Why would you dump someone who is out of your league?

[Anonymous]

so my ex dumped me two months ago... it's kind of ironic because he tried for two solid years to get me, and once he got me, after a few months he decided to get back together with an ex of his.

it's more ironic because I was out of his league (this is according to my friends who were surprised that I was with him). he's on the pudgy side, whereas I play a lot of sports so my body is pretty good. he almost failed a class whereas I get straight A's. he's not all that rich but I am. I thank god for all these things, I don't brag about them or think that I'm better than he is because of these things, but from the beginning, we both knew that I was out of his league.

so if you're dating someone out of your league... why would you dump them? he dumped me (according to him) because he didn't have a chance of marrying me. I think it was more because I wasn't satisfying all of his sexual needs (i'm still virgin).

the relationship was great while it lasted... so why did he dump me? I still think about him everyday but he told me not to contact him until he contacts me first :/

[TurbulentDan12]

Even if you are "out of his league" as far as attractiveness goes that's not the only thing that matters in a relationship. If you weren't having sex with him and he wasn't having a good time around you, he probably didn't see any reason to stay with you. Maybe it just was the no sex, but you have to remember that looks and sex are not the only things that guys care about even though that is how it seems.

[Asker]

alright I can understand that, but why would he not want to talk to me again? it's been two months of no contact, and before we dated we were best friends. :/

[TurbulentDan12]

Guys can be immature especially at your age. Was it a harsh break up? Maybe he's not over being upset about breaking up. Maybe he doesn't want you to think he's still interested.

[Asker]

what happened was his ex who he hadn't been talking to for a while because she cheated on him started contacting him again and begging for him back. I mean, I guess he still had feelings for her because the next day he changed his relationship status. and then we had a huge argument and then stopped talking. :/

the thing is she cheated on him, and she has so many problems (alcohol abuse, sexual identity confusion, drama queen moments etc.) that it didn't and doesn't make sense to me.

[G_GTom]

Maybe once he got you, you weren't was he was expecting. You may not brag about all the things you have, but you use them to put them perspective and, quite honestly, it sounds as if you have a condescending attitude towards him. Heck, I wouldn't want to be a with a woman the way you feel about him.

[Asker]

how do you know how I feel about him? you should know that I that I loved him and I still do; I never mentioned/ made a big deal out of these differences. just because we were born in different situations doesn't mean one of us is better to the other. I was attracted to him because of his really gentle, kind personality and I think that he was attracted to me for the same reason. so, I really hope he didn't see me as condescending. because in no way did I think that way.

[G_GTom]

If someone I was dating thought of me as "out of their league", that's all I need to know. You can say anything you want after that, but it won't matter. That's just my opinion and other people may feel differently.

[Anonymous]

Wow, he sounds like a winner. There are a lot of tools in high school and not all of them come in the "hottie with a body" package. That's a stereotype. A lot of nerds, fat guys, emo kids, etc ... all can be jerks who treat girls crappy.

[Asker]

yeah... the best tool is perhaps the one who pretends to be the "nice guy". from the outside, he's a nice guy, but the way he dumped me (making his new girlfriend text me the news) and stuff shows that he's a tool in a very clever disguise :/

[Prof_Don]

How did this answer get a thumb-down? She's telling the truth.

[Anonymous]

People don't usually dump others because they are out of their league. Usually people go for others out of their league, & get shot down.

[J_White90]

Well if the person is just THAT much better than me in every way (richer, smarter, more attractive) like you say you are to your ex, then I personally would not really want to be reminded of those facts every day. And that is just what would happen if I were in a relationship with her. But that's just me...

[jnesss68]

"(i'm still a virgin)" you answered your own question.

[SnackG]

If it's someone who thinks they're better than mean I might as well.

[Shaun]

Word

[SnackG]

me*

[Asker]

but I don't think I'm better than him. I think he's a lot kinder, compassionate, empathetic, selfless, and in general a better person than I am. so I don't think I'm better, not at all.

[SnackG]

Oh. You made it sound like you're awesome and hot and he's just whatever. Then no I wouldn't. If he went back to his ex and nothing is wrong with you then he's just dumb. You're young at least. Don't worry about it.

[theseeker100]

yes if he cheats on me or does anything to hurt me.

[Shaun]

He enjoyed the company of his ex to your company.