Should I confront my boyfriend's sister?

Question

So my boyfriends sister is rude to me. I been holding this in and haven’t said anything to his sister about this for 4 months. I gave her a birthday present and said happy birthday to her and she couldn’t say thank you to any of those things. I only got her a gift because it was her sweet sixteen. I commented on her picture and called her pretty and she couldn’t even say thank you. Ever since my boyfriend asked her questions about me she stopped liking my Instagram posts. She use to like them and now she doesn’t. I don’t want my hatred towards her to ruin our relationship. I don’t want the rest of his family to hate me if i talk to his sister about these problems. What should I do? Should I talk to her? She has a cheer competition tomorrow. I was either going to talk to her today or the day after her competition to cause her not to have stress at competition. When should I talk to her?

BlackRoseFairy · Accepted Answer

She's a teenager so it is normal for her to react like this.
Trying to see it from her point of view, there are a couple of other possibilities that could explain her behaviour.
1. She's jealous
2. She's close with her brother/ they used to do stuff together and now you are taking him away and he is spending less time with her
3. She's in an awkward position because her brother brought you home - there might even be some comments about you that you don't know about which are exaggerating her.
4. She's having other troubles and is taking out on you.

For me the best thing you can do is talk to your boyfriend. Not in a belittling manner, casually. Don't try to get between them or you might end up losing your boyfriend.
He can talk to her and sort it out or you two can find ways to avoid you meeting his sister a lot.
In any case you should keep a friendly and civilised manner, especially when you have to talk to her, even if she doesn't return it.

Randomawkwardness · Accepted Answer

She has a cheer competition. Let that sink in. Being a cheerleader myself, it was always super stressful before even just games and our squad never went to nationals or state. I can't imagine the stress she is feeling right now. I wouldn't do anything until after the competition other than maybe show up for her and have flowers and whatnot for if she wins or places. Being a teenager, having someone who wants to be there and talk to you is really annoying. Yes, you may mean well and you may be an amazing person; however, there's a lot of stress and other things going on as a teen. I wouldn't take it personally, I remember for a straight week I didn't talk to anyone and I ghosted half of my friends, it's really just part of being a teenager.

Lynx122 · Accepted Answer

You shouldn't hate her in the first place. Yes she didn't treat you great but you shouldn't let other people drive you that far especially since she's still a kid. You should ask yourself why you hate her are your expectations too high?

Or is it some pain or fear that she stepped on that you weren't conscious of? It's not worth getting that woked up over, you can talk to her but not with this mindset do it when you're more relaxed and accepting.

She's probably just not used to not having her brother to herself.

deryn · Accepted Answer

Yes. Talk to her about it because if you don't your boyfriend will keep having his sister and possibly other family members whisperkng in his ear day after day and that shit will ware him down to the point where he will have to choose you or his family and 80% of the time its the family that wins.

talloak · Answer

If she were an adult then it would make sense to confront her about acting like a child. Since she is a child, you really shouldn't be taking any of this as seriously as you do. Not thanking you for presents and well-wishes and not liking your Instagram posts are childish but hardly significant affronts. Why do they bother you as much as they do? If you confront her on these, you will be stooping down to her age level.

bubbles328 · Answer

Have you spoke to your boyfriend about this first? if not try speaking to him. If you have and need to go to her I would wait until a quiet time where I could sit down and talk to her in private. Chances are she will just shrug it off and make out that it is in your head so be wary of that make sure you use facts rather than speculation and make sure you have things to back these facts up.

josephforsse1 · Answer

That's a tough one. My exes sister was a rude bully to me and her also smoked weed near our newborn. i stood up for us and next thing I know, I am not welcome into the house? Wtf? I stood up for my ex and newborn , I wanted to not have weed smoke near and to hear vulgarities. I said something and they all turned on me. All except our child,3 now, and they are already trying to brainwash her against me because I will NEVER give up o. My daughter.

Screenwriter · Answer

She's a teen-ager. She's not your friend. Leave her alone. You are in her brother's life, not hers. Since she was rude and dropped off your instagram, let it go. She's not interested in you, and that seems normal since she's in high school. People do a lot of dumb, rude things in high school.

Anonymous · Answer

Teenage harmones make them hate their own family. You are not family yet. So let it go. Just tolerate it. If she comes around, fine. Otherwise try to be civil. For your boyfriend.

If it is that important for you that HIS family loves him, maybe break up and find a guy with mostly no family. Because unfortunately family drama is inevitable. You only have to decide if the guy is worth tzolerating these dramas for.

lookin64 · Answer

in my opinion talk to your boyfriend and make him apprised of the situation. After he is aware of it let him handle it in his own way since its his sister. If you try all you will do is drive a wedge between you and him.

Primrose21 · Answer

Is she close with your boyfriend? Probably is she is getting jealous coz his brother is spending less time and attention to her. This typically happens among close siblings.

BoxySama · Answer

Talk it out with her, sisters many time don't like brother's girlfriend because they see it as personal theft

GennySanders · Answer

I wouldn't waste my time with her, obviously the problem is her here if your boyfriend can't see that then he's just like her I don't know about the rest of the family.

EnglundUberAlles · Answer

Leave it be. You're not dating her, you're dating her brother.

rockrewls · Answer

Maybe try to talk to her in private, and find out whats wrong?

Nikola99 · Answer

If all three of you are from Alabama just have a threesome

SongBird3 · Answer

she's a sixteen year old girl. Dont worry about it

byowell · Answer

So did you confront her? Lol, if so how did it go?

Anonymous · Answer

If you deal with confrontation well.. otherwise, don't

bklynbadboy1 · Answer

No dont do it she's just a kid

DylanXBailly · Answer

These things really seem like non-issues

Athena098 · Answer

She just kid she a child.

Joker_ · Answer

Sure if you want to

Anonymous · Answer

Beat her ass!!!

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