Apart from looks being the obvious one what are some other characteristics or things which make someone out of your league?


I took a girl like that out a few times after knowing her for a while. I had met her online and we ended up doing some writing and research together for months before we ever even spoke on the phone, and we eventually met and spent some time together.
I knew she came from a wealthy family, but I didn't know for months that she came from a WEALTHY family - as in, her family owned several European banks that had been in the family for more than 250 years. We're talking OLD money.
As a lower-middle-class guy, it became clear that, while SHE probably would have been okay with it, her family never would have accepted me and would have caused problems for her. Plus, by then I had had experience dating non-American women who had to be out of the country for months/years at a time. I suspect she'd have had ways around that, but I broke it off before it got very serious. There's just no way I could have lived her lifestyle, and even though she never made a big deal about it at all (you'd know by meeting her that she was well-educated, but you'd have no idea about her financial situation), she was used to traveling the world and not being limited. I could barely afford my starter home at the time and a trip to Vegas (from California) would have required saving up for a couple of months. I would have either held her back or had to have her pay for everything, and neither would have been okay with me (and would have confirmed her family's worst fears).
While I think a lot of people DO make "leagues" a bigger deal than they are, they DO exist, and large differences are almost impossible to deal with.
Great story
The qualities are not stable in respect to time, some qualities are now important for someone to have conventional beauty, but they were not in the past and others may replace them in the future. Anyway, you find the sum of all the attributes that make you conventionally beautiful (SB) and the sum of your conventional flaws (SF), then find your conventional beauty (CB), by taking the difference SB-SF. Proceed, by using the same methodology for the potential partner. Now to find the league case (LC), take the difference CB (a)-CB (b), where CB (a) is for you and CB (b) is for your potential partner. If LC>0 then your potential partner plays in a lower league than yours. If LC=0 you are equals (the best case). If LC<0 then your potential partner is out of your league, or in other words you are screwed..! Ta Daaa !
Cause we live in a society that promotes impossible beauty standards ONLY we think they are possible. And after a while, it's all we see.
Do you have any idea how many times I've gotten :"Wow, you could do so much better" in relation to my husband?
Just cause he's not the most attractive man in the world to them, doesn't mean that he can't be one to me.
It doesn't even matter that he is smart, kind, funny, hard working, loving, that he cared for me when my parents hurt me the most, that he is an amazing father to our baby.
It all boils down to "You are hotter and prettier than him"
And as far as I'm concerned, there are no leagues cause you're basing this strictly on looks.
Beauty will fade, you won't be young and pretty forever.
But what I have with my husband, who they think isn't worthy of me, that? That's not going anywhere.
If only society could have this mindset. How different it would be. I can't begin to imagine.
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@WhiteHelmet99 I guess your right. It's interesting how "easily" people are willing to give in to societal pressures just to be seen as "successful" in terms of managing to secure a very physically attractive SO.
Unfortunately, @sarahhouse, for every woman (and man but society likes to emphasis women's tastes more I feel) that doesn't think looks are the be-all end-all, there are more who do think it's the be-all end-all.
I think people are usually attracted to familiarity and looksmatch is a part of it. Since I believe you are a conventionally attractive women, it's not unlikely others will feel the same as well. This means more people would be willing to believe that you "should rightfully" want to be with your looksmatch.
Not saying it's right that people think that way. In fact, I am always happy to see a happy couple and never think he or she "deserves better because they are better looking that their SO".
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It's just unfortunate that others do not feel the same way as I do.
Very well put!
Nothing because I don't put people in leagues, it's complicated and it doesn't do anything to make anyone feel good. If I like someone, I put myself out there regardless of how attractive or smart they might seem because I don't know them yet so I can't really judge them. Things might work out or a guy might ignore me or say they aren't interested but because I don't know them yet, I'm not invested in them so their opinion of me doesn't matter
Good girl! i like the way you think.
I'm intimidated by guys i'd consider out of my league but i know i should probably just realize there opinion means nothing in reality.
Thank you. The only opinion of you that matters is yours. So as long as you're happy and comfortable with yourself, it's all good. Besides, these guys that you might be going up to and trying to talk to, they don't know you at all yet so they don't understand what they're passing up
I'm old enough to realize no one is out of my league. I am older now and my body isn't great. So I thought a young good looking guy or even an older good looking guy was out of my league. But they aren't. I've dated some really good looking and younger guys in the past until I snagged my current sexy af guy that is absolutely in love with me despite all my flaws. So don't let your flaws stop you from trying.
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They are famous
They are very rich
They are very handsome
They are very outgoing and confident and dominant
If they are really attractive and get a lot of attention from others
Any sane person is apparently out of my league.
Reading women is easy. If a women likes you she will in no order,... Square her body with yours, she will play wil her hair, laugh at what ever you say, she will touch you, her pupils will be big mean she likes what she see, so she will take you all in, her eyes may look sharp meaning the flirt eyes, may be shy, or soft spoken. The number one bomb a women will do if she likes you is drop something turn around to pick it up so you can see her butt.
Lol whats that got to do with leagues?
Everything baby. The more ready, and player skill a man has he can play in any league.
Simply if they are doin great things in their life or simply movin fast into a well functionin adulthood.. Like I felt that my unofficial girlfriend was outta my league cause I'm at a sort of stand still in my life, and she comes from an upper class family, and she already got a guaranteed job when she get outta college..
Mostly I was intimidated by people who seemed to have their lives together -- people with goals who were working effectively to reach them, fashionably dressed, well groomed, like that line in a song "You're where you should be all the time". Later in life I learned that many people who appear totally secure and in control of their lives, enjoying a successful career, may also have crushing insecurities. So I'm not so intimidated anymore.
it´s as simple as that: if the person is smarter, more successful and better looking than you, you are probably done for unless she is willing to settle for someone far inferior to her/him, and let´s be honest only a minority is willing to put up with that nowadays
I was in college, and got approached by the girl I had a crush on. It totally depends on what you mean by approached - for me it was - she came (out of her way), said hi, wished me luck for my results later that day-I replied with a blush and so on- but I had (/have) such low self esteem, that I always thought, what will the other guys & girls of the class think if we (me and her) were going out together.
Obviously, nothing happened in those 4 years, she must have forgotten me as well (although she occasionally likes some of my instagram pics still)
Usually when theyre super active. Its one thing to be cute and not so sporty in my mind I can see that sort of person possibly liking me but when they are super into working out and what not it feels like they probably wouldn't touch me with a ten foot pole anyway
Realistically i rate myself around a 4, slightly below the median average for attractiveness. If she's above a 6 I'd say she's out of my league. Aside from looks, I'd say if she talks to successful guys or already has other people interested she's probably out of my league just based on the premise that she has options and I don't.
I know guys have told me I was out of their league because I didn’t like to smoke/drink every night like they did. They just hadn't come across a friend that was like that. And I also had morals that didn’t align with theirs but made them even more interested in me.
I don't necessarily believe in "leagues" but I do definitely get turned off if they look like family material.
There are way too many women in my age bracket who are looking like they'd love to get married ideally the next year because their clock is already ticking.
I don't believe I would be compatible with that kind of women.
Isn't it funny how 111 guys think you're talking about them and only 16 girls think that. Hmmm... but here's the only answer you'll need...
For women... It depends on how Young, Fit and Attractive you are. The younger (keep it legal people) and the more attractive you are the higher you league. If you're 25 and HOT... no man is out of our league.
For guys it depends on how Rich, Powerful, or Famous you are. You're looks have very little to do with this. He doesn't need all three but definitely needs at least one. The more of one, or a combo of them the higher his league.
Personality, Humor, etc.. these are nice to haves... but not deal breakers. Women do tend to use theses and others as "signs" of wealth, power and fame. For example... women love a guy who's confident... of course they do. Unknown poor guys with no power have 0 confidence. If a guy is confident., we usually has something to be confident about.
I can easily tell, not assume, by how they act, carry themselves, what kind of friends they have, or the people they associate with, and what direction they are going in life. Looks have 0 to do with it. Unless it is how they chose to dress.
If someone THINKS they are out of my league, hey that's a self fulfilling prophecy. I wouldn't have anything to do with someone who conducts themselves and their lives according to what 'league' they have been assigned!!!
Intelligence, and presence. Not like Regina George full of herself but like if she's very smart and graceful I feel inferior. I work fairly hard for my education and brain so intelligence matters a lot to me as well as how a person carries themselves.
This "out of my league" crap is idiotic. People dosen't only chose partners who are just as perfect as them. This also goes the other way around. People chose partners depending on their qualeties, and people have a lot of different opinions when it comes to which of these qualeties are the best. We bassicly value some qualeties over others. So if you have a small ammount of qualeties, but the qualeties you hold are valued by someone else you might have a chance.
Someone from money, or pelf. Of wealth... i am not proper all the time, not out of my league, she would be out of my league... i don't choose to play phony for anyone, so i guess in that situation it would apply.
It's just my crappy self esteem that pops up in d back of my brain whenever I start crushing on a guy n whisper shouts "whatever the freaking hell r u wishing for!!! He's so far beyond ur league. Just slip out of his line of sight before u embarrass urself"
1) Way too intelligent
2) Way too outgoing
3) Way too social and extroverted
Has a lot of friends both girls and guys
4) Really artistic and values art in a way that makes me feel I know nth about it
I just can't ever imagine this type of guys to notice or be interested in a potato like me 😂
It used to be I thought anyone I was attracted to was out of my league. Now I don’t believe anyone is out of my league. Just some girls might take a bit more work to get than others lol. Maybe that’s silly with way too high hopes but that’s just how I feel these days.
Leauges are not assumption but reality. Leauges r the wrong word in the first place. It's a combination of person's priorities he/she wants to see in their partner. There could be hundreds of priorities depending on each individual. There r 9 billion people on Earth. And not everybody wants the same. It can't be a general question. Looks, Money/Job and status are 3 fundamental criteria influenced by social structures one lives in. Rest are all personal choices and very hard to define
If some of these actions lead me to believe that they are out of my league it's actually the actions of somebody who is narcissistic or generally thinks that they are superior so I would consider those individuals out of my league only because it's a league that I don't want to have anything to do with
Nothing other than let's say a girl who is older than me, and holds a professional degree such as a doctorate. That's about it.
I don't really like to rate women by looks because something I have noticed is that women who are above average looking tend to not much else going for them (there are exceptions of course)
I think it would probably have to be if she was very wealthy, though I'm surprised how much wealthy women feel small or lesser when you start having an intellectual conversation with them and they say stuff like, "I wish I was that smart," or "I wish I knew things like that." Kinda makes you feel awkward.
For me sometimes you just get a vibe/feeling like they don’t even notice you/ want nothing to do with you. They never make eye contact or look at you. They almost seem foreign even if u are in the same room
I suppose if I hit my head on something really hard and it affected my thinking, I might assume someone was out of my league. It's not something I'd normally do, though.
Being out of her league is all about attitude. If she acts superior to others, especially me, then yeah, she has put herself in another league, one that I would rather not be in anyways.
When I was younger I asnt exactly the most attractive, but as there year shabe gone by thst has changed. I use to think looks would make someone iyt of my league, but I no longer feel that way. But now I feel like s certain financial status could make someone out of my league. I'd imagine I'll ve making quite a decent amount if money post-college/later down the line. But there will always be someone making more money than you.
Perceptions of value and standards are extremely subjective despite the basic equality of human variability. That said, I only really consider someone inaccessible if she has an admirable, acquired skills or traits that I couldn't ever match, like Venus Williams in tennis or Maura Healey with law.
I don't ever think that anymore when it comes to women. I've talked to women who were 9s and 10s.
Besides their looks, they aren't all that special.
So true. People get caught up in looks too much. Which I do to since I love pretty women. But The pretty chick poop stinks just like the average and not so good looking chick.
How well they dress, the nice things they have, the fact that they are standoffish, much more mature, very academic,
... Should I keep going? Lol.
They have a really nice car. And a fancy last name. And eat at restaurants where the food is served fancily on a regular basis. Looks wise, nothing much, I'm more into regular guys than really hot ones.
@Twinrova well yes but not that you're above their league.
@Twinrova why make a good car stink?
@Twinrova well then don't eat from trash.
It's partly about looks but I'd say social status is behind the presumption you're out of someone's league. For example, a hardcore WoW player would assume a socialite won't be interested because of stereotypes from both sides and probably the former's rejection by the latter.
If they are extremely pretty & or good looking that would be a factor, also if i felt i wouldn't be able to apporach that person, i would generaly aay they are out of my league. Personaly i like naturaly beautiful girls but i do still find other girls who are out of my leage to be attractive too.
Apart from physical attraction being the obvious factor, I'd say it's how outgoing and confident they appear to be. Because it kind of screams "I know I'm hot and I know what my options are, and you're at the bottom of my list."
If they look very attractive. I don't like really attractive guys anyway. 🙅 I am afraid they will leave me for hot girl. Average looking guys are the best :)
Usually when they are platinum division or higher. I'm like only Gold III but one day I'll be challenjour.
Never thought that about a guy. When I am low I think I am pretty average, but I'm probably better than average.
If we are not considering looks, I suppose their influence. How people regard someone can be intimidating at times.
Nothing aside from high age difference and/or her already having a relationship. There are no real leages, it just feels like there are. It's really just opportunities.
(That is WAY too much makeup, by the way. lol)
I don't ever say a girl is out of my league, instead I tell myself they would be lucky to be with me. I just say to myself, that's not a girl I would want to be with if she's "out of my league" what a stupid phrase anyways. I've walked up to girls who were super hot, then I realized she couldn't hardly speak English or had such a heavy accent that I couldn't understand her, so I just politely excuse myself and say it was nice to meet her.
I have never thought a woman its out of my league, however the one who is out of my league its my own self. See, the way I see it, if Im unhappy with myself then I dont think Im good for anyone.
I have to be happy with myself and thats what truly matters.
I am a non believer in leagues - You never know unless you try, if you feel a connection with someone, explore it and see where it goes, regardless.
She's in the Justice League.
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How confident they are. I think that is the most predominant besides looks.
It doesn't have to be qualities. It can be when someone just gives off that cold exterior, which makes them look unapproachable
I tend to do that. Unintentionally
If they're really hot and very confident (if they're always posting beach pics and shopping trip posts then I assume they're out of my league.)
Also if they have lots of friends.
I'm pretty confident about myself but there are some characteristics of my personality that I do lack I'm kind of intimidated by female because I normally fumble trying to talk to them and then I try to recover by acting Macho the normally end up embarrassing myself so I just mainly keep to myself but to answer your question female that's got her stuff together composed independent secure that's what she wants has her own and knows that she is the shit
I kinda believe in a different league than others. I don't like approaching another girl but, being approached by her. So, it is her who should think whether she is in my league or not. For those who think I'm out of their league aren't worth my time in the first place and, probably not good enough for my standards.😎
Any girl over a 5 is out of my league, so I don't bother with them.
Oh and the 3's dressed up as a 9 ain't worth the time
It's mostly looks especially if the guy is really built. I'd also be intimidated if he was super successful in business.
All their previous partners are much more attractive than me.
They make a lot more money thank I do and have a totally different different lifestyle.
They have a lot more relationship/sexual experience than I do.
When a guy has a large social circle and is incredibly good-looking.
If they don't enjoy how my mind thinks and don't adore how my body moves and don't know how to handle it then they r not just out of my lead but out of my entire planet and they should go orbit other planets bc they will certainly bore me
Never thought anyone was out of my league. But I would say when a guy has a better education and job than me. Also when he has a lot of money. Might sound conceited but I've never met any guys better looking than me although I have met girls who are.
Are you sure that you actually compare yourself with guys when you've never met ANYBODY in your whole live of whom you thought he's out of your league?
@Meerjungfraumann yes, ill rephrase what i said. So to be more specific i haven't met any guys out of my league in terms of physical facial features. However i have met dudes with better bodies and better height including a better education plus a job that gets them a lot of money. I just never found a guy with a face as cute as mine but I've met girls with cuter facial features than me.
@Meerjungfraumann there might be a super cute guy out there who is 100% out of my league but i dont know where he is because i have not met him yet.
Confidence of self is the only reason I would at least give it a honest try but some people don’t have what it takes get it done ✅
If everything she's wearing and the way she looks is expensive she's out of my league.
I don't like things that require too much maintenance.
Strength I thinking a beautiful strong woman who still has a sense of humor that's what takes her out of my league because she would be perfect
Honestly none. I don't think that way. If anything I consider them out my league if I see a trait in them that stinks.
I know what I bring to the table as a man and overall as a person.
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