How come nothing I do is good enough for mother?

[Bethany22]

I'm starting to become more social than I was previously, which is something that I know should be extremely good news to my mother. But I can just see her eventually finding ways to make it look like I didn't make enough of an effort with these new friends. Furthermore, she's probably going to deny that she cares so much about me having friends, and will probably rearrange the facts in order to make herself look good and the victim, and me look like the overemotional, overly critical one that simply didn't understand her intentions. Should I go to a psychologist? I'm SICK of this pattern.

[Guy13]

Guessing:Aging and sickly Mothers are not right. Still though, domineering and incessant critiques have to be regulated by child or controlled by Parent on their own.
Every Parent, especially Mom, have an opinion and restraint lessens as they age. Opinion is fine but harping is not acceptable. I have found in these times …grab both hands…in the eyes 👀…love you Mom but have to go. The only downside is having to learn that the sought after attention and love has to be given on the front end in initial greeting…At that point the same reaction and Exit at “harping”…overtime with separation can lead to a softening in reaction to child.
Dealing with an adult child, with behavioral and impulse control issues brought on by Age, often is exhausting. Good luck 🍀.

[BJP21]

Sounds like a certain degree of toxicity your mom creates. Being more sociable is the most healthy thing you can do for yourself. Is your mom always by herself?

[Bethany22]

Yes she is. She's single too which makes it worse

[NotTacocaT6969]

Stop caring what your mother thinks.


Be your own person, live your own life and create your own success without worrying if it’s good enough for someone else.


It’s YOUR life, not theirs.

[RealMarek]

Read up on narcissistic personality disorder. If it rings any bells, it would be good to get some counseling to see if a professional thinks she might have it and to learn how to deal with it.

[slatyb]

You might get some therapy so you can accept that your mother is never going to be supportive.

[nawtee_me]

You recognize the pattern so it is up to you not to allow her to go down that same rabbit hole. Just keep pointing out that your changes are a good thing for both you and her. That you love her and you are looking out for her too.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

This is something we try to do for people and so sad it's never enough, so I can tell what you are going through.

[Sparkie460]

Your mom sounds like a very toxic woman. She reminds me of my mother in law. Nothing my wife does is good enough for her.
You need to do what makes you happy. Stop trying to please everyone else.

[Sixgunsound]

Nothing I do is good enough for my mother either. We stopped talking a long time ago.

[Sixgunsound]

You don't need to go seek professional help and risk your career and freedom because your mother's a horrible person. I didn't blame myself for my mother's actions.

[Alex8736]

the bottom line is what makes you and only you happy? it don't matter what others think because they have their own issues they need to deal with

[Shy_Steve]

I sort of feel the same way about my Father.

[TallAnon]

Probably because it's something she's lacking herself and instead of putting in the effort to solve it for herself, it's much easier to project that on your kids and claim their achievements as your own.

[Staximus]

Sounds like your mom is narcissistic, manipulative, and gaslights people. Just tell her to mind her own business.

[Speedydude]

STOP TALKING TO YOUNGER WOMAN!!!

[NathanDavis]

maybe it is time to leave her...

[OddBeMe]

Same here. So I said fck my mother. And did what I want.

[Softguy]

Same way i feel about women, nothing i do is good enough, i can't talk to girls but they still expect me to even though i'm a nice guy.

[Alperengin11]

Its your life she has to respect that. If you are unhappy I would stay in your comfort zone.

[In_Trance]

Why don't you talk to her about it?

[Bethany22]

I have, and like I say, she gaslights and tries to pretend that me having friends isn't that important to her

[pizzalovershouse]

Some parents are like that

[Debbie14217]

wow so sad good luck

[Speedydude]

B cuz u r racist

[Anonymous]

Mom's want the best for their kids.