Difference between catcalling a woman and complimenting a woman.

[Anonymous]

(boyfriend reacts to girlfriend getting catcalled)

Please read everything before you comment. Be respectfull and open to other opinions. Thank you

There is a big difference between catcalling a woman and giving a compliment. I really hope that everyone who reads this, never catcalled a woman.

Giving a compliment is like 'hey i think you are very pretty, can i maybe have your number'.

Catcalling is like yelling 'hey cutie! you're hot, gimme your number!'

My mom and i both have been catcalled. My mom got yelled at when she was in college. Things like 'Hey, psst' when she walked on the street. And then when she looked, dirty men quickly looked away. I got boys in groups yell things at me like 'hey girl. Yes you ahah' and guys hissing at me. It's creepy and i just start walking faster. A compliment is when a guy told me, he liked my hair. And asked if i went to the hairdresser.

I have seen video's on youtube where woman started catcalling men as a social experiment. First of all, i do not agree with that. It's wrong to catcall men who haven't even said anything to you. But i noticed that the guys actually saw it as a compliment. And started smiling. This explains why men see it as a compliment. Lots of them see catcalling as a compliment. Just because they would see it as a compliment. I think this is a difference between gender. Because when a woman catcalls a men, the men doesn't feel scared. Maybe a bit awkward because he isn't used to get 'complimented'. When a woman gets catcalled, she is scared of what the men could do to her. A man is bigger, stronger and sometimes doesn't accept 'no'. When a woman catcalls a men, the men is not scared. Since he knows woman won't do the things a man would do (most of the time). Maybe that also is why most men see it as a compliment. Just because they don't feel the same way, which is why they don't see the problem. But it is creepy.

Beside this, most catcallers do know that woman don't really like it. Still they keep doing it. What is the point of giving a 'compliment' when the person you're giving it to, doesn't see it as a compliment? The whole point of a compliment, is to make someone happy, not feel like a piece of shit. So even if you do mean it as a compliment, just don't do it, because we don't see it as a compliment. It doesn't matter how you mean it, what matters is how you make the other feel like.

I don't know if i forgot anything, but you can reply.

[loveslongnails]

I think you're forgetting something important. When men catcall a woman, it can't feel very threatening besides just being rude. Guys don't feel threatened if a woman cat calls them ! They are more likely to say " hey, don't just talk, show me something".

You really can't compare the dynamics between the two events. If a beautiful, or even average looking woman goes up to a group of men and says "I have condoms, 10 minutes, and a Bentley parked around the corner - who wants to fuck me", she'll get most of them volunteering. If a guy does the same to a group of women, he'll get mostly "fuck off". Maybe he'll get lucky because one woman might think "hmmm... this might be my only chance to do it in a Bentley" !! LOL

[myTake Owner]

Yes true. That really is a difference between gender lmao

[DavidDong]

It's a surprise when a girl cat calls a guy that's why it's a compliment, as a guy I'm basically always ready to bang and that can be frustrating at times.

I wouldn't cat call, it's too direct and feels rude, I'd do it the compliment way you said and work from that.

Yeah though, I dont think you need to be as afraid of men, you can call for help and a guy would be happy to backhand a creep. I certainly would.

Bear in mind that cat calling is basically fishing, they want action and aren't looking out for feelings and are baiting for a women who wants the same.

I agree with you though :/

You must be quite the looker :)
Can I have your number lol.

[myTake Owner]

Thank you haha. And sorry but no. I don't give my number away on this site.

[Ace_Chidorigafuchi]

here's the massive whopper :

Men have more trouble getting access to sex on avg. The girl doesn't.

If there is a single identifiable marker that tips the woman off that you are valuable and not one of the wide range of variation in men that is desperate for sex.. then you will be instantly put into a separate basket with other desirables.

We both have the biological imperative to f*ck. But because so many men are pathetic and desperate and aggressive for sex who are poor, ugly, or unconfident that it causes the wide divergence in outcomes for your proposed situation.

One way to prove this is by going to a place where typically the type of beta man would not be found easily, Spring Break beach or nightclub in a university town your odds will improve even if you change literally nothing about yourself, and even if no alcohol is consumed by the girl. Simply by virtue of odds of avoidance of a weirdo in that locale she won't have her guard up for it the same way.

[Mickey9999]

What you’re describing sounds like bullying not classic catcalling. Catcalling in the traditional sense is whistle or a “hey baby”. It’s usually don’t by males who are already taken and not intending to actually pick the woman up. I have had it happen several times in my lifetime and I’m view of it varies depending on the frame of mind I’m in and how it’s actually done by the men. I have catcalled a couple of boys back in my younger years that led to a few dates. So it should be done in a playful way not a rude, obnoxious, or bullying manner. There’s a big difference.

[myTake Owner]

catcallers also told me that. Things like 'hey baby'

[JosyJosy]

I think it's like in the manner of delivering it, the way of doing things. One is a disrespectful way that screams "SEX ALL I THINK IS SEX, SEX ME" It usually makes you feel like they're preying on you like a pack of wolves.

catcalling: let me grab that ass, baby!
compliment: I really want to let you know that you look really beautiful today.

[myTake Owner]

Yess!

[blank_expression]

I have never personally seen men catcalling but I did have some women messing with me. Catcalling is really from the lowest forms of primitives and just as an animal acts out. Compliments to a women, forget it; the potential fallout is too high. I genuinely complimented a woman once at a party that was married and while her husband was there, she started to give me an unsolicited back rub. I pulled away from it and I can say that didn’t go very well. I had zero interest in gaining her interests in me. Normally though, compliments to women are mostly seen as sexist anymore by most women that have been trained in the art of man-hate since birth by their feminist masters. Nope, anymore I just sit back and receive the compliments and attention from women, which is not considered sexist by the feminists. Unfortunately, this method only seems to attract the liberal women, that regardless of looks, nobody else can tolerate. If I am in a blue State, I let them come to me, which they do e. g. In a red State, I compliment more freely. Therefore, depending on the demographics of where you live, compliments can be either welcomed or a detriment.

[Yaaten]

Yeah, I can't relate to anything you've written here. At all. Your use of the expressions "liberal" and "blue state" tell me you live in the U. S., and as I understand it all the males over there have allowed themselves to be cowed into submission by their domineering, masculine females.

[talover]

I've never catcalled a woman... except my wife, but that doesn't count. She's already mine. With that being said, before marriage, I loved (and still do) complimenting woman on their beauty. I had an old college friend who was very pretty. The most captivating feature were her eyes. One day, I mustered the courage to look her in the eyes and say, "Nora, I've never told you before but I must say you have beautiful eyes." She turned away with shyness and came back to center, thanking me with a gleeful smile. We carried on with our lunch and nothing came of it. We're still friends many years later.

On another occasion, I had a friend who worked at a Macy's make-up department. She was naturally beautiful and needed no make-up (my opinion, of course). Once, when we were hanging out with other friends, she had no make-up on. Apparently it was her "lazy day." I took the window of opportunity to whisper in her ear, "your make up is always impressive, but your face is naturally pretty." I've used many other honest and sincere compliments that encourage woman. My wife, to this day, thinks I use a book or guide on how to compliment her. When I say a cheesy pick up line to her, for instance, she says, "where did you get that from?" WTF? 😁

[strawberrysouffle]

I second this. I feel a lot of man have taken the movement against catcalling to mean "you cannot compliment a woman", while that is of course not the point.

A month or so ago, I was walking in the city, minding my own business. I walk by two guys around my age. One of them says "Excuse me, hi" so I stop and ask "yes?" presuming they need directions or something. He then says "I just wanted to tell you that you look beautiful in that top." It made my day, I thought it was incredibly sweet of him to say that.

Another time I was on the bus and some dude keeps staring at me, then when he gets off he yells something along the lines of 'hot piece of ass' at me.

I don't know how the difference is unclear to some.

[myTake Owner]

That's the difference! and damn the first guy is sweet

[Rocco7070]

Womens treatment since forever is manafested in many ways, traditions and rituals. Whatever man does its going to somehow shoot off a distorted road. The main road is good but man always has to tinker with things, very often tto take power. However no matter whats going on I never catcall a woman. Women carried every man in her womb, raised every boy, taught hin whatevwr, formed or sha p ed him. The men who insult women are insecure or following a false tradition or persuadation. Complimmenting men by men is a reinforcement of believing he's superior, or somesuch bullshit, the most insulting to women if a man is believed worth more. Maybe I've complicated my answer, double standards are bullshit

[Maraneva]

I find catcalling to be pretty appalling. That being said, I don't even compliment people I'm not close with, meaning the only people who get my compliments are my best friends. I see no point in wasting energy and time to compliment someone who might get ticked off and cause a scene.

[Hannahm67]

I would say that complimenting someone is saying something nice about someone for the sole purpose of saying something nice. Now, this can lead to asking for someone's number but it can't be the reason you complimented them.

Catcalling is for the purpose of getting with someone, you don't even need to mean what you said.

[b5fan]

The problem most men have with this is...
A complement is creepy or nice really depends on whether you see us as 'good looking' or 'dirty men'.

If a homeless man said "hey i think you are very pretty, can i maybe have your number" on the street, how would you react?

If a 6 ft 2 quarterback said "hey i think you are very pretty, can i maybe have your number" on the street, how would you react?

It is not always easy to know how you would view us.

[Yaaten]

Exactly! Whether or not a comment directed at some random female is considered to be complimentary or creepy by her is entirely dependent upon how much she thinks you are worth in monetary terms, and/or how "attractive" you happen to be in her opinion. If she thinks you're ugly (or if you really are objectively ugly) you don't stand a chance, and will be accused of "harassment"!

[Sparda20xx]

Cat calling is sexual in nature. A compliments usually an innocent observation. The problem is, both can make a woman feel uncomfortable. So I say nothing. It's not worth losing my job or peace of mind by saying "hey your hair looks nice today."
It actually happened at my old job and the only reason the guy wasn't fired was other women who witnessed the event and came to his defense

[Yaaten]

That's crazy. Why would a person lose their job because they gave a compliment to a colleague? That makes precisely zero sense, on any level.

[wankiam]

just so you know, in the uk and several other european countries it has become a form of hate crime to catcall... great mytake by the way

[myTake Owner]

tysm

[Yaaten]

What defines a "catcall" though? How can something be considered to be a crime if there was no intent, no motive to commit one? There is a reason why, for example, manslaughter isn't as serious as murder.

[wankiam]

@Yaaten you seem to not know the difference between a compliment and a gang of lads hanging out of a car shouting 'get yer tits out'' to a 14 year old.

[Yaaten]

Well, yes, there's an obvious difference there, but what if the one giving the compliment just isn't very confident with women, is nervous, and just comes across as being "creepy" by the woman? What about those situations where the difference between a "catcall" and a compliment isn't very clear? In any case it shouldn't be a crime (literally a crime) to screw up a compliment and wind up looking like an idiot. Deliberate harassment is, again, something different. No one would condone stalking, for example. It's all very complicated, and that's a big part of the problem, the main reason why issues like this still arise.

[wankiam]

@Yaaten it should be very clear to everyone. there is no grey area on this. also if a woman claims she has been abused falsely then she may be the one breaking the law

[Wedimir]

the level of culture is different for everyone. it is culture that determines a person's behavior-their vocabulary, their compliments, and so on. to live with wolves is to howl like a wolf! what can you expect from obscenities other than? try to avoid such people

[xxxcali42]

Well to be honest depends on the kinda person your trying to attract.. guys who don't know how to properly speak to a woman or weren't taught how to by there mother's lol aren't ever going to really find a real relationship and wonder why all there women cheat or lie lol

[Yaaten]

"Giving a compliment is like, "Hey I think you are very pretty, can I maybe have your number?".
Catcalling is like yelling "Hey cutie! You're hot, gimme your number!'"

Could someone here explain the difference between the two, because I see none. In both instances a compliment is being given, with a request for a phone number.

[GirlyGal20]

second one is aggressive and intimidating

[Wise4myage]

Catcalling implies something sexual. If a compliment is G rated and not offensive, than that's the difference.

[myTake Owner]

Yes. Gotta agree with that

[Wise4myage]

Thanks.😊

[sensible27]

G rated wot?

[sensible27]

Depends on what you say. I personally am more pruvate but it seems like more of a preferance... There also seems like a difference between gender. It seems more accepted among women than men.

[bamesjond0069]

Another weirdo. 99.9% of girls take catcalling as as a compliment. I've literally yelled "hey sexy" out my car at a woman who proceeded to wave me down and get in to just cruise around with me. Or girls have been on a balcony and come down to talk to me.

The worst that typically happens is they say hi or thank you with a smile and keep walking.

Only maybe like 1% of the time do they look like a grouch or just ignore me.

You are one of a small amount of women who are just weird and if you can't handle social interactions stay home, problem solved.

[myTake Owner]

LMAO THAT IS SO NOT TRUE.

[Sylvanas_Windrunner]

Does making bird noises at a group of girls count as cat-calling? They responded back so it must of worked

[myTake Owner]

Not really catcalling. But it does make me feel uncomfortable tbh. That depends on the person.

[Sylvanas_Windrunner]

I only did it cause it was a group... just thought it would be funny

[Lucifer_666]

I've never done this and I don't understand how a grown man can do that. Much better just to approach the girl one on one and be sincere and respectful.

[Yaaten]

Easier said than done.

[OddBeMe]

Isn’t basic? If you’re talking to the woman it’s a compliment. If you’re shouting her down it’s catcalling.

[BazookaTrouper]

Men get targeted all the time by shady guys like the RSD (Real Social Dynamics) crowd if we're not complete horn dogs. I'd link an example but right now I'm only XP level 1.

[Sofie_8_6]

Cat calling is hooting and Hollering , complimenting is being nice and tone of voice.