Seriously, why aren't any guys paying any attention to me?!

[Anonymous]

I'm so confused why guys don't talk to me. And I'm also getting really frustrated by it! Putting all modesty aside, I have beautiful red, straight hair with pretty green/blue eyes and no freckles. I also have big boobs and I'm not fat. I don't cake on the makeup, I usually keep it natural looking. I'm definitely not ugly and I don't dress slutty/trashy. And people usually think I'm pretty funny, I might just be a little shy in the beginning, especially around guys. But my shyness is almost a direct result of guys not talking to me/showing absolutely no interest. Please help! I'm 20 years old-- I feel like this is a prime time for guys to be talking to me! What should I do?!

[kholland65]

Most guys today don't just walk up and talk to random girls. For one its because we get criticized for doing so. We get called things like creeper, pervert, etc. so unless he's a master pick up artist and or looks like brad pit, most guys just shy away from it and look to more natural means of meeting people that are generally more effective.

That being said, one thing that I can guess is wrong with you, based on what I've read here, is that you try to hard for male attention. I know me and my guy friends actually disdain girls who seem to go out of their way to make sure the guys in the room are noticing them. It looks like you have no self respect, like you have self-esteem issues, and quite frankly its just funny watching a girl roll around like a puppy dog hopping you'll pet her tummy (figuratively of course).With out much to go on, that would be my guess. Your trying to hard for attention as opposed to let it come naturally to you when you actually deserve the attention.

Shyness can also be a killer, and the reason I say this is because I've recently started to notice the types of girls who get guys easily. I personally prefer the quieter, shyer type girls, however, for some reasons I rarely end up with them. The reason being is that many times they're so closed off socially that you just don't get the chance to get to know them. Going back to my first paragraph, if the girl is open and social, its more likely I'm going to end up talking with her, hanging out with her, and therefor entertaining the idea of asking this girl out. If you don't put yourself out there and be social and talk with guys, they have no idea if they are going to like you. Looks are big, but its still not enough if that is all a guy has to go on, because again, only a select few guys will approach a girl out of the blue just because she looked pretty from across the room. All I know is, I see so many girls who aren't even all that super attractive, having 5 guys at a time wanting to date them all because she is super outgoing and borderline flirts with guys. I don't suggest you be a serial flirter, but again, socializing and being open to a guy is going to make him like you. You have to remember that guys are not these mindless pigs that society makes us out to be. What really draws us to a girl is when we feel we can get along with her really well. Like she could be our best friend, because this is a rare quality to find in a girl. Obviously we make better friends with guys. I guess what I'm saying is you need to learn to almost be able to make friends with new guys you meet, but at the same time, if you are interested in a particular guy, not be afraid to be a bit flirtatious to let him know that you want more than to be just friends with him.

[Asker]

Definitely a good answer, thanks. But don't be so quick to judge how hard I fight for male attention and my level of self esteem based off of a paragraph I wrote in one minute. I actually don't fight for guys' attention that hard at all and I have decent self-esteem. I've just recently noticed that guys aren't really paying that much attention to me, like at parties and stuff, and it upsets me. but thanks for the answer!

[tswayd]

I would agree with the part especially about how a lot of men find rejection very painful and altogether shy away from approaching women.

[sweetsteel15]

Dude, you basically hit 10 birds with one stone right there! (Metaphorically)

[funkadelic5]

Men are human beings too. Why don't you approach men that you find attractive? Same reason they don't approach you. There's no always an easy way to approach someone. They might see you in class and think "Hey, she's really cute" and be stealing glances at you the whole time - but unless they have some opportunity in class to work/talk with you, then their only opportunity to approach is probably after class. That can be awkward/creepy and it's hard to just do a cold approach and tell her that you're interested from the get-go.

Bottom line, approaching the opposite gender takes balls. Figuratively.

[DishLady]

DON'T SWEAT IT. When I was very young someone told me "Guys are like buses. If you miss one, another will come right along." But really what most girls are looking for is not a bus... A Limo, a jet, a glitzy motorcycle. Those catch your eye, but the bus? Sigh. How dull, right?

A friend of mine just told me that it's physically impossible for a girl NOT to get looked at, no matter what her physical attributes. You're just not catching the guys who are looking at you. You're on Main Street (cute, female, 20, college, etc.), you're probably on the route and near a bus stop, but not aware of it.

Warning: While it's great once you get your bus, be sure the driver's not taking you for a ride towards a dead end.

You're lovely. Don't be so anxious and don't sell yourself short. Good luck, Missy.

[dalila]

great answer yeah buses are everywhere we just want a limo, a jeep or a cool scooter lol

probably guys think you are way too much for them and taken

[DishLady]

Wear a helmet with your scooter, lol.

[suzyy]

maybe you are too attractive for guys to approach you? I heard that it can be quite intimidating..

why don't you approach a guy first?

[jjackflash]

What do you mean by "paying any attention", don't you get glances sometimes? Maybe you are so pretty and guys are getting arrogant vibes from you. Idk, I would have to see how you look to tell you what's wrong.

[Hades]

Do you pay attention to guys?

Tell me you don't just sit there expecting the guy to come over and sweep you off your feet. Entitlement complexes really are a turn off.

[Anonymous]

my guess is that they think because of your beautiful body that you are already taken so why not switch gender roles and ask a guy out instead of waiting

[tswayd]

Perhaps men at that age are shy and not fast to approaching girls? I know I am a little and I am 22

[Anonymous]

I would be scared of you

[sweetsteel15]

lmao

[Opinion Owner]

Why lmao