If your parent treats your spouse horrible, is that really a loving parent?

[Danielle93]

Supposely a parent loves you, looks out for your best interest, wants the best for you and wants you to be happy right?

Well whenever I hear horror stories of parents constantly voicing their disapproval of their child's relationship, badmouthing about their partners to their child and others, threatening to kick their child out of the house or disowning them, trying to set them up for a date with someone else and going out of their ways to make their dislike super obvious... that makes me think that's the total opposite of love.

Love from any close one (whether it's a partner, parent, friend, etc) should never be controlling, toxic nor overwhelming to the point it makes you argue or hate them. Would you tolerate a friend controlling your life no right? Same thing. Are those really the actions of any loving parent?

Yes

No

Updates

+1 y

How is behaving in that manner looking out for your best interest or wanting what's best for you? How about only voicing your opinion once in a civilized manner (NOT a ''break up with that idiot'') and don't keep insisting if your child wants to be in that relationship?

Updates

+1 y

Constantly voicing their disapproval in a rude, toxic manner is only them showing what they feel, what they would like but nothing about what their child wants, how their child feels. It's all about them.

[Twalli]

If your parent has issues with your SO, you need to see why that is. Most people don't know that they're being taken advantage of. Your parents can see that. It's important to answer why your patients dislike your SO, because it may be to the benefit of you. My sister dated a few shit guys. They were ultimately good for her because 1) She didn't want to marry them and 2) She needed to be put on a pedestal for a while. So while it was worrying, it's a lot better now and she fixed the self worth problem she had.

[Danielle93]

Yes and once the parent has voiced their concerns once or twice (in a calm, civilized manner), they don't need to continue repeating them nor throwing those fiascos/tantrums I've mentioned on my post.

[Danielle93]

How is ''Dumb that idiot guy/girl already, dumb'' (that sort of nagging for instance) going to even solve things? The will only make their child distance themselves from the parent.

[pigoat]

Depends


Most times probably not

[Danielle93]

I could understand if they voice their concerns in a civilized manner once or twice (without resorting to name callings) but then leave you to your own judgement. Anything else afterwards, naggings, insulting your spouse or throwing those fiascos/tantrums or ultimatums is controlling, toxic behavior.