How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

Question

AmeerX · Accepted Answer

I was always trying to do what my mother wanted till I was in university then I was stuck with doing what my father wanted. Even marriage is not of my choice. I don't know what to do.

I used to work really really hard. To prove my brothers never got good results. I got medals and distinctions but they are just paper weight now 😔. I expected my father will one day tell me, "Son you can go to so and so country" but I never got that. I have siblings that don't want to marry and being young one I am the sacrificial lamb 🐑. My mom and her brothers were the real reason my siblings are in this poor state of affairs. I mean she had kids and she spend 18-20 years trying to marry her brother over her children and the end result, uncle got married to a gold digger in the end at age 45. And it is just painful to think. Let's keep things private.

Dad tells me I am the epitome of loyalty and trust for him. But I don't know what to feel about it. I just keep doing what he tells me without objecting much.

Would be great if someone gave me some good insights. I am not insecure but come on what should I do? My siblings got opportunity to go live a good life somewhere else years ago and they are all like, you can't afford our breads? We hate you daddy 😞. I start to feel upset thinking about it.

Despite this, I never even got an offer where dad said, "Oh son, as service to the family, you are now free to do what you like, marry whoever you like, or even enjoy life". I didn't get to enjoy most my life. I hate it.

Note: In my real life I don't left this sadness come on to my face but it's whatever life is becoming. I don't self pity either. These words ring in my ear from someone I know, "Happiness is within us, fine if I am divorced and alone I am happy".

I now only live to see the chaos that may be hidden left or right and may be just may be I find some salvation in helping someone else.

I sometimes wish Chinese or the Russians colonized our country then caring about Ukraine or Taiwan. They would find it a lot more easy anyways to control these subservient people

bigpauly · Accepted Answer

My family is real close. My siblings are all close and my “little” sis is one of my best friends. Our parents are also very loving. I do feel fortunate with that family I have and don’t know how I would have gotten through my childhood without them.

PrettyPriya · Accepted Answer

Well, for the first part of your question, I can say that my family is very close. I would say my younger sister and I are the closest. The two of us are very close to our mom. That is not to say we are not close to our dad as well. It is just a different dynamic.

I can't comment on how other people around me viewed their childhood versus mine. What I can say is that my childhood all the way until I was out of university was very happy.

I was fortunate to grow up in a fairly privileged family. That does not mean we were just given things. I think that was one of the greatest things that our parents taught us. They made us work for the perks of being from a family that had means.

We were all to maintain grades, have jobs and be productive in general. In return, our educations were paid for and we got to go to private schools. I remember that my dad said that I had to have summer jobs during school. I used to babysit just about every day two boys in our neighborhood.

I only mention this because it instilled values that are often lost anymore. That sense of if you want something, you need to work hard. We had a very happy household.

Lynnfriend · Accepted Answer

No not really, my mother was mentally ill and my father worked 6 days a week. He was a good provider and I loved him very much now that I am older I appreciate him we were lucky to have him a lot of father's would have run off and left us. But his infadelites have caused problems with my
relationships with men. I always felt insecure growing up because of the growing devoice rate when I was a child, slot of my friends parents were devoriced I was afraid they would get devoriced so I grew up with more worries than kids should have

aaron210419 · Answer

My family never seemed close, after my mom left my dad things were even less close. My dad passed away last year and I wasn't able to go to the funeral, my mom was always there but we were never really close, at least not enough for me to actually confide in her. Now she has Lou Gehrig's Disease and I see her here and there. Growing up I always used my experience as an example of what not to do when I had my own family. Unfortunately I married a narcissist who left after 9 years in the most hateful way possible, and has my 11 year old daughter believing that I don't want to see her.
As of now my 2 younger sisters live on opposite ends of the country, and all of my half brothers and sisters (from my dad's marriages before my mom) live just as far.
I still would like to have my own family and break the cycle of failed relationships my family seems to have always been caught up in, even after everything. If it weren't for everything I've been through is
I'm sure I'd be a much different person, everything I have I've worked for and always done everything for myself, and it's thanks to being surrounded by bad examples.

SnowedIn · Answer

The family I grew up with is neither close nor warm. It was, in fact, pretty shitty. My two older brothers were distant, mostly because of age and then they went off to boarding school. My dad was sort of warm but he was either off on travel or at work. My mom was nice but interested in appearances only, drinking, and smoking. Very few cousins that I didn't know and we didn't visit. Loved my grandmother though, until she died when I was 17. So, there was no abuse, just no... warmth. I don't have lots of memories good or bad.

As for my childhood, I was happy. I don't think I was happier than most, but probably happier than some. I had books. And friends. And a cat.

Wish4UrB00ty · Answer

Well. I’m the youngest of five. And about the middle of sixteen grandkids on my moms side. if you are talking about immediate family we are pretty close. My mom home schooled most of us and we learned to get along very well. My dad was a had working and caring father and did a lot for his sons as well. As for extended family, I as I said there is sixteen grandkids and family reunions can hit over a hundred if we all showed up. Just from three generations back. It’s weird how close we all are. Lol! But there is some distancing here and there.

Agape93 · Answer

If there was warmth, I never got to feel it. I was largely neglected and emotionally abused by most of my family, and in frequent fear from my dad's brother. The only family I know, that cares at all about me, are in other countries. They were rarely there growing up.

melanieeeB · Answer

Uhm my biological relatives hate each other to the core and would sell your organs for a few euros lol

My chosen family is pretty close, we support each other cause we have the same type of relatives. My childhood with my relatives was awful and traumatic, my late childhood with my family was way greater

msc545 · Answer

Actually, it was pretty terrible. My parents were very unhappy with each other and that really showed up in our family life in a very bad way. My mother never really stopped complaining about every single thing she could think of. My father was depressed and unhappy with the entire situation. The rest of my family was comprised of people that had lots of problems.

Wicked_Witch · Answer

My mom and my siblings and I are all real close. My dad wasn’t the best but luckily my mom left him and has a great husband now. My childhood I consider average. We had a lot of spouts but I guess that will happen when you have 3 girls under one roof.

NathanDavis · Answer

close yes... but warm? not so much, we're not that affectionate or tender

we met from time to time, so the closeness and the care is there for sure

and that is just how we grew up with one another... the nieces however, those two are showered with the warmest of love by everyone lmao...

which, is a great thing, of course

jennifer_bloom · Answer

I had an abusive mother who hated me from the day I was born and an abusive dad who always sided with mom instead of me because I was a child and not able to pay him back for defending and protecting me. Now I hate them both. I obey them and take care of them but I hate them, in the same way you hate rude customers at work but you still do what they tell you to.

letuswaltzforthedead · Answer

Somewhat, I have a close relationship with a few of my relatives but haven't really been in touch with others. In terms of warmth, some people are 2/5 stars while others are 4/5 stars and many express it in different ways which take getting used to.

Msputiton · Answer

Yes. My family life is and was amazing. God blessed me to be born to a mother and father, who made sure i was the happiest child alive

exitseven · Answer

My parents got divorced when I was in high school. I think I only saw them kiss once when my father was in the hospital. They were both good parents. I sort of grew up never seeing what a good relationship looked like And that made it hard to make one for myself.

WhitneySnow · Answer

There were good things and bad things about my childhood. My parents are close and warm with my and my sister when they’re around, not so much with each other.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

Childhood was shit... mom was a slut. I got tossed from Great grand parents to Aunt and Uncle and spent a total of about 3 years with slut mom. I want nothing to do with any of them now. I love my wife's family more than I love my own.

Berethor · Answer

Nope and nope, my family is not close, and my childhood was not great.

Tina19 · Answer

Luckily i was born in such a family where they hsve strong bond with eachother and being a single child in family i am always pampered i feel very grateful for such loving supportive understanding family

hypojoe · Answer

I was neglected as a kid im not close to my family now they tried to right the wrongs but the damage was already done i have been alone for a long time sometimes it bothers me

Paul_in_Indy · Answer

I have a very large family who are all very close. I am not proximate to them these days, but I remain “close.”

Rockstarrrrr · Answer

My family is great and I had a great childhood...

LimitedBenefits101 · Answer

Had great childhood and im very close with my family except my older sister, she had abortion and that ended our bond.  But i'm very close with my little sister, she's a year older than you.

The_Shadow_Dweller · Answer

Maybe not my childhood, but my present for sure.

bean2k21 · Answer

My mother was a prostitute and my father was half man/half animal from what I understand. I roamed the wilderness, emerging whenever I sensed a young woman in need of discipline, obedience, and orgasmic enlightenment.

ChiTown33 · Answer

Based on most people I talk to and a lot the people on this site, most definitely.

Paulychicagoluv · Answer

If I go into this, I'd have to go see a shrink

Hirushan · Answer

Among the our family members relationship is normal.

panamared1 · Answer

Had a good childhood I am sure it was happier than some, I have no complaints

SlavicThor · Answer

I'm an orphan

maximumpower · Answer

We're not and no.

KerriH · Answer

I think it was

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