My boyfriend doesn't let me to wear mini skirt, strapless, sexy clothes, why?

[Samsunlu055]

I really like wearing mini skirt and strapless, besides I love showing my brassiere hangs during strapless clothes :) but when I meet with my boyfriend, I want to smart up and prinkle myself, use lipsticks and colorful lacquers for him and I aslo wear nice sexy dresses :) I sometimes wear light and transparent clothes finally I wear black bra with them. But when he look me when I am prunkle and smarte up he sudden gets angry and shout at me why I wear them, perhaps does he afraid of another's staring? However we are living in coastal city and we are comfortable and sexy with all people of city. But why does he get angry and shout at me about my clothing? I'm very sad, upset... Please help needed!... :'((

[Theguyoverthere]

He probably doesn't want you getting other males' attention and is wondering why you would want all the attention instead of just his since you two are together. If you entered a bar like that you'd probably have guys trying to snag one night stands with you.

Plus even though you're getting attention, when guys are together you'll realize how degrading the attention you're getting is. Very few guys are thinking "Wow that girl is pretty." They're just thinking about what hole they want to put it in. As a guy I have gotten stuck listening to many guys talk behind the scenes and the things they say about girls can be very nasty.

They're saying things like, "Look at the ass on her. Wouldn't you wanna hit that?"

"You see the cleavage on her? How much does she charge?"

"Think she gives good head?"

"I bet she takes a good pounding."

... and so on. I've even heard younger people(teens) say things about one couple where the girl was wearing clothes and he instantly saw her as a dirty girl and was wondering why the guy was even with her if she wanted to pick up that much attention. He probably doesn't want you to meet a friend and have him say "Man, you picked up one dirty skank... she likes to show everything!" followed by a ton of questions of how you look naked.

You'd honestly be better off finding someone who enjoys the same attention you do where you two can show off you're bodies together and enjoy all that attention.

[Samsunlu055]

I liked your last paragraph because you wrote to sum up subject in the last paragraph. Either I'll talk with him about her pushy and insecured situation or I find another boys that look like to me about dressing up and we show our body structures free. :)

[Theguyoverthere]

Yea I am the type to get in a tank and go out and every so often I get a glance so I know the fun it can be.

[Sekrett]

Well you're definitely my type, I love girls who dress sexy. What's there to be insecure or to be threatened about. So what other guys are checking your girlfriend out? Having a Girlfriend that looks hot is bad? Not to mention guys are going to stare at your Girlfriend no matter what she's wearing. What about sexy jeans, guys will still be staring at her a$$.

Is he pretty religious btw? Usually people who have strong conservative view of religion portray it as immodest, only when it comes to girls though. Otherwise its pretty simple. He just doesn't like you getting a lot of attention from other guys, and feels threatened or insecure.

The best thing is simply to ask him. Why others guys like their GF's looking sexy and you don't? Only other solution is to dress sexy but tone it down, kinda in a middle, or completely conform to what he wants you to dress like. Alternatively I can't think of anything else other than find a Boyfriend who would love you dressing sexy ie someone like me.

[jayAUA]

There can only be cause and effect. It is easy to say your OK with it until guys try hitting on your girl every time she turns a corner. You don't have to understand the dynamics of snap judgments or for that sake the psychology behind attraction which is why I invite you to discover for yourself terms like sexualization of women and objectification so you may become more aware of the reality that also exist between your lines. cheers mate.

[SensAsianalGirl]

Your boyfriend doesn't "let" you wear sexy clothes because you "let" him tell you what you can and cannot wear. You're giving him the control to dictate what you wear and he's taking it. You need to learn to be assertive in your own wants, needs and desires.

He's going to say, its because he doesn't want guys to look at and disrespect you when in reality his insecurities is only causing jealousy because he prefers that no other man is looking at you. I bet he doesn't mind when other girls are looking at him and he probably wears whatever he wants, whether he's with you or not.

Stand up for yourself in a respectful manner and give him the assurance he needs that regardless of who may see you, that you are his girlfriend and you're secure in your relationship and he needs to be secure with you. Continue to carry yourself as a lady when you go out as to not give him a reason to doubt or not to trust you. If you continue to let him control you in terms of what you can wear, then eventually he may exercise control over you in other areas.

[jayAUA]

Unless he is ripped with a six pack and broad sportive chiseled body and butt with a gorgeous face and hair and THEN goes out wearing a tight jeans and a opened buttoned jacket without any undershirt so that every girl can see his abs then the challenge for you to be OK with his clothes don't really apply. It is when this would be the case that you would start questioning what his reasons would be for wanting all that attention and maybe even think it has to do with low self esteem.

[britannny]

Well, because he's an a**hole.

He probably doesn't like these outfits. Not that there's anything wrong with the human body, or that it's "bad" to show it off... but the style you described sounds pretty gaudy, to me. Not even close to being sexy.

Less is more. Tone it down a bit. It's much sexier to look classy than like a streetwalker.

But either way. It's your wardrobe, and if you feel good in those clothes, that's your business. Regardless of his opinion.

You (obviously) need a different boyfriend.

[Samsunlu055]

Yes I agree with you wardrobe belongs me but my choices are significant for my boyfriend. I feel good by myself when I wear sexy and confortable clothes for instance, bras, mini skirts and strapless look me smarter so I usually choose them. You said to me I needed a different boyfriend but, I love him for his character, he's tactful and easy-going person and quite hilarious :) So I don't think about any different problems out of wearing, he never says something about another subjects :)

[tiredofwaiting]

He is insecure and he sounds like control freak. He most likely doesn't like the attention you receive from other men when you dress like that. But you are old enough you don't and shouldn't need permission from him.If that were me I'd tell him to go f*** himself honestly.

[tiredofwaiting]

Thanks for BA :)

[jayAUA]

I believe you would like to read a book called: you are what you wear by Jennifer a psychologist (read chapter 5 in that book).
You see your clothes reflect a deeper part of your personality and to you may seem casual and fun. However in today's society men (and woman) still make quick what psychologists call "snap judgments" where basically someone creates a instant judgment based on their first impression of you and then they label you and after put you in a box ( figurative speaking) If the message your clothes send is one that speak sexy or slightly provocative then chances are these people will label you as such and in case of men labeling woman we often label you as an easy girl or one looking for more than just a friendly relationship. This may seem strange to you now but believe me there are lots of research just look up on psychology today and type search sexy woman and you will find terms like : hyper sexualization of girls and objectification of woman and even loads of articles on how a girls low self esteem becomes the reason they dare to wear or if you got it flaunt it to name a few. And often this temporarily makes you feel like your self esteem is high it quickly fades away as soon as you wear regular conservative outfits because the sexualization got the best of you. Find your tru beauty within and maybe you'll realize that all the rest is only an illusion of beauty created by men.

[Maestro9]

He does not like other guys looking at you, but if you feel that he is making you change who you are ( and the way you dress is part of that) then he is being a little too controlling. You should probably tell him that he is making you feel like you have to change. Explain that, you love him but if he is being so judgmental, it is going to make your relationship very strained.

[Samsunlu055]

Yes you are so true but must impurtant issue is we are living modern city, that is nit understandable...

[Maestro9]

Times have moved on and you just have to talk to him about this directly cos otherwise, you will start to feel resentful and it will make your relationship worse.

[Anonymous]

And you tolerate him treating you like that? That's your fault for letting him control you.you're a grown woman but you let him control your wardrobe and talk to you any kind of way when you don't wear what he wants.

[jayAUA]

Why objectify your own self just to fulfill your sense of self worth?

[foxsquirrel]

Not about your clothing he gets angry but more specifically with your kind of streetwalker clothing he gets angry. Either he does not want people to think he is with a slut or he does not want all the men thinking of having sex with you whenever they see you or both.

[bDizzie]

He's insecure. I wish I had a girl that liked to dress up, the one I'm talking to wears nothing but jeans and t-shirts

[JamielovesKU]

You ask ask him why he gets mad, I think it may be because he doesn't want other men to see what you have, idk...best thing to do is ask, maybe he doesn't like it on you and wishes youd wear something else...

[cavmanier]

It's ultimately because he doesn't want you to get other males attention. I'm assuming, you want the male gaze and to feel attractive. There's nothing wrong with that by the way.

[unighted]

he shouldn't control what you wear, he does it because he feels like he can and he like other male attention you may get, but showing bra straps in a strapless dress is not really classy, go for the strapless bras.

[isoldeskywalker]

Sister, if you want me to be frank and straightforward, I think your boyfriend is a control freak who's not letting you be your own girl and you should dump him before it becomes abusive or toxic.

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend allows me to wear anything I want, the most revealing clothes that exist, and he doesn't care if other guys look at me. Firstly I liked it now I just think he is completely indifferent to me so I would rather be in your situation.

[Samsunlu055]

Hmmm that looks worse...

[Opinion Owner]

Believe me you are a lucky girl! He just so loves you and cares about you, and he wants you to be only his

[Samsunlu055]

yes but his some treatments bored me so much in result of this situation I have lodged a complain his this situation...

[jayAUA]

That's because he never did like it

[soe11]

I do compliment to my girlfriend whatever she wear however she wear whenever she wear.
I proud of my girlfriend revealing outfits in public, some occasions vlshe doesn't wear bra and panti.

[Andrew1968]

Give him a choice - either he is dumped or you both wear a mini skirt and strapless sexy clothes for your next date.

[lauramor]

He needs to stop, you can wear what you want. So talk to him

[Samsunlu055]

Good, you are righ and you have good impression like it :) I haven't got any ways that I will do. The best way is talking with him :)

[lauramor]

Yeah tell him you are in a relationship but that doesn't make him your boss.

[Samsunlu055]

Actually he looks like boss only about wearing, clothing etc. We are in Samsun city of Turkey maybe you've heard, girls are attractive, furthermore I sometimes remove my bikini topwear (bra) in the beach and my friends also do it. But firts of all it depends what kind of person my boyfriend is...

[lauramor]

I haven't heard but when I went to france a lot of girls did that too, but well he knew who you were before getting into the relationship. Good luck

[Samsunlu055]

Yes I know France :)) and french girls are very amart and they always dress up :) We are from Samsun so we must be as attractive as french girls :))) Sam Sam Sam Samsunn :))))

[soe11]

There are many best adviced from othes so no need from me, just leave him as soon as possible, sake of happiness.

[groovyyd]

Instead of him telling you that he doesn't want you wearing the clothes he should be glad that you wear cute clothes & if he's afraid of other guys looking at you he should feel good cause your his & he has something those other guys don't have

[Anonymous]

Turkey is still pretty backwards when it comes to how men treat women

[Samsunlu055]

where are you from? I was wondering just so I asked you.

Our men are pretty and women also but certainly some differences may exist, it hasn't got any problems, OK?

[Opinion Owner]

turkey is still pretty backwards when it comes to how men treat their women. Do you understand this?

[Samsunlu055]

Yess no please don't misunderstand me, just cuirous and I was wondering, nothing else...

[Opinion Owner]

okkkk

[Sixgun77]

I don't get it. I'd love to have a girlfriend that dressed like that on a regular basis.

[Malaya]

Strict over your clothing

[Agulay2]

Be yourself, don't care about him

[888theGreat]

he wants all that stuff for himself not other men

[dommage]

dont let him do that, wear whatever you want