Now that you're not a child does what your father told you and what he went through mean anything to you. Do you feel his pain now?

[Sofargone93]

[Zenpanda]

He worked hard, tried his best to prevent me from getting hurt and has always been nice to me.
I respect that.
He had a lot of trouble accepting that I've been really different.
Hairstyles, clothes, being pansexual.
He never got angry at me or rejected me.
So all in all I have a great dad.
And he knows that, because I let him know.

[Sofargone93]

What is love for 3000 😅

[Beckybooboo]

I definitely knew he went through a lot! He worked hard at a job he didn’t particularly like and did it all for his family. He’s a very quiet man but has an amazing strength to him that you just feel when he’s around. I see him in my oldest brother. My brother works hard for his family and like my dad and I would say most fathers in general, they don’t want awards or recognition, they just wanna be appreciated and respected. And I definitely do!

[Sofargone93]

Fuckin right.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

I have an explanation as to why my dad fucked up when he did when he struggled to parent a daughter that was so different from him. An explanation is not a resolution, and my dad probably could do with the same therapy I got, not that I can convince him to get it.

[Sofargone93]

Did you ever think your father uses his pain as fuel to move forward. Men dont go to therapy because we know the answer to our own problems. There's no cure for pride other than rock bottom.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

He uses his pain to run his business, not attend to his family. He escapes his problem with a job he could have retired from 10 years ago

[Sofargone93]

And all your asking for is for your father to be present instead of investing his time in a job he doesn't have to do. All you want to is your dad to present.

[Sofargone93]

The moment a man stops working.. is the moment he gets old really fast. He's not ready yet. Your job is to be there regardless.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

I do not have to do anything for my father, his job was to raise me to adulthood and he succeeded. That’s what he was supposed to do. I do not owe him a debt for that and if you want to suggest that I do, then I’m glad you have such a positive relationship with your parents that you’re willing to drop everything for them when they need you.

[Sofargone93]

My father was a doctor. My mom was a model. They both did drugs. My father did things to my mom. My mom did things to my dad. They both had their truth. I listened to my mom for years because my dad was absent and it made sense... But when I met my father for the first time at 15 . He told me things are not what they seem. He told me he did the things my mother told me. He was up front and real. So when you go through life wondering why dad is the way he is. Or mom is the way she is... There's always 3 sides to a story. Her side , his side and the truth. Does it matter no. Does it hurt Yea... But I understand the pains of both my parents. I just make sure I love them as hard as I can regardless of them being absent. They will get old. I will be there to help them. Why? Because I'm supposed to honor my mother and father. I don't have to like them. Just love them. And when they get old. I'll be there. You have to live through some shit and still be sane to understand.

[John_Cobretti]

Yeah adulthood is fun as we assumed when we were kids

[John_Cobretti]

I mean NOT fun

[Sofargone93]

I'm still childish. I still do donuts when I get the chance.

[John_Cobretti]

Haha my man!

[Sofargone93]

Amen

[Beckybooboo]

@Sofargone93. Lol!! I tried to do a 🍩 on snow in my school parking lot. Ended up hitting a light pole! I had mentioned my dad is a very quiet man, yes, even then he didn’t say much. Of course I was crying and he just said in a very calm voice, “unless you think you’re hurt, go to your room and we’ll talk about it tomorrow”. We never really did talk about it.

[Anonymous]

Not even a bit. He was an neglectful dick and a pedophile enabler