How can I be brave about being bisexual?

[lakotabebebe]

Being gay is something I slowly came to terms with as a little kid (around 11). I couldn't believe it when I found myself staring at my crushes- crushes that are girls! I turned to everything I could and nothing gave me the "cure" for what I was feeling. Years later, I accepted myself and I found confidence in what I thought was wrong. I come out to everyone and everyone was so cool about it. I made so many friends who knew what I was going through!

However... Things have changed. My best friend admitted she didn't like that I was gay. She kinda forced me to be straight again... Otherwise I'd lose her as a friend. She said if I was having a gay wedding then she wouldn't go. She felt uncomfortable with me being gay, so I changed for her. I told her I liked guys now... Now she believes that I'm straight. It doesn't cross her mind that I really don't care what gender I date.

I get super sad thinking that I'll have to sacrifice my happiness for not just her, but for everyone I know that wants me to be straight. I don't want to lose people I love but I also don't feel right rejecting girls... I want to be happy... How can I be brave?

[Luopio27]

If your best friend likes you more than as friend, its understandable that she is forcing you to choose between a guy and her.


But if its just anti LGBT phobia or hatred, then there is no rel friendship any more, just efforta to turn you into someone else.

[boggboss]

Nothing to do with being brace its to do with facts u can't pick and choose what u are if u are attracted to females and males your bi if its only females its gay unless its one off the vast other ones decide if u want to live a lie or be truthful to yourself

[Agape93]

It doesn’t require bravery, it just requires you to be yourself and to not hide from that. If you’re into a woman, ask her out. If you’re into a man, same deal.

[SnakeBoop]

Well she wasn't your best friend, and you can find one who isn't a homophobe. Never change yourself to please one person, unless that person is YOURSELF.

[mattissebfan5]

@SnakeBoop yes exactly

[DaveToo]

No one else lives in your skin or your brain. Only you and it's only you that have to live with your choices in life. If you are gay then you're gay. They can't change the chemistry that makes you who you are. If they were truly your friends they would accept you as you are, not as they want you to be.

[OlderAndWiser]

"I'll have to sacrifice my happiness for not just her, but for everyone I know that wants me to be straight."

Does that mean that you date guys but you are not happy dating guys and you want to be only with women?

[lakotabebebe]

What I mean by that is I force myself to "date" guys I don't like whenever I'm in a relationship with a girl. I pretend who I'm dating is a guy in order to make her think I'm not gay.

[OlderAndWiser]

So you aren't really dating any guys?

[lakotabebebe]

Not as of now. I dated one or two, but in all fairness I haven't had any dates ever since I've became best friends with her.

[Ogopogo]

This strikes me as really toxic, and it also occurs to me she might be attracted to you but won't allow herself to act on it, so she hates the idea of you with other women. If this is not the case then what she's doing is shitty and ridiculous. If you were bisexual and she was leaning on you to favor male partners there are ways to justify that, but you clearly are not interested in men, so what this girl is really doing is trying to make you just not have a romantic partner.

[Huldusonur]

These people aren't your friends, they're friends with the person they want you to be. You shouldn't be what they want you to be, you should be what YOU want to be. Turn your back on them, burn that fucking bridge and be your true self. You'll never be happy living a life you don't agree with. Hell, if you won't have any friends left after doing that, I'll be your friend. There are thousands of people around the world who you could inspire just by being yourself.

[Anonymous]

Dump her homophobic ass. You deserve a best friend who appreciates you no matter what your sexuality is.

[mattissebfan5]

She is not your friend