Am I the jerk for not lifting elderly relative off the floor?

[Anonymous]

She fell again. She asked me to come lift her and carry her every where Because she doesn't want to use her rollater or wheelchair. she isn't going to the hospital and I am a big girl and I should be able to carry her no problem.

I said hellno. We both could get hurt. She is giving all of her money away to her "business partner" and not paying her bills or buying food. I have given her food several times this month. I gave her a ride even though she was super nasty to me the whole time. We used to be close but she changed after the stroke. She felt betrayed I made her go to ER after the stroke and didn't lie and say she is fine.

She won't answer the door or let me in her house. I called adult protective services they said they can't do anything.

The neighbor and I both give her food but no money. and I told her next time this happened to call 911 because she needs more help than I can give. she is now In The hospital. Some Family members and her friend from this restaurant I use to go to yelled at me for not helping her. I said it's hard to help people who refuse it. .

Updates

5 mo

I probably should have been nicer but I just woke up and my dad who has dementia volunteered me to go do it. The big girl comment bothered me.

Updates

5 mo

I can't lift her off the floor

[strateguy632]

Not a jerk. You don't have insurance if you make any mistakes

[Mynameisbobby]

Not a jerk at all. You didn't know if she was hurt more than she appeared and you actually did the right thing not helping her up. You could have hurt her worse than she already was.

[beefcakebradybatson]

Couldn't agree more, Mynameisbobbyjoe !!!

[Mynameisbobby]

@beefcakebradybatson Right!

[Mynameisbobby]

Thanks for MHO

[Anonymous]

Have you not heard of the term "elder abuse"?

[Asker]

I tried to help and she ask me to leave. She wouldn't let me in the house. Me and the neighbors called leo adult protective services several times. She said everything was fine.
I bought food for her and she just left it.

[Massageman]

In most areas near us, there are actual classes that show helpers- those willing and able to help- special ways to lift people more easily, help them walk, etc.