Guys and Girls... What are your thoughts on guys buying drinks at a bar for a girl they've never met or even seen before?

Question

winterfox10 · Accepted Answer

The woman's behavior is deceptive and she is playing him, if she doesn't tell him flat out from the get-go that she won't give him her number. See, this kinda shit is why men are so weary of women.

I think it's interesting how the majority of people said that she should feel free to accept the drinks, as long as the guy understands that there are no strings attached, but that's not how things work... Let me learn y'all something about bars: you don't buy drinks for people who you don't either want something from, or plan to approach, and you don't approach people you don't know at a bar without having some business besides talking to them (you might strike up a conversation while playing pool, for example). Why would I spend all night paying some chick's bartab if I wasn't trying to get laid? She's not going to tell me that I won't get her number, because she wants attention and free drinks. If I don't have her number by the end of the night; she played me, whether I was a willing participant or not.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

I think that when a guy offers to but a drink for a lady, she knows that he is expressing a sexual/romantic interest in her. When a lady accepts a first drink, a guy can reasonably interpret this as an expression of willingness to sit and talk further. By the time it gets to drink #2 or #3, the lady should know whether she has sufficient interest to gibe the guy her phone number. At that point, if she has no interest in him, continuing to accept his offers is a bit misleading.

Of course the lady is not obligated to give him a phone number at any time, but the decent thing to do would be to end the conversation and move on if she has no interest. Otherwise, she is using him.

Elliegirl · Accepted Answer

I say start with one drink if she wants to talk to him. If the convo is good and he offers another, it’s probably still okay. Just as long as you’re not bankrupting the guy with your orders or getting hammered on his dime with no intent of ever talking to him again, I think it’s fine to continue to accept within reason. If there’s no interest or not worth continuing, thank him for the offer but decline. Also, just because you talk to a guy and accept a drink, or even a few, from him, it doesn’t mean you have to fuck him. He may be looking to get laid or he may not, but if he thinks buying a girl a drink makes her obligated to drop her panties for him, then he’s a douche.

AuroraRoseat · Accepted Answer

I chose the last. I'll take a single drink and talk to the guy, but if I'm not interested, I wouldn't get anymore.

If a guy is trying to get me liquored up, I'd be suspicious.

If he sees me going to the bar for shots--which I am prone to do--and simply wants to spend his money, I wouldn't do it. I'm not into him so I wouldn't spend his money that way.

Logorithim · Answer

Buying a drink for a girl is a time-tested way of getting her attention, so a guy should do it, but not expecting anything.

If the girl knows she is not interested in him, she shoudl decline any further drinks unless she really likes the conversation. Why waste time with a guy you're not interested in.

Cosytoasty · Answer

I voted C...

Honestly it’s so overblown how much of an apparent “burden” it is for the guy to buy drinks. It’s like 5 drinks each for an entire evening... it’s not like you’re both doing 30 shots one after another.

FWIW I have NEVER chatted with a girl who hasn’t bought at least a couple of return rounds... despite me offering to get everything. I see it as socialising, I’ve met friends at bars after I found out we have a common work interest. That doesn’t mean it always has to lead to anything romantic or sexual.

dantetheexplorer · Answer

I don't go to bars so I never buy women drinks. The bar is one of the last places I would want to meet women.

Having said that, I voted for it being okay if the woman accepts drinks all night with no strings attached. No one's signing a contract. Would you sell your home without signing a contract? Same here. If the man is desperate enough to ply a woman for drinks in exchange for sex, he is essentially gambling, because there's a chance she'll say no, and the woman is completely in her right to say No. Buying someone drinks doesn't entitle you to anything. So, if the man wants to gamble, he should go in knowing that there's a chance his bet isn't going to pay off. Don't want to throw money away? Don't gamble.

RegularTK421 · Answer

I voted A. If a girl has no intention of giving the man her number and giving him a chance, she is just taking advantage of his interest in her. A man shouldn't be stupid enough to buy a girl drinks all night in a bar. You end up paying for her bar tab and getting nothing in return. It used to be kind of an unspoken code that if a woman accepted a drink, you kind of had a chance. Now these girls just play along cause they are broke and use men who express interest in them to get drunk for free. Then when the men realize they got played, they can't handle it and start attacking all women verbally or become bitter. Don't try to get her drunk, and ladies dont accept drinks and send mixed signals. People just need to be honest and upfront thats all.

AllThatSweetJazz · Answer

If there's no intention of going any further then I think it's pretty shitty to keep mooching drinks. If you're enjoying the conversation then buy your own drinks and show you're staying for the conversation and not for the drinks. You don't owe him a number if you weren't giving it anyway, but you owe him the kindness of not leeching drinks. He's allowed to do that in spite of the situation if he wants, but that doesn't make it right or good, just as you are allowed to self-harm or drink yourself into a drunken stupor in all your free time but I don't think it's good for you nor recommend it.

Philyouup · Answer

I think, if they are already talking and enjoying the company of each other, offering to buy her a drink is fine. If he does it with the intention of getting "in her pants" it's his money he's losing. I think a woman talking to a guy that offers her a drink, knows if he's "fishing" for some fannie or if its a genuine offer of "friendship or courtesy" To offer a drink out of the blue, I'm not so sure one way or the other. It could be just an ice breaker to get a chance to talk to somebody that catches your eye. For a guy to expect that there will be any reciprocation other than conversation or drink in return would be a bit backward and caveman like.

Evo38 · Answer

I feel she should tell him that she is not interested from the start. If he still is willing to buy then it's all on him. Personally I've always just bought them a drink and then turned and walked away without saying a word. It keeps them wondering and the looks are priceless sometimes.

Finchie40 · Answer

If he buys her 1 drink and she knows she isn't interested in him she should tell him thank you for the drink and make up a lie or whatever that she is already taken. It would be the appropriate thing to do to make him aware that he doesn't have a chance

Ouroboros8Fate · Answer

I mean it depends on the guy. Some guys buy drinks for girls simply because they want to get to know you over a drink and that is essentially the start of the icebreaker. Some guys think that they are entitled to your attention once they buy a drink. But normally if it's a nice guy it's just a friendly gesture of them showing interest in you and wanting to get to know you.

SarahsSummer · Answer

If a guy offers me a drink AND I’m interested in talking to him, sure. At some point the girl needs to decide a couple things tho do I want to keep talking to this guy and have I had enough/too much to drink?

Sociopathvictim · Answer

i bought a drink for a girl just so i could kiss her with tongues because she had a tongue ring. But the alcohol wasn't enough to clean her mouth out, i got an ulcer the next morning :[ damn.
Anyway the point of buying a girl a drink is to bribe her into some kind of sexual favour. I think men make great police officers because we can tell how sober a girl is ;) HEYYYYYYYYY THIS ONE NEEDS A DRINK OVER HERE omnomnomonomnom

HereIbe · Answer

He's free to buy. She's free to drink. There is no obligation placed upon her that is not explicitly stated. What he is "buying" from her is her time AT THE BAR, nothing more. Anything more than that is her freebee to bestow or not, at her will. Thus, if his Game isn't up to getting some Happy Fun Bed Jumpy Bump Time as the freebee, then he needs to up that GAME!

passinby · Answer

How about if I buy her a glass of milk? Would that be less rapey?

Prankster13 · Answer

Option C. Although I would say. If she already knows she's not giving him her number? That's kind of leading him on to keep accepting drinks feom him... I mean there's nothing wrong with that. But still. At least warn him maybe?

Andrea89 · Answer

It would be considerate of her to only accept the drinks if she's up for at least blowing him in return. If a guy buys a random girl drinks, it's because he's looking to get his dick wet

Benedek38 · Answer

If she has no intention of making anything of the conversation, then she clearly is using the guy, and should refuse the drink, or at least refuse the second drink.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I think guys should offer a girl. Does she want him to buy her a drink? And if she says No Thanks than he should take it that she says No Thanks !!! He shouldn't push the issue on buying her a drink.

clarinet89 · Answer

A girl I know, once posted a tweet saying "guys, if you are thinking about sending a drink over to a girl you like, send wings instead"

Now, granted I think she's more of a wing eater, than a drinker but, I wonder if she really meant, ALL women?

IndieGirlJess · Answer

I think he is trying to get her drunk so he can get her in bed.

maddithebaddi · Answer

If I'm not interested in him I'm not letting him buy me a drink. if I keep accepting things from him he will assume I'm interested

Wowgirl10q · Answer

Scary

burlen · Answer

I never buy drinks to girls I’m about to hit. I wish if only guys would stop that "cheesy" practice.

dolemite68 · Answer

I think it’s foolish to by girls drinks period. If she digs u she’ll hook up with u for free.

BronzedAdonis · Answer

sycophantic, transparent, never done it and never will.  I agree with @dolemite68

larry69 · Answer

Women should never pay for a man's drink. If a man is around and wants to conversate then he should pay and make sure she don't drink too excessively

CT_CD · Answer

If she drinks on his tab all night, she owes him her number if he asks for it

name_is_eric · Answer

That's like the oldest trick in the book. A classy gesture.

Steve37 · Answer

It's an icebreaker that shows his interest in her. What's the issue?

JellyDonutguy96 · Answer

if she buys me a drink  then I'd be like  are you feeling alright hun?

PrettyRegular · Answer

Waste of money but if someone offers you a free drink, why not?

TheRealQuestion · Answer

If he wants to buy and she wants to drink then nobody should expect more.

BillieJean1070 · Answer

Face it, he's looking to get laid.

Penelope_ · Answer

I think it’s fun

catgirl42 · Answer

Its spiked

laughinglad999 · Answer

he is a daft guy

Guys and Girls... What are your thoughts on guys buying drinks at a bar for a girl they've never met or even seen before?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Guys and Girls... What are your thoughts on guys buying drinks at a bar for a girl they've never met or even seen before?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.