them. I feel truly blessed and love them dearly.

So now I gotta ask... kids are not much different than dogs. Well maybe a little, but still, the similarity is remarkable. And childless couples have no issues have a dog or two, or three, around. And they NEVER grow up and move out! :)

[Asker]

Tbh I wouldn't want a dog either haha but they're cute to look at and play with

[Browneye57]

You missed the content entirely. Oh well. LOL.

If you never have kids then you never have a family unless you have a lot of siblings or other family you stay in contact with. With kids they're YOUR own family. It's hard to explain. It will likely make more sense to you in ten to fifteen years. When I was your age I said the EXACT same thing. I watched my sister's kids growing and something clicked.

Raising children isn't about what you get or don't get out of it. It's about giving. When you're so well accomplished and comfortable with yourself THEN you get to a place where you have all this extra life-force to give to others. And that's what a spouse and kids, and having a family is about.

[harryish]

Its automatically triggered inside humans by nature. The nature wants every species to reproduce and survive. Thats why it created such phenomena by which two genders get attracted towards each other, have sex and make babies. But it was a thing of past. Now crazy humans have started creating condoms and other protective measure which can give you all the pleasure but can save you from having kids. Human has ruined the basic rule of nature. If there were no protection created, people would have no other option than have kids and you wouldn't ask this question today.

[BLOODYBEAST]

Whatever rocks your boat tbh. You know some people actually want their lineage to continue and not to die with them especially if you are not successful enough and you have not etched your family's name on the map. Seems to me you're just doing it for selfish reasons, thinking about yourself alone! Most women are like this and even most men. If I'm dating a girl that I really love and care about and she even mentions not having kids, especially because of the fact that "they're annoying" or "you have no free time for yourself," I'm picking my bag and I'm getting the fuck up outta there. If you want to literally end your family then fine. But sorry I gotta continue my family line, we have not achieved enough in life.

[BrittBratt2416]

Yes I agree, it boggles my mind that people want to whip out their own bloodline/generation. You really don't want a little piece of you left on earth even long after your gone? At least that person says at one point you existed.

[simple-question]

Just don’t do it if it is so bad it is not a requirement. If you don’t want them it is better not to do it than raise more dysfunctional kids. Since the sight of all these miserable with kids justifies your position then just soak it up. Why ask why though?

[Asker]

Jw that's all

[WeirdoWerdo]

"You're not happy anymore"
You make me sad... What if your parents didn't have you? You did the same things to your parents.. I'd have a better night now if you weren't born. They wouldn't have gotten you if didn't want you, they wouldn't have kept you if they loved you! If I were you I'd thank my parents for having me.

[Asker]

They've said that before lol

[Atreyu]

because the vast majority of people believe children is the most rewarding experience of their lives.

I understand that you may not want kids and that's perfectly fine, but wtf? lmao you can't be so self obsessed that you think NO ONE wants kids are you?

this is like the atheism argument all over again.

yes the vast majority of the people in the world are well aware of the drawbacks. and yes we have weighed it carefully.
and yes we still love our children and want to continue having them

[Asker]

Where did I say "no one wants kids" I said people shouldn't have kids because of... etc"

[Atreyu]

first line. people will want kids knowing their life will be horrible and miserable.
this simply isn't the case.

[BrittBratt2416]

That's irresponsible people who clearly weren't ready to have children. They knew they wanted to go out and still party, sleep whenever, and go when ever, but instead they laid up with some guy/girl they never intended to be serious with and made a baby (s). But for the ones who always loved kids and wanted to have them, are extremely happy with their decision. Yes sometimes it can be stressful but for the most part they are happy to have a family and grow one.

[BrittBratt2416]

And I noticed a lot of women our age always say they don't want kids but then as soon as they hit the big three-0, thats when the clock starts ticking. Never say never cause you don't want to be one of those women who wake up one day regretting, is it find right now that you don't want kids? Yes but at least give yourself 2 or 3 more years before making it it a final decision.

[pretty-kitty]

Well first thing you gotta do is realise that not everybody is like you, which by the sounds of it.. that's a good thing. You don't want to have kids? That's fine, don't do it! Most people feel differently, there are many benifits to having children and to most people the benifits outweigh the negatives. You sound line you need to grow up and realise that your opinion isn't the be all and end all.

[KadBitty]

Probably because everybody is different and many people don't feel how you do maybe? If they did, none of us would exist probably.

[macix670]

Because it's satisfying raising another human being and loving a child that is your own flesh and blood. I would give up everything for a child's love. I plan on having a big family, maybe 5 kids and I don't give a damn about other people's opinions on it.

[steveguitar]

The reason it gets ruined is because of society. Society has made it very difficult to have kids. It's not that kids are terrible, sure there's a responsibility, but they aren't all that bad. It's really te expense, which comes from society

[BrittBratt2416]

exactly. Having to work long hours, having to make enough money, having to juggle bills and kids is whats making people stressed out and not want to make or have families. If companies didn't burn people out so much, they might people able to have a healthy balance between work life and family.

[steveguitar]

@BrittBratt2416 thanks, that's exactly the thought

[LolaB13]

I'm a mother and I love my kid more than anything, in fact having him saved my life! There was one point in my life before I had him I would always say I don't want kids because I still wanted to party so I get where you're coming from.

[Shimy]

I don't want kids for the exact same reasons, and some others

[LoloWaye]

They probably didn't think their lives would be miserable. Or they got pregnant on accident and didn't want abortion, or even adoption.

[tyber1]

The honest answer is that they're idiots and they lack foresight.

[Anonymous]

Don't judge people for picking a different life than you.

[Asker]

I'm not!

[Chanel1981]

I guess everyone views it differently... there's no right or wrong answer

[Anotherweirdo]

I don't get when they have kids on purpose and no money as well. For the other things... well I already wants kids... it will be beautiful :)

[blackwolf3x]

it used to be should I sleep with her should I use BC I should care

[LittleSally]

Love and someone to continue their line.

[Blitzkrieger]

Because they love their children.

[TheFlak38]

Yeah just get laid then and let your ovaries dry out. I bet that will fulfil you and give you all the happiness you want.

[Asker]

Awwww you're so sweet, but thanks I already have all the happiness I want

[TheFlak38]

This is the female gager that afterwards posts a question titled like this "OMG IM SO DEPRESSED EVERYONE AROUND ME IS HAVING LITTLE VERSIONS OF THEMSELVES EXCEPT ME! PLEASE HELP! WHAT DO I DO?"

[Asker]

You're the Type of guy to be like "OMG I NEED TO CATEGORIZE ALL GIRLS IN THE SAME BOX BECAUSE THEYRE ALL THE SAME IN MY HEAD AND I ENJOYING DOING THAT" yeah no, that will NEVER happen bruh. The only post you'll see me posting in hopefully a couple of years is "in making a lot of money from my business what should I do with it, should I buy item a or item b of both" ;)
And if you have a prob with that oh well not my prob I'll enjoy my happy successful life

[TheFlak38]

I categorised you. Not someone else Mrs. Cute Man.

[Asker]

Go on and keep categorizing why would I care, meanwhile you prob have kids and have a horrible life and that's why your commenting on my post being annoying but funny but if you want to improve your ur life let me know and I'll give you free advice ;)

[TheFlak38]

Meanwhile you're just an attention whore trolling anonymously.
I don't take advice from cute men like you.

[Asker]

Aw no that's you tho you're the attention troll whore because you literally keep commenting on my stuff and you know I'm right but you feel so bad about your life that you gotta keep commenting to make yourself believe your life's okay but hey to each their own lmao

[TheFlak38]

Someone needs a dick very badly.

[Asker]

But i don't tho but maybe you do