I'm a crossdresser, but my boyfriend gnores me in front of his friends. He plays the " bad boy " in front of his friends. What can I do about it?

[Anonymous]

His friends and family don't know he's gay, etc.

[Anonymous]

Well is he planning to come out at some point, or is your relationship going to remain secret indefinitely? It's perfectly reasonable for him to want to wait to come out until he feels safe/able to, but it's also perfectly reasonable for you to want a relationship you don't have to hide. That difference of timeline could potentially be a deal breaker for you both, but it's worth at least having the conversation. Maybe he's just waiting for a specific time, like when he's financially independent from his parents if he's not already. Maybe he is still stuck in the questioning or bargaining phase, trying to figure out if it's worth it to come out at all if he has to risk losing one family to potentially gain/build a new one. If you're wanting this to be serious these are things you should be able to to about at some point...

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

It sounds like he's just ashamed of who he is if he pretends to be something else when he's with his friends. You need to decide if someone like that is who you want to be with and just be his dirty little secret.

[Asker]

Yes, but at the same time, I don't want to leave him because when we're together, he's really cute and kind to me.

At the same time, I can't go on living with someone who's ashamed of who he is.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

That isn't a healthy relationship then. He either needs to come out and be who he is in private with you or you need to go and be with someone who can be just as sweet and caring but isn't treating you like a dark secret.

[Asker]

Yes true

[In_Trance]

Not sure what the crossdresser part has to do with anything but whatever
If you want to be noticed then give him reason to notice you

[Asker]

What I mean is that when it's just the two of us, he's really super nice and cute.

But then outside, with his friends etc. he plays the role of macho guy etc. ...