Should I be worried about leaving my son (under a year old) home alone with his dad (28yo)?

[Anonymous]

My SO has NEVER been left to his own devices when it comes to our son for longer than 30min. He won't bathe our son or change his poopy diapers without help & he pretty much refuses to dress him because our son HATES getting changed & will cry until he is dressed & standing. Last time I fell asleep before our son was I was woken up to put him to sleep! Like, come on man!

Well, on October 19th of this year I AM GOING to a concert with my mom (46yo this year) to see Mary J. Blige, it's her birthday present & she wants me to go along with her. I'm worried that my SO will freak out/get frustrated like he normally does when he "helps" with the baby & he isn't doing just "the fun things". My mom even offered to miss the first two acts of the show so I can get my son close to being down before we leave. My SO said we don't have to miss any of the show, but I'm not too sure on that...

Should I stop worrying & just let him handle it or should I stay as long as we can & get the baby down before leaving?

[77five]

1. Are you guys still together or do you just coparent?
2. If you guys are still in a relationship, please dont be anymore. Not sure how you could stay with a whole adult who refuses to care for their own child. Thats a sign for the rest of your guys’ future together.
3. Just for the concert, give him some pointers before you leave. But its really up to you. You know him better than us. Shaken Baby syndrome is real and you need to consider whether he’d be so frustrated that he’d shake the baby out of that frustration. If he ever gets overwhelmed its best to put the baby down in a safe place and let it scream its head off rather than the dad hurting it.
4. When you get back, you really need to reevaluate the relationship and the dad’s lack of parenting. This isn't ok or acceptable.

[77five]

I missed you saying the concert is a month away. Now that I know that, do everything I said to do NOW. I can't believe its a month a away and your concern is how he’ll do on that night. Worry about parenting NOW. Jesus christ…

[Apple1996]

If you trust that he will keep the baby safe then yeah it'll probably be fine. Sometimes being alone will help the parent figure out how to care for the child.

And that is still a month away so maybe do some small test like leave him to put the baby down to bed while you take a bath or are busy with something else.

[TrillXHippy]

Have another family member help you out with your baby

[Smoke-n-Growls]

Wow, he needs help.

Does your SO have a good relationship with his parents? Would they be good resources to help him learn how to parent?

If not, maybe after the concert your mom can help teach your SO how to care for his child.

He needs to get over himself and learn to care for his own fucking child. 🤦🏽

[jimmy2]

Damn I would not try one of your mothers