She is somewhat inconsistent in the way she acts?

[Anonymous]

Here is my story ... Three years ago, I met a girl at my b ball court right when I wanted to take a break from the dating scene (yeah ... life is a bitch lol). Anyway, we hit it off really great and exchange numbers and e-mails.She had to go to a different city for a week but sent me pictures of her cause we both love drawing and made each others portraits. Most of the time when we hang out its strictly the two of us and we shared some secrets about our lives and dreams (the usual getting to know people better stuff) but since we are both really flirtatious to wonder if we were dating. I'm used to armless flirting and people talking so I didn't bother (wasn't looking for relationship at the time) but she seemed p*ssed. I told her to not pay attention to it since she said she wasn't dating anyone.

Later on I started realizing that I had deeper feelings for and asked her to date but I think I completely surprised her or came out too strong and she said no. I sucked up my pride and moved on (was moving in a different city anyway but we kept in touch). The thing is, I don't think its a good idea to stay close friends with someone you have feelings for and started to be a little more distant. That's when she started telling me that she misses me

and still answers my emails or phone calls very quickly. She introduced me to her parents and some of her close girl friends(never tried to hook me up with any of them).

We don't hang out as much now cause we both finished school and are looking for job security but still manage to go to movies once in a while or play a game of hoops. Why i get confused is that she is somewhat inconsistent in the way she acts:

- After I confessed to her, she invited me to a festival but almost ignored me all night long but danced with another guy friend. And as soon as started showing interest in another girl, she would find a way to talk to me.

- She would sometimes stare in my eyes while we talk about man-woman interactions (she does that a lot actually)

- Get physical when we play b ball one-on-one, which is surprising cz she is usually shy or be overly apologizing when she thinks she upset me.

- However she always seem to have a back up plan when we hang out and tends to talk a lot about guys she can't stand anymore or bother her. (As a friend, I listen but I don't try to fix all her problems).

- She uses the word nice a lot when talking about me, which wasn't a good sign at first but English is not her first language so she also uses it as cute or beautiful.

- She loves hugs so its hard to tell if she likes a guy better than the other just by looking and she hangs out a lot more with guys from the look of things so I don't know if I'm an exception (I'm not gonna spy on her after all lol)

- She always dresses up sexy when we don't go to play b ball and compliments me on my looks (yeah, I'm not bad looking but my looks is not everything about me ... lol)

Do you think she is playing me or its all in my head? Do I have a chance?

Updates

+1 y

I was expecting more help from the girls ... lol

[Anonymous]

Friends zone...You prob could pick it up if you get another girl in your life and completly ignore her. I would have ignored her when she told me no, Next time let the girl initiat dating or a relationship, next time just keep hanging out with her and tease her and touch her and flirt with her and try to kiss her, make it obvious by your actions that you are attracted to her, but don't ASK her to date, just do it and see if she catches on. it sounds like you guys were already dating. To test if you can still get it, tease her and flirt with her, if she flirts back than you prob are still attractive to her. Don't let her know that you want a relationship with her. It sounds like to me you aren't making any major moves on her and you are letting her take command, do not do that. At this stage she should be at your place watching a movie in the dark next to you with some popcorn (a scary movie) then initiate the make out session. it sounds like you two are close enough for that stage, why have you not taken it there?

[Asker]

Thanks for the input but, I already know for the friend zone and I don't really mind it since I'm dating other girls and she knows it. Thing is, she just shows more interest when I don't talk to her for over a month but shy away when I make a move. Btw, I didn't make a move earlier cz I thought she was dating another dude and found out later that he thought she was dating me lol.... I just want to know why she is acting like that

[Opinion Owner]

Oh well you know what you are doing, it seems like she is attracted but confused because you didn't make a major move, you know girls are like cats when it comes to attention, they come around you when you act like you don't notice them....I wouldn't have cared if she had another dude there or not.