I don’t have any friends from my school years. How do you make friends as an adult. I don’t have a lot in common with most people my age, and am at a loss as to find people I have things in common with.
Don't listen to the rest of these people. If you can easily make friends by going to a starbucks or the gym, then nobody would ever be lonely in this world. Making friends isn't easy. You don't make a friend just by having one conversation with a stranger. I have been trying to make friends for a long time now. here's what I've learned:
1. You need to go to places where you need to see the same people over and over again. It is familiarity along with an activity that bonds two people together over a period of time that creates friendships. You don't just make friends by sitting in a coffee shop, talking to one person then never seeing them again. Believe me, I've tried it, it doesn't work.
2. Do not try to make personal friends at work. Overwhelming majority of people do not make friends from work even if you both get along very well. The chances of you both meeting up outside of work is slim to none. You're better off not wasting your energy.
Best places to make friends :
gym classes where you see same people over and over again. hobby / activity classes where you see the same people a lot. go volunteering with a group of people.
Make friends with people with similar expectations such as those who are at the same education and income as you. If you try to be friends with oncologists or professors, you might have a harder time cause those people get chased down for friendship by hundreds of people but not everybody is that popular.
We tend to make friends in the following types of setting.
work - colleagues we might got for a meal or drink with, often a lot are in the same boat and just need a push or suggestion to go to the pub go bowling etc, this then becomes regular and a circle of friends develops. Yes it does need people at work to socialise with, so some job mean this is not possible.
Hobbies, interests, clubs, same as above need to get people to do stuff outside simply meeting at club etc. I was in a book club when lived near Birmingham and we would meet in pub to discuss books but also just socially.
Gym - similar but is usually best to suggest going running outside etc.
going to a regular coffee shop, pub and just being social with people, chatting and being nice.
if have kids, then it’s after crèche or school drop off, go for a coffee etc and develop from there.
sometimes you have to work at it and crash n burn other times it just happens
This is a big problem in our modern society. The older you get, the harder it is to make friends, It is said that friendships are getting more scarce. I think social media is partially to blame. People do not take the time to get to know anyone. Not just in dating. At 50 years old I find that I have lost contact with almost all my friends over the years. Working on a career and raising a family were my main focus. Now that my kids have moved out on their own I find I an isolated. Covid made this worse. I have reached out to a couple of people I knew from my past and it worked out a little. I also have met a couple of guys at the gym that I have been talking to. Nothing too drastic. I also have made a couple of friends on GaG that have been good listeners I guess my advice is to get out and meet people. Just be friendly and see where it leads.
Get out and do things you like and you'll meet others that are probably into the same things. Join groups related to your interests. For example if you like hiking, join a local hiking group or take a class on it. Join Facebook groups related to your interests and connect with group members. Talk to your neighbors and get to know them. If you work, get to know your coworkers.
For myself, just by being myself, being friendly, talking to people.. You can be friends with people even if you don't share all the same interests. Having some things in common is nice but for me not totally necessary. Sometimes it's nice to have friends with different interests or views, that's a way to learn new things or see things in a different perspective... Good luck in your search for friends... Just remember one quality friend is better than lots of fake or fair weather friends
there's an app called meetup if you’re not in the US then I don't know but go on it find your interest and show up. That’s it that’s all if you truly don’t have many genuine friends. I suggest a girls group first. I already have close friends I created a group within my area since I was open to meeting new people but it was more toward professionals within my field for networking.
When my kids were little, I made friends with other moms by inviting them to come over with their kids for a playdate and coffee. I would always invite a couple of moms and their kids along for activities. It's pumpkin season which is great for finding things like hay rides or mini pumpkin painting activities. You could invite several to your backyard for crafts and cookies.
You have to find common interests, Suburugirl-babe. Best way is to join something—a club, a team, a church or social. Another is to find a bar with folks - volunteer. Plenty of organizations to volunteer, and who else would you enjoy their company than those who give?
I'd like to try to be your friend if you want. Strictly friends. Maybe we think alike or have similar attitudes. Anyway if not then don't reply to this. If you'd like to try then comment below. Then again you are married so I doubt your husband wants you being friends with some random dude on the net.
This is a very hot topic for me right now. I am 25 years old. I feel that I really lack new acquaintances, more from a professional point of view. Old friends are fine, but I want new ones. I try to communicate more with colleagues at work, with new colleagues, go to friends' hangouts, where there is a chance of new acquaintances.
In the world today, with cancel culture and judgement, it is difficult to share things because of the fear of being considered abnormal, ignorant or evil. It is a huge barrier to finding meaningful friendship. We have devolved from Classical Liberal learning back to tribal fear and loathing of others. Politics and social media and propaganda media has caused most of this and it is shameful.
A lot of people don't have much in common with people their age, sometimes they go with someone older. I'd say work. I find friends at work or just going out doing things you like,
Asking question instead of shooting in people DM.. Clearly says.. You don't know the way... I just shot a DM at @tania16 today.. Getting to know her a little.. Time will decide.. If we end up being friends or acquaintances.. 🤔
It depends on your interests what you like doing as in shopping , reading, exploring new places then search for clubs in your city which similar to your interests, dont think age is a barrier and you are already well settled in life
One dollar at a time. no im kidding anywhere there are people around. Remember just like a kid just start talking to someone just dont say to much and nothing stupid but be funny
That is the elephant in the room when you going to take a stand against the man that's when you find out nobody has a plan so they won't stand. I remember the old days your friends always had your back as the decades have passed by here we are my man.
Once you are older you don't have the same choices as when you are younger and going to school. Once you get older I'd say work or friends of friends would bevit
Unfortunately, this is a problem with our whole generation. Best advice that I can think of is to start deleting all social media so that you, first, return to being human.
Go to a place you enjoy a lot. You will find people who are likeminded. Something activity based like gyms, book clubs and your kids school. It might not happen right away but give it time. Better to find a good person than any after all.
I mean I don’t think I get out enough to project anything. After working full time, managing the house and caring for my child and husband, I don’t get out much
@Subarugirl The fuck did you expect? Tell you some magical incantation to get friends? Things take effort and work, and if you're not throwing down than don't expect anything. Guess that's my perspective as a man then.
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