What you do is wait until it is the right time to have children. I find it odd that he is 13 years older than you and yet cannot figure that out on his own. Sounds incredibly immature. Now, I get where he might be coming from. He may be thinking he doesn't want a newborn too much later in life.
I get that. However, he knew when you got married the age difference. He should have thought about that first. If it were me, I would simply say I don't want to because of the importance of finishing my schooling.
That is a huge thing getting a PhD in anything. Also, a ton of work. You have already committed to do it and would almost certainly have to give that up to care for a new child in your life.
Sorry if I was harsh about your husband, but he does seem really immature. I think you know that and why you put the "he plays playstation" part in there, which really has nothing to do with the question.
Perhaps you did that subconsciously because you already know what the answer is.
So... if one person isn't ready for a baby, the relationship isn't ready for a baby. I would say the same thing if the roles were reversed here.
He needs to respect the fact that you're not ready yet and that you have goals you want to meet before you have a child. If he can't respect that, then unfortunately, he doesn't seem to respect you or your goals.
You didn't say no to the baby. You just said not right now.
I would get a sonogram with pregnant. If a male is hesitant then general conversation relating to heritage and lineage will eventually have an effect. If the female is hesitant then she ought to consider that the above is important to the husband. People get divorced for less these days. Good luck on working it all out.
Having a child is the single best thing I have been a part of in my life and I have had a lot of cool experiences.
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Have you considered that you will be well into your 40's by the time you've finished studying and what not... And your husband will be pushing mid 50's.
Just why the hell did you ever get married in the first place?
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