Is a girl’s kindness often mistaken for romantic interest to guys?

[TsundereMatrix]

There’s been guys that like me who I have no interest in that stop talking to me but eventually come back to talk after a few weeks, sometimes months thinking it will work this time around. No big deal to me I still talk to them as friends only. But when it’s a guy I like and he stops talking to me, I get confused. Then I realize how lousy I am at showing interest. I’m a very kind person and my girl friends have told me I act flirtatious when I’m not trying to be. So could these be correlated? Could I actually be confusing guys with my kindness and that causes them to stop talking to me for a while?

[Shadow44]

Yeah some guys do mistake kindness for niceness. I also know some girls a naturally flirtatious and guys may think she's interested when they don't know her well. The less kindness a guy gets from woman the more likely he is to think a woman likes him.

Like @winterfox10 said guys have a difficult time reading a woman's interest. This is more or less due to there not really being any universal signs. One girl's "I'm interested in you" signs is another girl's "I'm just being friendly signs".

Also there are times when a guy may just not know but is interested in you so he just takes a chance and asks. Though if you're sending out mixed signals unintentionally it may lead a guy to think that you're not interested which will make him move on (and in this case stop talking to you). So if you're interested in a guy just be straight forward about it.

[Robertinho]

It seems like your confusing every guy that might be interested in you or not. And even the one's that you have been interested in the past. Its pretty annoying when most girls do that... just be straight forward instead of confusing everyone... in general.

[Tania_bilkis]

I just don't know why the fuck people presume that! I have gone through the same shit where you are just being friendly but the guy thinks im showing interest.
What the fuck dude! Im treating you like a friend doesn't mean i want to be your girlfriend.
Bloody assholes!

[Anonymous]

I hope not... itd explain a lot though.

Not gonna lie if an attractive guy is nice to me I start to fall for him... most attractive guys are unkind towards me

[TsundereMatrix]

I’m always cautious because once I find myself getting attached, they are like “I just want to be friends.”

[Opinion Owner]

I try not too nowadays, saves me the disappointment. The thing that gets me every time is how they're kind and can talk to me as a friend while other guys treat me like I'm not even human!

[Thia18]

I’m like that too. Sometimes when I smile it comes of as flirting. Yes, it can be mistaken for romantic interest, but don’t change how you are!

[QueenofCups]

A lot of guys mistake kindness for romantic interest. I get hit on a lot for that reason.

[Luciferforyou]

Maybe you're giving out signs you don't wanna give out

[TsundereMatrix]

That’s what I mean. Being kind but they think it’s me being flirty.

[Luciferforyou]

Ask your friends about it because yes, guys do often misunderstand kindness for flirting BUT if you're girl - friends are telling you that you're flirting you've gotta ask them where you're going wrong

[jdoutworld]

Yeah, it could, maybe. On the other hand your friends may not know how you appear to different guys that don't know you well. Being nice and being flirty are two different things. It sounds to me like you aren't being flirty enough with the guys you like not that you are being flirty with guys you don't.

[JSmuve]

It can be. We often think that if a girl is being nice then she might like us. Then we learn that girls are just being polite and don't actually like us. Then we make the assumption that any girl that is being nice is just being polite and doesn't actually like us. So we pull the chute sooner than we should. When your "I'm interested" behavior and "just being nice" behavior are the same, it becomes unheartenlying difficult to figure out what you're really showing.

[imed007]

As a man i tell you there is no better feeling more then a girl tell him that he like him. If he dont have other on his own heart then he will be abel to listing to you and talking to you and go out with you. Just tell him about your feeling. And you dont have to do silly stuff to take his attention

[HeAintMe]

So here's whats up, ready?
The guys who are after you are desperate and undesirable, but the guys you're going after are out of your league, they don't give a fuck about you.

[Dinnye001]

It goes both ways. Me being helpful and nice is often mistaken for wanting something more. But it is just my personality to help those in need.

[TsundereMatrix]

The current guy I like is like that. He always wanted to help me, even if I didn’t ask for help. For the longest time I couldn’t tell if he was being nice or actually interested. Then his lady friend approached me and started talking him up like a wing man. I didn’t know her so it was definitely planned out and she even called me his girlfriend afterwards. I took that as a sign that he was not just being nice.

[Dinnye001]

Well, to be fair, those are mixed signals. I am always clear on intentions.

[TsundereMatrix]

Then again, my guy friends are helpful too but in a different way. I have to ask them for help and not like the other guy that just offered it to me.

[Dinnye001]

I think in this case there is clearly more. But I hace to admit I do not like this way of flirting.

[winterfox10]

In many cases, yes. You definitely need to be more intentional about showing our interest, guys have a really difficult time reading women.

[Robbyboys]

The thing is a lot of the time it's hard to tell when a woman is interested in me. Because I confuse kindness with romantic interest and vice versa. Some of my friends have a similar issue.

[Nahid1234]

Not to me, i can tell the difference between a girl interested and a girl that isn’t interested. Most it seems aren’t interested.

[king34]

Sometimes, but for me i don't really mistake it, im just attracted to girls who are nice and Freindly, and their more approachable

[haha_bob]

Sounds like you're confusing every guy that approaches you

[TsundereMatrix]

I probably do

[haha_bob]

This sort of thing happens all the time. That don't mean that you stop being who you are. You eventually find what you are looking for. Why not try on with someone who is interested in you. You never know , you might find what you're looking for

[Anonymous]

Sometimes. I usually assume they're not interested if they approach first or something because girls don't usually do that unless they don't find you attractive. They won't approach a guy who's attractive, for the most part.

[DrAntonio]

Yes, we get confused easily

[Omar5881]

With desperate dudes and dudes with not much experience, yeah

[sloank]

I relate to you so much. I'm a very outgoing person, and a lot of guys mistake that for flirting.

[weaverman]

It is confusing sometimes wen boys and girls chat on line

[tylander]

It could. But u just to be firm and very clearly I'm only will ever be your friend.

[Anonymous]

Yeah n the same for guys. Kindness is mistaken most of the time.

[Anonymous]

I think what's really happening is you're just not a forward person.

[Anonymous]

You cannot be that kind if you flirt with everyone. True kindness would be being straightforward and not dragging these men along i guess?