He's not paying attention to me around his friends?

[Ficklespunk]

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4 months and from the beginning he hasn't been treating me like a girlfriend around his friends, maybe a friend or even an acquaintance sometimes. It leaves me feeling rejected and unworthy of his love by the end of the day/night whatever and I want more than that, like a hug, being able to hold his hand, just normal relationship things like that. I talked to him about it in the beginning of the relationship but I didn't really try to hard because I didn't want to be an annoyance to him, his excuse was that most of his friends don't have girlfriends and he doesn't want them to get jealous over the fact or feel like he's rubbing it in their faces. I understand that, I really do, but after 4 months we should at least be holding hands or something I mean they see us holding hands all the time in public just not when we are all hanging out.

Today I talked to someone who was dealing with the same thing, one of my boyfriends' friends girlfriend and she brought it up with me and I told her how my boyfriend was doing the same thing. Her and her boyfriend have been going out for like 3 years, is it just like this in the group of friends or maybe all guys are like this and you just have to get them used to noticing you even if their friends are there? I don't know, like he treats me normal when we are other places and he says I'm his world, but things like this make me question it. I guess 4 months doesn't seem like that long of a relationship but we have spent almost everyday together for like 8 hours a day...so it feels like we have been dating longer than we have. I don't know if that means anything.

[DoggyDude]

Young guys can have lots of silly ideas about how to behave around their guy friends. Some guys never grow up.

I would say, just treat him like you find him. If you want to hold his hand, hold his hand... if he objects ask him if he's your boyfriend or just a friend. If he says boyfriend, then act like its settled and hold hands.

It is curtious not to be overly affectionate infront of his single friends though. So that's reasonable. However, he should prioritise you to show he cares for you as least as a minor priority over his friends (excepting prehaps his best friend).

It might not mean anything except your boyfriend is immature. Though it might mean he's wanting to keep an image of being single in front of his friends. Just assert your right as girlfriend (but don't cross any lines).. just put your foot down on the holding hands whenever you like issue. That should always be fine.

[Ficklespunk]

But how do I ask him that without embarrassing him or something? Kind of wisper in his ear? What if he rejects it, like pools his hand away like the other day when I just grabbed his hand out of habit and he jerked it away...it just doesn't feel right and leaves me feeling rejected.

It that happens or he makes an issue of what I said, does that mean I should break up with him to show him its not okay and hope he grows up a little?

[DoggyDude]

You need to talk with him about it in your alone time together (when you next have that). Let him know that you understand where he's comes from (understand) but also really let him know your not feeling he's quite understanding back (and then explain how it can be hurtful to reject your hand). Remind him that your not asking for anything unreasonable just something small to let him know he's your guy and so you feel like his lady.

Its wrong for him to reject your hand.

[Robertinho]

Wow it seems like he cares more about his buddies than the girl that he likes. So his friends don't have girlfriends, so what, that's not his fault. It seems like he should be honor to have a girl like you, yet it almost seems as if he takes it for granted. Damn...some guys have all the luck, I tell you, well good luck ms, and take care.

[Ficklespunk]

I wish he would see that I guess...all I want is to hold hands or hug or anything and not just when we are alone. I have feeling like just a friend when his friends are around, its not fun.. :[

[Robertinho]

You should talk to him about it, and he has to understand I mean, look at what he's doing, its bugging you alright. Its all about communication in a relashionship no matter how soon or how old you have been around each other. With no communication and understanding one another, there's no such things as a relashionship, take care.

[Ficklespunk]

Its funny how that's exactly what I said to him a bit into our relationship when he was upset about something and now I'm not even following my own advice. Ehhh...I guess I just talk about it the next time we hang out together.

[Robertinho]

Alright then ms, good luck there.

[GirlFriday]

That's bad news. If a guy likes you he'll make sure you and the world know about it. If he won't treat you like his girlfriend in front of the guys then talk to him and tell him how you feel. If that doesn't work then let him go.