Parents, how do you handle bickering between your children? How did your parents handle the bickering between you and your siblings?
I would make them look at it a different way I would look at it and say so what are you guys fighting about and they would explain it to me. And I would say okay cool so how long are you guys going to do this for and they would say whatever they're going to say what ever it is they're going to say and then I would say will you guys come here and help me do this for a minute because it's really ice cold outside and we'd walk outside I would let them go first and then I would lock the door as we went out the door and I'd stand there and look at them I said no no no no no no if you guys want to play that way play outside that way together don't get me involved something stupid like that and they would say you're not involved I was just yes I am you involve me if I can hear you arguing you're involving me so you guys just go have fun play play dice just like you're playing in here really nice let's start to walk away and it starts banging on the door and I say wait a minute don't be banging on my door and they would have been saying come on dad open the door I would say open the door but what are you guys going to do for me not argue and I would say I don't care if you argue I don't even care if you beat each other up just do it quietly because then they wouldn't know what to think I open up the door I would say come on in that you're going to go back outside if you start to argue you're going to have to do that outside and then they would start playing together anyway I would say go get your coats and go build a snowman or something and they would get their coats on and go outside and then be back in 5 minutes later there freezing is even run to the door and they would be playing together nicely it's just a moment in time the reserve excited about something 4 they're excited about something or one of them is being a grouch they get over quite quickly sometimes you got to tell you to do that don't you got to tell them to argue that way they don't know what's going on with you why are you telling us that and then I would say something like because I want to see who you're going to grow up to act like kids want to think they want discipline they want to think about things but when they don't understand what you're saying you think about it even deeper like I said remember it's just a moment in time it will pass you don't discipline for it you don't put him on restriction for it you give them more responsibility look at you guys are going to act like that I want you to go over here and do this whatever this might be but they have to do it together
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Maybe because you see it as them actually not liking each other? Which might not be the case
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I don't have kids so no idea how you handle this. Would probably drive me nuts. I like a very quiet, peaceful, home.
Can you banish them to their rooms every time they do it? Or would that just isolate everyone and make the family less connected?
I imagine kids behave like this because they can. They act on impulse, and don't try to control themselves with their siblings, and at home, they'll bicker and push everyone to their limits until there is a consequence they can't tolerate.
Can you treat them like two family pets who fight with each other but work it out amongst themselves in the end? Probably not. Too many age differences, one could be more of a bully than the other who is more passive and accommodating. Plus, what a racket they would make. Pack animals have hierarchies and it works for them.
The thing is, at a certain age, kids know what they should do. They've more than been taught how to behave. They just don't want to. So then what are the consequences?
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My parents would scream at us to shut up every time, which was counterproductive because we never learned how to actually solve conflicts and just built up years of resentment for each other
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I let them bicker and don’t get involved unless they’re doing something actually dangerous to each other. Reasons being A) I think it’s necessary for kids/siblings to fight and have arguments, and to learn to solve it on their own and B) I know it can’t be solved by me. Me and my brother would fight each other multiple times a day growing up and there was nothing my parents did (or could have done for that matter) that ever made us stop other than very temporarily. My brother and I did (and do) love each other very much though and we’ve always been very close and still are. The fighting between siblings really has nothing to do with their relationship or true feelings for each other. They can love each other more than anything and always be ready to defend the other and still fight like cat and dog all the time. Basically, siblings fight and it’s natural.
I feel I need to mention that if I felt that one of them was always the underdog or almost like bullied by the other I would intervene in a completely different way, but this is not the case with my kids. -
Lol my mother didn’t handle it at all. She couldn’t handle my brother practicing WWE moves on me as a kid. Me and my siblings would go straight to the phone and call my dad if we wanted each other to be disciplined. I’m sure my dad used to get aggravated as hell that he would be called up often while he was working lol
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When my kids were younger, and they were fighting, we usually just separated them and sent them to different places. Then, after they had time to calm down, we usually asked them to apologize to each other. It didn't eliminate bickering and fights, but it defused them... most of the time.
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My grandma use to make us sit in the corner and hug and my grandma was little but she was no joke she would whoop your ass one time I kicked her when I was little and she kicked me back hard I hit the ground and couldn’t get back up had a big knot on my shin I swear I still have scar tissue there from it forty something years later grandma didn’t play really neither did my mom both could be mean when necessary
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Leave them alone...
Let them deal with this type of situation it will help them to grow up. Don't interrupt. -
My mom has her favorite so at home my mom would always take my older half sister side and never listen to me til this day I can't handle looking at her.
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We used to try and separate them. It was not always possible so there was always lots of yelling and screaming involved. My brother and I used to fight all the time and I think my parents just threw up their hands after a while.
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My ex wife was the disciplinary but she would just separate them and put them in separate rooms or in the corner
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My own mother had a silent look. My sister and I were old souls though, I don’t ever remember bickering with her.
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Parents busted my ass we stopped the bickering. I busted my kids ass they bickered at each other one time. After that they were very happy to talk things out and not pick at each other.
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My mom just yelled at us and theathen to hit us if we didn't stop.
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Mom would always intervene and start yelling lmao.
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I used to kick my brothers in the balls all the time. My mom never knew how to handle that, so I kept doing it.
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Shut up or you both get spankings
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Tell them to cool it or they’re grounded.
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I allways fight with life by myself, when I was 16 I left house...
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