Girls, stop getting mad at us boys for wanting lots of sex.

[Anon-ymous1]

This shouldn't take too long.

It apparently needs to be said, judging by some plebeian comments I often see on GaG (i.e., "not all girl/guys are the same! how dare you generalize even though I myself do it all the time!"), that when speaking about generalities and generalizations, we are talking about the overwhelming majority of whatever you're speaking about, not. literally. each. and. every. single. person. on. the. face. of. the. Earth. There will always be exceptions to ANY rule when speaking about sociological matters. However! in many cases, they are outliers. An exception is NOT the rule, or disproof of the rule. If a Bell Curve of people, 66-70% or so think a thing, then we can comfortably say that "most people think X thing." I'm surprised that needs to be said, but apparently a lot of people out there have never taken any statistics or sociology courses.

Anyway...

So something I've noticed many times on GaG,

or elsewhere online, and when (unfortunately) hearing girls talk about sex in person, inevitably, is that they get flummoxed at guys for various things, right? We're guys-- we're terrible. We know. How dare we guy around all day, guying all over the guy. We're the guyest guys who have ever guy'd. Guys just SUCK man. We're the WORST. Truly awful. Because, you know... we consider sex to be important and one of the driving factors in life. We don't seek relationships enough, or if we do, we just want sex. Everyone knows that right? And sex is baaaaad, unless it coincides correctly with what the girl wants too, to the utter utmost tee.

Many girls seem to get mad at us guys for wanting a lot of sex, including on the first date (read: not EXPECTING sex on first date, but WANTING sex on first date; they're not the same thing), or just more than they do. But herein lies the problem-- girls still want it. What's the sense in getting frustrated at someone who wants the same thing you do, just more of it? I don't get mad at girls who want the same things I do, even if they want it more badly. It only makes sense to be vexed at someone who you think has their priorities way out of whack *if you don't share the same priorities.*

Do you want it or not?

You can't have your cake and eat it too. Those who claim that girls want sex as much as guys, you can't make that claim (you really don't want it as much though... you only think you do, but that's currently beside the point) and then get mad at guys who "only want sex," whatever the hell that means. Yeah, we want sex. Yep. You got it. With every single hot/pretty girl we see, all the time, everywhere we go. And... so? So what? Again, so you may not want it as much, but you still want it, so what leg do you have to stand on to criticize guys for wanting it too? "Guys just want hookups," which is hilarious that that's allegedly supposed to be a criticism of some kind, or... something; I'm not really even sure. That's like me getting annoyed at girls for just wanting to go out to eat all the time at expensive restaurants... when I also very much enjoy that experience. It's low brow crap.

It's dumb, and makes you look dumb, even if you're not.

Stop.

Thanksssss. Hugs and kisses.

[heyyyyy123]

I don't think a lot of guys have to deal with that unless they are a very young couple in their early teens and the girl is nervous, or unless they are older and their sex drives are naturally going down. And there is always the occasion of girls who actually have naturally low sex drives, they can't help it. That is when the guy in the relationship has the make a decision if he wants to live with someone with an incompatible sex drive then them for the rest of their lives.
I haven't heard of a lot of stories where girls don't want to have sex that much and the guy is just begging. I am someone who goes either way. I probably do have a normal to somewhat high sex drive. Not as high as my boyfriends, but I can deal with it pretty well. I just have a lot of fun while doing it, so I can do it many times for multiple days if we wanted to. Doesn't mean I'm begging for it after a while, but I'll do it because its fun and I know he enjoys it. I think it just depends if the girl likes it or not as well. It might feel good to them, but not everybody is super into it like others. My boyfriend could go for hours and hours and hours.
Also, when i first met my boyfriend he was the kind of guy who had almost gotten every girl he asked out to sleep with him on the first date, and if not the second date. I was the longest one he ever took to sleep with. I had met up with him about four time before I had sex. He was my first and I was nervous but I wasn't being a prude about it, I just am very wary about who i do things with. And he wasn't mad about it, he actually liked to be around me and at the time he was getting laid by other girls because we weren't together.
It's all about perspective, I think he was actually interested in me because I took a little bit longer and teased him more than other girls. And I ended up dating him weirdly enough with us being complete opposites.
Nobody is trying to withhold sex from someone on purpose, and if they are then that is called manipulation and there is an underlying problem or situation with that person. It is not a normal thing someone should do to others, its wrong. Thats just my take on it, sorry if I was all over the place in my response!

[Anon-ymous1]

No that's a very good, thoughtful response. Thanks for it.

[FamousAF]

Lol what are you on about? Probably 90% of guys want more sex than they're getting. And not with the same fucking woman year in-year out.

It's amazing how women just ALWAYS approach this subject from their own ideosyncratic perspective. They literally seem unable to fathom that it could be any different.

[heyyyyy123]

@FamousAF If you are going to that about guys, then the same can go for woman. I had a good friend who would tell me how her boyfriend would tell her he was too tired to have sex with her and would jerk off like three times a day when she was at work and say "Oh well, you weren't here at the time". He would probably have sex like once or twice a week with her and she made it very obvious that wanted more sex. He just didn't care. It goes both ways, he was in a relationship willingly and refused to meet her needs which weren't insane to manage.
I think it comes down to sexual drive levels, one somebody who has a high sex drive should not be with someone who has a low sex drive. It doesn't work in my opinion, I would even go as far to say that sexual compatibility is just as important as emotional and personality compatibility. Sex is important in a relationship and nobody should be deprived of it in that situation.

[FamousAF]

Yeah, but you presume that it's in a relationship. Most guys are not in a relationship at all. For many guys, that is not gonna happen. So it's fucking irritating to hear women who can get whatever they want as easy as 1-2-3 telling us it's not a problem.

[heyyyyy123]

@FamousAF I think that has to do with how men and woman are biologically designed honestly. Sex is used for procreating as well as enjoyment, but the main biological drive to have sex is for procreation. Woman are the ones who will hold the child for 9 months and give birth, so logically girls have the right to choose between their options and who they deem the best. And if there no options they personally want, they won't choose them. Whether its fair or not, is not really what our hormones care about. Just whoever is best to mate with. Guys are driven to pursue girls and whoever they see and is attractive they have a drive to just stick it in and then go to the next one. Woman do that have that choice, its one man then 9 months of pregnancy. That is one way to look at the situation, if we want to get technical.

[heyyyyy123]

@FamousAF But i'm not trying to disagree with you, in all honesty I could never imagine why a girl would not want to have sex with a man who they are in a relationship with every time they are with them. But I am also not the type of person to sleep with someone I meet on the first night, some other girls are more than happy to, its a preference. I don't understand completely why girls are completely to blame here, maybe I just don't understand fully where you are coming from.

[FamousAF]

True. But only guys get shit for it.

[FamousAF]

a) Marriage, that is all for the woman's sake. You think a guy cares about a wedding? No he doesn't.
b) If you tell a woman you just want sex, she gets mad and tells you off
c) If you pretend you want something more, she gets mad and tells you off
d) You can't win

[Anon-ymous1]

@heyyyyy123 Well to be fair, if he doesn't want sex, then something is wrong. Like in their relationship. I'm speaking to the example of your friend that you gave.

[Anon-ymous1]

Up to and including that he was/is no longer physically attracted to her, possibly due to weight gain or other factors.

[heyyyyy123]

Then that can go for woman as well if we are assuming. I knew you guys were going to go in on her and say that there was something wrong with her and thats weird. But she didn't gain weight and this happened early in the relationship, he was just being a jerk honesty. If he isn't attracted to her anymore, why are they still dating? That has nothing to do with sex drive, a woman could be withholding sex from a guy because of his looks as well? So where do we go from there

[Unit1]

These girls, who get upset about guys craving for sex are either ignorant, stupid or hate men. Like someone already said, we have much higher levels of testosterones in our bodies and it just happened to be us being the ones craving sex from women like crazy.

Girls, who have a problem with this will have a big problem getting into and maintaining a relationship. Hell, SEX is one of the primary freaking reasons most relationships exist at all.
News flash!

[Anon-ymous1]

Basically.

[TrixiePooch]

So you are a man and use a female avatar. Interesting.

[Unit1]

@TrixiePooch Take a closer look and maybe you will see *it*.

[TrixiePooch]

Maybe for men. And you wonder why more women are turning gay and bi.

[Unit1]

@TrixiePooch i don't know what you're talking about

[TrixiePooch]

I didn't think you would.

[Unit1]

Thanks for the MHO pal!

[ChronicThinker]

I'm not mad at you for wanting a lot of sex. It's only annoying when you throw your cock at me and get mad when I'm not down.

Otherwise, we're on the same team.

[Anon-ymous1]

Shame to hear some girls aren't into the cock-toss.

[ChronicThinker]

There's more graceful ways to present the cock.

[Anon-ymous1]

I prefer tossing it. Like doing a keg toss. Except heavier.

[Lilyanony]

I despise that comment about girls who say men only want sex have nothing to offer.
There are a lot of women out there with a lot of good qualities, but it depends upon the audience that it's being directed.

Take London for example it's busy it's the happening place everyone is looking for their 15 mins of fame.
If a guy meets a down to earth girl who just wants the simple life without the thrills and flashing lights. He'll make use of her whilst his down then dump her whilst he's making headway. Why because she was prepared to settle for less then we he had less than.
Nice decent qualities are no longer looked upon in a nice way it's frowned upon and mocked often labelling the person a mug. Or the stepping stone to their destination.

If a guy wants to just have sex go for it, but there's also a thing of treating another person with respect.
What people have forgotten is if each of those people said no. You wouldn't have been able to satisfy your needs.

All most women are concerned about is the deceit the lies and empty promises and the fact that you're slating her after you did the deed if it was so bad and you had so much self respect you wouldn't actually stick it In something you deem a tramp as you'd be worried you'll catch something.

Just grow up. And be honest.
Own what you want move on if they say no.

[Anon-ymous1]

Sure and that sounds all well and good. I just think you're creating a false equivalency by insinuating that if a guy wants sex, it must mean he does not want to treat her with respect. That's crap.

[Lilyanony]

No I think you'll find lots of examples where that happens listen to what people talk about on first dates when they discuss their past relationships. Listen to what happening on love island. Look at a made in Chelsea and the only way is Essex. Love and hip hop. You may say they are lower class women and men but their are people there from food backgrounds and a lot of the guys use the women and dispose of them. Some of the girls start out nice then get hurt and then display this don't care attitude when really they do. There are more instances if guys dumping a girl for being a bad lay, easy lay. A boring lay, or because they have a hit it and quit it attitude. I don't see how that is false equivalency. It's something that happens. Maybe you are the rare few that doesn't but most do or they hide behind their friends stories too shy to take the plunge for fear of getting hurt/humiliated.
Which is why statically more people are abstaining. That and fear of not living up to expectation

[Anon-ymous1]

Huh? More people aren't abstaining. Where have you heard that?
I also, no offense, think it's very bizarre that you're taking real-life love advice or "information" or whatever from... reality TV shows. That... are not real, at all, in any way.

[Lilyanony]

They were examples that I knew you had a higher chance of seeing than me talking about my own independent experiences. There are nice guys there are jerks. There are nice girls there are also jerky women.
There are many people abstaining and there are many people being free and frivolous and also cautious about who they sleep with.
It's free choice. But to state that women a person has nothing more to offer which is why they are just a leg over is rude. They are clearly not compatible beyond the physical because both are two different or one isn't looking to get to know the other at a deeper level

[TrixiePooch]

Really? Is that the reason guys ask girls for nudes, because they respect her or because they just want to jack off to the pics? Either way this type of guy is a pig.

[Browneye57]

A guy has some 15-25 times the testosterone in his system, the sex-drive hormone, that any woman. It is physically impossible for girls to relate to this. So they complain.
The smart ones, more mature ones, know this, and the ones that have spent considerable time with men. Young women simply do not grasp the differences between men and women, and the entire FI keeps telling them everyone is the same, equal, alike. Just. Not. True.

[hsshannah96]

You can want sex all you please. Just stop begging for it within a few months into the relationship. By begging I mean, “please!!” “I have needs” “It’s your duty” and get up in our personal bubble till we do. But again you are welcome to jack off and need sex. That doesn’t bother me.

[Browneye57]

@hsshannah96 Nice. Your relationships will fail as well. Hope you like cats. :)

[hsshannah96]

No they will not. They won’t fail with a guy who respects me as a person. You’re welcome to want sex all you want. Watch porn. Jack off but my body my choice.

[hsshannah96]

You wouldn’t understand unless someone twice your size was towering over you and wouldn’t shut up and kept begging till I went “fine!!!”
You can want it. That’s fine. What’s not fine is begging and coercing women. MY BODY. MINE. It’s not yours and it’s not an object

[hsshannah96]

Have fun jacking off to porn!

[Browneye57]

@hsshannah96 You're whiny too. Yep, they'll fail. Oh well.
You bring your unrelated problems into a conversation about desire. I'm sure this is what you do with everything. Consider just shutting the fuck up.

[Anon-ymous1]

She's a moron dude, don't bother; I was trying to actually just talk to her and she blocked me, so I blocked her back. She needs professional help... I guess you can't help everyone though. Shrug.

[Unit1]

Spoken like a prophet. Just saying.

[TrixiePooch]

Wanting sex is not the problem. Wanting it when the girl is not wanting it is the problem. When I'm on my period and feel like crap from PMS or pain and bloating, sex is the last thing I want. Guys don't go through that so don't understand why we don't want sex. Bad migraines may be another time sex is off the table. We want to be able to enjoy it too you know. We just like to know that you respect our feelings when we are not able to comply. Having sex when you are in pain is not an enjoyable experience. That would be like us wanting to have sex when you just got circumcised and are in a lot of pain.

[Anon-ymous1]

No one is talking about physical pain. I have no idea why you even brought that up.

[TrixiePooch]

Well, I'm giving you reasons girls don't want sex all the time. If you want sex all the time marry a nymphomaniac or get a prostitute. Five fingered Mary is also an option. I think your tirade makes you look insecure. Are you married by the way?

[Anon-ymous1]

Nope. And again, the post isn't about physical pain. I have no idea why you brought that up.

[Luke_James]

Never really had to deal with that.

Some girls might really have issues about it.
But most of them probably get what they deserve. "Girls who say "Guys only want sex!!" usually have nothing more to offer".
You nailed it.
Interesting girls will never have to deal with that as, beyond their physical appearance, we like to talk, joke and have fun with them.
On the other side, superficial and sophisticated girls doing the best they can to attract our attention may well be the ones to make such statements. But meh, isn't it kind of ironic...

[BrileyCat]

then there are some single girls like me . who don't want a relationship .
i have lots of guy friends who know that . and who know sex is not an option .
i don't get mad if they want it . but in some way i have to let them know i'm not interested .
generally i don't tease or lead anyone on . unless i feel like surprising a guy with a spontaneous blow job . usually bc they respected my space and treated me nice . when a guy asks me
on a date i'll go out with them bc i'm already interested in sex with them . and i know that's
what they'll want . but if they say or do something stupid on the date. then forget it .
but don't get mad at me if i can't fit you in to my schedule . or i don't feel like it .
or i'm having a bad day .

[debi2622]

My boyfriend calls me an energizer bunny when it comes to wanting sex with him. I have no problems with anyone else wanting sex (I cannot throw that stone). What I DO have a problem with are the manipulations and games to get sex (from guys and girls). But you make some great points.

[MlleCake]

It's ok to want sex. It's not ok to coerce or pressure. It's not ok to condemn women for also wanting sex. It's not ok to say you love someone and want a relationship when you don't just to get sex.

What's best is to be honest and accept other people for who they are. If you fancy someone who prefers to go slow and delay sex, maybe you need to decide not to go after that person.

But there's nothing weird, wrong or abnormal about adults, any adult, to have sexual desire.

[Anon-ymous1]

Well if you fancy someone, you fancy them for a myriad of reasons usually. It's fine to want the person you want to want the same things that you want. That's pretty typical. Doesn't mean it's going to happen, but there's nothing wrong with wanting your wants to coincide.

[TrixiePooch]

You sound like the type of guy who will cheat on someone if she is not up to sex when you are. After all you got to have sex one way or the other, right? But then again, can you even have a real relationship with a woman. Having sex is not a relationship in case you missed that in your reading of "How to get sex from a woman"

[Anon-ymous1]

@TrixiePooch "How to get sex from a woman" I don't know what that is. Anyway, if you don't want it, then that's fine. If you do, don't blame guys for wanting it. It's very, very simple.

[TrixiePooch]

That is the book you've been reading that you seem to base your post on.

[Anon-ymous1]

@TrixiePooch I already said I don't know what it is, so, no. That's not correct.

[MlleCake]

She's referring to a metaphorical book.

[BrittBratt2416]

Stop getting made at women who seek/want an actual loving long term relationship with a man instead of being settled for as a fuck buddy. Wanting sex isn't an issue, it's when you make sex a top priority in a relationship or when dating. If women see that's all a man is after, then we want nothing to do with them cause we don't want to be another hit and quit on his list. Sex is great, but it's even better when it's done in a committed relationship with someone you know is going to be there the next day, and the day after that, and the day after that.

[Jaybear0123]

So true. I wish more guys were like this.

[Anon-ymous1]

I guess I'm unclear as to why the only concern in life is supposed to be committed relationships, as though that is sacrosanct above all other worldly considerations.

[FamousAF]

Lol I love how all these dumb AF women CANNOT for the life of them separate what THEY want and consider the right kind of relationship with what is OBJECTIVELY the right kind of relationship. It's kind of scary, actually. Get over yourselves girls.

[Jaybear0123]

@FamousAF i have nothing against sex in a relationship I just think you should give it some time before doing it with someone and I wouldn’t want to be with a guy that has sex with me and then throws me away you know that would suck. Feeling this way doesn’t make me or anyone dumb it’s very hurtful to have some use you and then throw you away

[Jaybear0123]

Im glad it hasn’t happend to me but for other girls it has and it’s really sad

[FamousAF]

@Jaybear0123 That does not make you dumb, no, and I wasn't referring to you. It's just tiring that so many women preach and shame men for what we want just because it differs from what they want. You were kind and worded it like it is your preference, which is totally legit. It's more when someone starts to sound like your damn mother that it gets irritating.

[Jaybear0123]

@FamousAF I understand

[Kaytiee]

I don't mind guys who want sex, as long as it doesn't get out of hand, us girls are horny too!

Honestly whoever says these things aren't worth it, sometimes guys can be a bit demanding but if you're a genuine person you should be like, alright them I'll tone it down a bit, same goes for everything in a relationship tbh.

[Anon-ymous1]

Tone it down a bit? What do you mean?

[Kaytiee]

Not ask for it as much, or don't push for it when we've said no, I think asking for it a lot it what develops this attitude.

[Anon-ymous1]

Develops what attitude?

[Kaytiee]

The one where girls assume every guy just wants sexual favours

[Anon-ymous1]

Guys do want sex. That's the point of the Take. And that it's pointless for girls to get mad about that since they want it too. Also the point of the Take.

[Kaytiee]

I'm talking about when a girl has said no, and doesn't want it yet the man keeps pressuring her for it, I agree with the take and do not shame men or women for wanting sex, but if someone says no or they aren't in the mood let it be, if you're in a relationship and she says could you tone things down, you should as that's how a healthy relationship works communication and adapting, and the girl will do the same if the man has anything that needs to be changed,

You can deny this but it's truth.

[Anon-ymous1]

Uh I'm not denying it. There's some truth to that I guess. Denying him is also not a good way to keep him happy, so if you want a *happy* healthy relationship... Anyway, if he denies her on things that she wants then she isn't going to be happy either. There's no difference.

[Kaytiee]

Thats why people adapt, did I say never have sex? Nope stop blowing things out of proportion x

[Anon-ymous1]

No, you didn't. I didn't say you did.

[Kaytiee]

Predictable answer, you're acting as if I did, end of conversation two people need to adapt to have a good healthy stable relationship.

[Anon-ymous1]

Sure.

[Molkabz]

I guess it depends on how good in bed a guy is, timing is important too because libido changes throughout the month, the way the guy initiates/presents sex too, it should be seen as a link between a couple not some obligation/task to finish asap
I also don't think guys are that much hornier than girls, there is a great percentage of girls that would hump u until they break ur bones so i think it depends on the kind of girl in question :)

[Anon-ymous1]

Guys do want it more. A lot more.

[Molkabz]

dont generalize, i know a couple girls (not sluts) that would go for a couple dozen rounds a day lol

[Anon-ymous1]

Gotta read the first paragraph again.

[TobyWinters]

I'm one of the exceptions. Low sex drive. But I certainly want sex quite often and think about sex a lot. I am genetically programmed to do so. I just don't think "I want it now," I think of future situations.

Even a guy with a small libido thinks about sex all the time :(

[Anon-ymous1]

Then why do you consider yourself to have a "small libido" if you think about sex all the time?

[TobyWinters]

I think about sex a lot. I don't want sex a lot. Think of it as me thinking about what I want for dinner: all these different foods and delicacies and options, delicious. But I don't want to eat dinner in the morning, I was just thinking about it.

[Anon-ymous1]

If you say so.

[ReachingNirvana]

Virgin alert - take my words with a grain of salt, haha.

But I personally don't find it offensive for boy to want a lot of sex. From me, or anyone, provided they're legal. I think the only issue I would ever have is if sex was the only driving factor making a man interested in me. Even then, that doesn't make me mad as much as it makes me disappointed. I wouldn't even say I get annoyed as much as I feel a little bummed out or awkward because I'm obviously not looking for JUST that.

[lilaqua]

Maybe it's because sex with you is bad but a vibrator + the relationship weighs out the negatives. I'm happy to have sex all the time but I need some build up, if you just stick it in no question constantly i'm going to get pissed.

[Anon-ymous1]

Oh, well definitely not pointing out the *type* of sex or whatever, just speaking in generalities here.

[lilaqua]

Well the type of sex is important. In my personal life I find issues can occur if the guy is into quickies all the time. It's not fur-filling for us, because you finish by the time I get started. It's not fun and it makes us frustrated.

[Anon-ymous1]

Right.

[BleachyPeachyBoi]

I don’t get why some guys think this is all there is to a relationship, it is obviously a big part, but if I wanted to fucc™️ all the time then I would abandon having a serious and healthy relationship and just pay a prostitute or something instead.

[Anon-ymous1]

Except that all prostitutes have STDs, so...

[BleachyPeachyBoi]

True, but I’m pretty sure some people would still risk contracting them just to get a few minutes of pleasure.

[Juxtapose]

Exactly. Women are so annoying in this regard, it's such a turn off. I'm mostly bi and let me tell you..

Men put out at the drop ofa hat. It beautiful.

[CoffeeWC]

There are so many people out there who need some sense smacked into them.

[Anon-ymous1]

Indeed.

[Anonymous]

Guys stop getting mad at us girls for wanting relationships! Lol just sayin’

[Anon-ymous1]

We aren't mad; we're just ambivalent.

[Opinion Owner]

I’d say it’s mutual! Lol. I tried the whole sex thing once with someone I knew for a while that I found really attractive, and I can honestly say never again as I ended up falling for him - that was a mistake better avoided!

[Anon-ymous1]

"the whole sex thing?" I don't know what that means.

[FamousAF]

Nah. It gets tiring. You're always fucking shaming us for wanting sex. You're always presenting your preferences as if they're the only reasonable option. Because you have the upper hand. So pathetic.

[BOOMBOOMBOX]

Well I like sex, and if my man is good at it, I wouldn't mind having it everyday. So there you go.

[Anon-ymous1]

Fair enough.

[markscott]

I hope this doesn't mean, that a girl shouldn't get mad, because all a guy want is sex.

[Anon-ymous1]

Huh?

[markscott]

I said exactly what I meant. Under the over all heading of the initial post: "Girls stop getting mad at guys for wanting lots of sex." I replied, I hope this doesn't mean, that a girl shouldn't get mad, because all a guy wants is sex.

[Anon-ymous1]

I guess I still don't really understand what you mean, based on how you worded it.

[markscott]

If all a guys wants out of a relationship is sex, that is different from him always wanting sex. If he always wants sex, he can still be interested in a good relationship. If all he wants is sex, there is no real relationship.

[Anon-ymous1]

Not sure I agree, but thanks for clearing it up.