Ex holding my belongings hostage in order to see me?

[Anonymous]

My ex (I'll leave out the details) told me last night he has my belongings and something he made me but instead of mailing them tomorrow, he said "I'm going to hold it hostage and you can pick it up on your way to your friends, give me a hug and leave." We live 1.5 hours away but he's on the way to my friends. I replied with, "well I'm not going to visit her soon (and I'm not) and don't want to break my ankle in my new shoes I got." and "meany" (trying to lighten the situation and flirt). I wasn't going to jump for joy that my jerky ex was initiated something. He seemed put off by this and replied with "I'm just kidding and won't be mean, I'll send you your stuff".

Do you think he really wants to see me and was upset that I sort of rejected his idea? Is he dangling my shoes I want back in order to bribe me to see him? Just curiuos if you think he really does want to see me. I miss him but I don't want him to hurt me anymore so I'm seeing how much he truly will try.

[precious144]

I think he was being serious when he first said it, and hoped for you to say OK I'll come and get them, probably so he could see you. Then once you didn't give him the reaction he wanted, he pretended he was joking.

I don't know, I may be wrong but that's just what I think of it. I'm not sure if he was upset that you rejected his idea but he may of been a bit gutted because he might of been expecting you to agree to it.

[Asker]

Thank you, that makes perfect sense and what I was thinking. I typically jump at every opportunity to see him, even in our relationship so I'm sure he was mad/sad/wahtever. I used to beg him to see me so I decided not too because it shouldn't be like that. The fact that he says "and leave" put me off so I basically was like, no thank you. I'm not coming for a hug and you to break my heart so you can get some attention and feel better. If he wants to see me, he needs to ask me out normally.

[daysgobye]

I think he was serous but didn't want to seem like a nut. He still cares very much about you, he wants to see you one last time. As you mentioned you live 1.5 hours away and he is on the way to your friends house he thought possibly you would stop by. It would be closer to the relationship. By the sounds of it you two broke up in some matter but not in person. Am I correct? I think he really wants to see you.

[Asker]

Good call, we split over the phone through many dramatic phone calls. He kept hanging up/ignorning me out of the blue and I wanted answers. I guess I'll see if he tries again, I've been doing my best to ignore it when he says he misses me/compliments me/asks to see me etc. to see how he genuinely feels.

[daysgobye]

I'm going through a break up too, and I've been dating for a little while. If he was hanging up/ ignoring you He probably didn't know what to say. I think you need to keep to the mailing, seeing him will be very hard. He might beg for your forgiveness etc. Boys like him that hang up have issues not saying he's a bad guy but it sounds like possibly he has a temper. He probably still has feelings for you. The break up being new he is devastates him. To a guy to know how he truly feels is hard to d

[Asker]

Sorry you're dealing with a break up too. He does have a temper and never could come to terms with being in love with me. I think I'm the only girl he's really ever loved even though he's been with many many girls. For once in our relationship he actually admitted to being wrong, that I did nothing wrong and that it was him with the problem. This is HUGE for him to admit so maybe he is finally realizing what tru efeelings are who knows.

[kbestyet]

just go their with a police & get your stuff & be done. simple

[Asker]

hahaha the stuff isn't that important to drive all the way down there, hence why I want it mailed. He wronged me so I figured it was the least he could do.