How should a guy handle a coquette's (mixed signals, hot/cold) behavior?

[Anonymous]

He can't read her mind or really know why's she's doing it. Maybe she has mixed feelings about him, maybe she's reacting to mixed feelings from him, maybe she's hoping he chases her, maybe she doesn't want to sound to eager and it's a defense mechanism, maybe she just craves control. Fact is, it often leads to frustration and confusion. I'm dealing with a girl like that, and if she's acting like that I don't see why I should put myself too far out there, when all I'm getting from her is confusion. Any ideas how a guy should play her game, and turn the game around? Just be completely honest, or play along? If I want to play, of course I can't eat it up when she decides to flirt.

[Anonymous]

i think that sometimes is the guy just making assumptions, don't get me wong girls do it to but people should really refrain from that. it only makes situations harder

[Asker]

Assumptions, more specifially? Of course I'm gonna make a few assumptions: I might assume if she's obviously flirting, she's interested. Then if she ignores me after I might assume her interest isn't very high.

[dazed15]

if she's really flirting, she may have been out of her comfort zone, saw it and needed to slow down. that or, if you started showing interest it scared her. if you haven't let her make a fool of herself, or otherwise mad her mad, she's probably embarassed.

[BluefireJon]

Be honest, playing along is a form of manipulation for your own personal gain. If you want her and she doesn't want you, leave her alone and move on.

[dazed15]

nice word choice!